Coming Alive, a Naoki POV fanfic
by TheMoonFly
Summary: He was always so cold and callous towards others... but then she came along and he began to change. With emotions unknown to him, he learns to feel and love.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

* * *

Author's note: This is a fanfiction I've been planning on for a while now. It's based off of the Japanese drama version from 2013, though the only place this could be categorized is in anime/manga. In this version, I've made Naoki the main character. I hope you enjoy and review. :) -TheMoonFly

Someone was watching me. I could feel their gaze, and see as they peeked around corners, following me. I didn't know her, and if she didn't stop following me, I would tell her to do so myself. How tiring these games could become.

After a couple of minutes, she was gone. Coming around a corner to enter the school gates, she appeared again and headed right for me, holding an envelope in her hands. Not in the mood for this, I tried to ignore her and walk by. Only, she stopped me.

"Excuse me." She said. With no way to ignore it, I acknowledged her.

"Who are you?" I asked, wanting to get this over with. The girl was visibly nervous and jittery. She had a dumb look on her face and the aura she manifested was slightly deluded. No mistaking, she was in Class F. Interacting with those people always gave me a headache. They could barely grasp comprehension of their own language on the best of days.

"My name is Kotoko Aihara, from Class F," She said in a rush, the words tumbling from her mouth, "Could you please read this?" She held out the envelope to me. I understood what this was, then. It was a love confession… one surely riddled with spelling errors and the misuse of big words to try and impress me. I had no interest in it, and it would've been a waste of my time even to read it. It only took a moment for me to form my opinion of her, and it was not an attractive one. I wanted nothing to do with dumb people.

I was silent.

"Irie," She said, "I love you." Those around us stopped and stared on, entertained by this embarrassment of a confession. This was attracting too much attention. Rumors would taint Tonan's gossip by lunch time. While my classmates would have fun with this stunt, I could say that I was quite agitated with it. I didn't want my school days burdened with this attention. And it would be her fault for assuming I ever would be interested in a girl from Class F.

"I don't want it." I said, turning away from her and heading into the school. Behind me, she was devoured by laughter. She deserved nothing less. It was beyond me what would've prompted her to do that right in front of the school gates where so many would see. But she was from Class F. They weren't the kind of people who actually used their brains to think of these crucial details beforehand.

I arrived to class thoroughly piqued. In no less than half an hour, the word had spread through the entire school. Even my class, Class A, which was normally unaffected by rumors and uninterested in gossip, spoke of it.

I was humiliated to be associated with this girl. It became worse as the day progressed. I was asked too many questions and rumors distorted unreasonably. I received many looks from other girls.

Even Watanabe was curious.

"So, what was with that girl earlier?" He asked during class.

"Just a typical Class F with delusions." I said. There was not much more I wanted to say. That was all she was and I wanted nothing more to do with her or this ever-growing popularity of hers.

...

On the way home from school, I can say that I was relieved not to have seen her again, though throughout the school day, she could be heard in the halls shouting "leave me alone" or "stop that, Kin-chan". She was a loud girl, another quality I loathed. But it was not shocking, coming from her kind.

Stepping through the front door of my house, my mother went about her usual routine.

"You're home," she said, "How was school?" She raised her eyebrows and smiled wisely, like she already knew, but I was fairly certain she didn't. Unless she did. Sometimes, it was hard to tell with her, and she seemed to know everything.

"The same as always." I said.

"Oh, Onii-chan, you never share anything with me." She pouted. I took to the stairs and went to my bedroom. There, I was able to relax, away from my mother and the gazes of my classmates who either shook their heads at my so-called "cruelty" or took part in spreading rumors about my love life.

I sat on my bed and read until nightfall with nothing better to do since my homework was already completed. It was interrupted not long after the sun went down.

There was an excited tap at my door and my mother bursted into the room. I looked up from my book.

"We're going to have guests!" She said in overjoyment. In a snap, she started to scoot my desk down the room. Outside my door, my younger brother, Yuuki, whined about something I didn't quite catch through the scraping of the desk's legs against the floor.

I threw the book to the side and stood.

"What are you doing?" The desk reached the far end of the room and she stopped pushing, only to rush over to me and shoo me out of my own bedroom.

"I already said," She said, "We're having guests. Now, out with you. I have some rearranging to do."

I was shoved out the door to find Yuuki, who was not pleased in any sense.

"What is going on now?" I asked him. It was a usual occurrence for my mother to become over-excited about things.

"She wants us to share a bedroom so that stupid girl can have mine!" Yuuki wailed. I didn't agree with it. I didn't know these people, yet my brother and I should be squeezed into one bedroom to accommodate them? I needed to talk to my father about this.

As I came down the stairs, I could hear my father on the phone. To wait for him to be done with his business, I propped myself up on the banister.

"Yes," I heard, "Right! No problem at all. You'd be welcome. Umhm… I'll be seeing you tomorrow, then. Bye." My father hung up the phone and found me.

"What's this about guests?" I said.

"It's my best friend and his daughter. Their house has collapsed, and they need a place to stay for now." I had a bad feeling about this.

"Who are they?"

"Shigeo and Kotoko Aihara. You might know her. She goes to Tonan." He answered casually, but I stiffened at the mere mention of her name. One nightmare was turning into another. Sharing a roof with someone like her would be impossible. She was so noisy and annoying, and now I wouldn't be able to get away from it.

Even if it was inevitable that I would be living with her, that didn't change a thing. This, I prayed, wouldn't give her hopes, because that would make this even more unbearable, and her doting on me would be intolerable.

By the end of the night, mine and Yuuki's rooms had been crammed together into one. The next morning, I was awakened by Yuuki's complaints. It was true that the room was too small for two beds, but there was no argument. There was no use in complaining.

On the way past Yuuki's old bedroom, I saw through the cracked-open door that my mother's pink bedroom collection had gone to use. Everything from the bed set to the fuzzy carpet on the floor was a ridiculously bright shade of pink. I shook my head at it.

I was all the way downstairs by the time it happened, but I heard the groan Yuuki made when he discovered his room.

I left without a word of protest about what I would come home to find after school today. As I arrived at the school gates, there was a raucous of shouts. The whining of Kotoko Aihara caught my attention.

"Kin-chan, stop this!" She cried. I spotted her and Kinnosuke Ikezawa. A collection box dangled from a strap around his neck. I'd expected so much of him, as he was even worse than Aihara when it came to being loud.

"I'm doing this to help you!" He said.

"Well, stop! It's embarrassing!" The reaction baffled me. If she was so worried about embarrassing herself, then she wouldn't have confessed to me at the school gates.

Classmates stood by and watched the scene, snickering and sharing the gossip that Aihara was cursed and to stay away from her.

As I came closer, I noticed that they were blocking the pathway. There would be no getting around them.

"Can you move?" I said in annoyance. Aihara turned a nervous, frightful eye to me. Kinnosuke didn't budge.

"Why do you think you can talk to us like that?" He said, over exaggerating his words and making himself look like a fool. It caused more people to stop what they were doing to watch.

"Kotoko is very hurt. Do you know why? Because you turned her down in such a horrible way! She's been having bad luck since then!" He said.

"Are you saying it's my fault her house collapsed?" I said slowly, trying to understand what goes on in these peoples' heads. The stupidity of such an inference confounded me.

"Kin-chan, that doesn't make any sense." Aihara said. Maybe she wasn't as dimwitted as Kinnosuke, but I still didn't want to associate with her nonetheless.

"I didn't know I had such great power." I said, playing along with his words. To speed this ordeal along, I pulled my wallet out and fished for some money. I held out a bill for Aihara to take.

"Will you move if I donate this money?" She gawked at me for a moment, but when that moment was over, she did something unexpected. She snatched me by the wrist and the money flew out of my hand.

"Don't treat me like that!" She threw my hand away, "I can't believe I ever liked someone like you. I'd die before I let you help me." I put away my wallet in irritation. So much for that. She was going to regret she said it later.

"Are you sure about that?" I said and began away from them as they cleared a way.

"Of course." I chuckled at that, though it only seemed to anger her. A Class F rushed up and handed me the money that had flown away and I shoved it into my pocket.

"Are you looking down on us because we're in Class F?" Aihara said, "Being smart is not everything! What matters is the heart!" She yelled at me, juggling with her words and struggling. Once again, I laughed. That was something dumb people said to make themselves feel better. She sure would be in for a shock later. I couldn't wait to see the panic on her face.

...

In the driveway, a small moving truck was parked. I hesitated at the front door before going in, enjoying these last few moments before Aihara living in my house was final.

Entering the house, it was hard not to hear her. She giggled and chatted. My mother sure sounded as though she was enjoying herself as well. The slow-ish, dumb way in which Aihara spoke drove me insane in ways. This was the end to a quiet, calm household.

I finally found it in me to come to the living room where everyone was seated and deal with the nuisance of introducing myself.

"I apologize for the late introduction. I'm Naoki Irie. Pleased to meet you." I said upon arrival. Aihara sprang to attention. Her eyes widened and she stared at me in shock. It was a wonder what she must've been thinking.

"I was told that Naoki and you go to the same school." My mother told Aihara and she nodded, still staring at me and clearly struck into silence. I sat in the nearest chair.

"I didn't know that. Pleased to meet you as well," Her father said, "Kotoko, you greet him, too."

She gaped at me for another moment.

"What's wrong?" Her father asked her.

"Nothing… Nice to meet you." She said airily. She was so shocked, I was surprised she hadn't fainted or done something else to cause a fuss. That was what she was good at.

My mother went to the kitchen to brew up more tea and the "introduction" continued.

"It's very lucky you two didn't get hurt yesterday." My father said to hers.

"Yes, well, if Kotoko hadn't stopped, we'd have been inside when the house collapsed." Her father said.

"That's such a close call." My father said. Aihara's dumbfounded stares transformed into glares and she sat without another word for some time. It was good to know she was quiet sometimes. I refused to look at her and I could tell it drove her nuts. But if I didn't have to acknowledge or converse with her, I would avoid it at all costs.

My mother reentered with a tea refill, "I was so happy when I found out that Kotoko and Naoki already knew each other. Are you in the same class?" I could have snorted at the assumption. The difference between me and her was so obvious.

"Our classes are actually quite far apart, but we met recently in an unexpected way. Right, Aihara?" I could read the panic that engulfed her in flames, like I was going to exploit her right there. I could have, but I didn't care to at the moment. Still, I found it funny how she cared about secrecy now, but hadn't when she exposed her feelings at the school gates.

"Well, yes…" She said.

"Great. Now you can get to know each other more." My mother said. That wouldn't be happening. I didn't want to know Aihara. She and her father could live in my house out of courtesy, but that was about as far as it would go, "Naoki is different, don't you think? Do you think you two could be friends?"

Aihara said nothing, but nodded with a slight smile, stressing away.

Yuuki came in with his homework and sat in the chair beside mine.

"I finished today's homework." He said, flipping through the pages.

"Good job." I told him.

"But there's one kanji character that I don't know how to read." He said and shot a glance over to Aihara. He already didn't like her, and I knew what he was doing right now. He was testing her. Well, he wasn't going to get very far.

"Instead of asking you, I'd like to ask Kotoko." Aihara was brought to attention again, as her mind had wandered off into some unknown place. Once more, she panicked.

"Good idea." I said and studied her reactions.

"Kotoko, can you tell me how to read this?" Yuuki said and handed her the homework. Her previous panic turned into determination, or so I could read on her expression and change of attitude. Her eyes scanned the page and any determination she'd had was gone in an instant. She couldn't even understand middle school work. How she was even in high school confused me.

Aihara hesitated to answer, going over the page again.

"Yuuki, you're amazing. You're only in third grade, but you can learn such difficult characters. Which one can't you read?" She said.

"This one." Yuuki pointed it out to her.

"Oh," She said, "You read this as 'rabbit' and 'horn'!" She answered, falsely confident and as if she knew any of what she was reading. If she didn't know how to read it, she should have just said so. It was part of what made her stupid. I shook my head at her awful, incorrect guess.

Yuuki snatched the book from her, "You're stupid. It's read 'tonikaku'. You're in high school, but you can't even read this?" He said. Yuuki was like myself in more than one way, and that was exactly what I was thinking. I couldn't contain myself, letting out a laugh.

"Yuuki, that's very rude!" My mother said. Rude as it may have been, it was true. My mother had to have seen that. And to think she wanted me to be friends with a girl like her, "Apologize."

"I won't," Yuuki said to my mother, and then he turned to Aihara, "I hate you."

"Yuuki!" My father yelled at him, but Yuuki pranced off without any concern. He stuck his tongue out at Aihara from the distance.

"Hey, you stop that!" My father corrected him.

"I'm so sorry about him." My mother said. Aihara looked to the floor.

"No. I should have been able to read it." She said. I felt partway bad for her (though only partway). To be so dumb must've been hard.

"He's not used to being around girls. I think he's just being shy. Don't take it personally." My father said, but fixing Aihara's downcasted expression would be another thing.

She nodded and smiled, radiating warmth again. Such a quick change.

"Kotoko, I would like to show you your room. I was so excited about this! Come this way, it's upstairs." My mother leapt from the couch and ushered over to Aihara, sweeping her up and out of the living room.

As they left, I took a moment to reflect on this situation. I hoped every day wasn't going to be a disaster, but I wasn't seeing a light at the end of the tunnel at the moment. As for school… no one could find out about this, or I'd be at the center of more rumors. I'd be the highlight of peoples' conversations. And there would be no escaping it, even at home, because there Aihara would be, whining about the homework she didn't understand or talking loudly or pestering me.

"Naoki," My father said after a minute, "Why don't you take those bags up to them?" He gestured at a couple of pink bags over in the entrance. I wondered why I should when she told me earlier that she would never accept my help. Still, I stood. With her father sitting right there, I didn't have it in me to object.

I took the bags by the handles and toted them up the stairs, to what should have been Yuuki's bedroom but had now been infested.

Gabbering excitedly with Aihara, my mother shone. She had always wanted a girl in the house. Now, she didn't have to pretend there was.

I sat the bags down in the doorway, interrupting my mother and Aihara's newfound friendship.

"This used to be Yuuki's room. Thanks to you, his school desk is in my room. It's so cluttered." I said. My mother groaned.

"Why do you always have to ruin the fun? Don't say unnecessary things," She said and I let out an irritated breath, "Don't worry about them, Kotoko. Just think of this as your home." My mother beamed.

"Okay." Aihara said, another dumb smile spreading across her face.

"Naoki, you should help her organize her stuff. I'm going to start preparing dinner! We're having sukiyaki. Kotoko, do you like sukiyaki?" She asked as she made her way out the door.

"Yes, I do!" Aihara said in profound happiness.

"Perfect! Well, I'll see you later." My mother practically danced out the bedroom door.

For a few seconds, the air around us was still as we were left alone. She was uncomfortable and stiff. I got it moving, the sooner to be away from her, the better.

"What should I start with?" I said, bending over to pick up the bags and bring them to the dresser. Halfway there, she tried to snatch a bag from my hand, it falling to the floor and its contents spilling.

"That's okay, I can do it myself." Awkwardly, she peered down at the things that had spilled from the bag to see the letter she'd tried to give me still existed.

"Oh yeah," I said, remembering earlier, "That's right. You'd die before you accept my help," I looked down on her, irked, "How's that working out for you?" She knelt on the floor and rushed at shoving the envelope and everything else back into the bag, a sullen look appearing on her face in place of being uncomfortable.

"It doesn't matter to me whether or not you live here," I said, finding the door, "Just don't bother me." I left her to herself.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

For breakfast, I had the delight of feeling her gaze linger over me. She watched me like a hawk. Every move I made was perceived by her. If she could focus so wholly on me, of all things, she surely could have focused on paying attention to homework and school. Yet, I didn't think that would happen any time soon. She was obviously much too absent-minded and distracted by all that went on around her.

In the attempt to shut her out, I read the newspaper and blocked my face from view. But her eyes continued to pour over me. When I couldn't take another second of it, I made the decision to leave for school early.

"I'm leaving." I said as I stood and folded the newspaper.

"Already?" My mother said, "Kotoko, why don't you go with him? You go to the same school after all." Was I really not going to be able to have a moment of peace? Couldn't my mother spare me the walk to school at least?

I footed it out the front door down the driveway, hopeful to lose Aihara on the way to school. Arriving with her would be awful, especially if she insisted on talking during the walk.

She ushered to catch up to me, that grin plastered on her face. Quickly, I thought up some boundaries.

"Do you mind-" I said and tensed when she interrupted me.

"Yes?"

"Walk back there." The grin didn't disappear. Her enjoyment over this annoyed me.

"Why?"

"I don't want to walk with you." The grin vanished. She stopped for a second. I turned around to face her.

"Stay at least two meters back. Follow me and remember the path to school. And don't tell anyone that we live in the same house. Got it?" I said, my words cold, "Don't talk to me at school, either."

"You don't have to be that mean." Aihara said. What she didn't understand in that useless brain of hers was that, yes, I did. Otherwise, she would never leave me alone.

"I don't want to be involved in any more worthless rumors."

"But…"

"I hate girls who don't have a brain, so you should just stop this now." I said. My words seemed to cut through her and her eyes fell. Dejectedly and without another word, she followed me to school.

Once or twice during the trip, I checked behind me to be sure she wasn't gradually coming closer. She didn't. Instead, she stayed as far back as she could. Rather than being upset, she seemed frustrated and angry, a good thing. Maybe if she hated me, she would stop with this stupid crush of hers.

At the entrance, I took quicker steps to be away from her, because it wouldn't take more than arriving with her to ignite fallacies.

In a second, I didn't have to worry about her at all, because Kinnosuke took it from there, taking his claim to her and wrapping his arm around her shoulder. It was too bad Aihara hadn't taken to him instead of me since they were so alike, both from Class F. She shouldn't have been aiming as high as she was, so it was her fault if she got hurt when she fell back down to her level where she should have been in the first place.

"I've never seen a real life love triangle before." I heard a girl whisper to her friend. If it wasn't for having common sense, I'd have corrected her that there was no "love triangle" if there was no love involved. But I was above that.

I walked to Class A, not caring to pay any more attention to Aihara, though perturbed at the latest piece of gossip I'd just heard. No matter what I did, I was going to be involved in this. God only knew what would happen if the school found out we were living together.

The rest of Class A and I studied without hindrance until lunch, diligently finishing homework as we did every school day.

As we ate, Kinnosuke partook in his routine loudness out in the hall, Aihara probably nearby. But I didn't hear her once. Was it possible she was studying?

"What's wrong with her, anyway?" Kinnosuke whined, "I tell you, there's something weird going on in that house she moved into! What if they're using her as a servant?"

I sighed at his words… so, so dense. People didn't do that kind of thing these days.

"I wonder where the house is…" Kinnosuke began saying, but it became hard of hearing as he travelled farther away from Class A. I was thankful for that. His voice was nauseating and childish. But he wouldn't be learning where my house was. Aihara had to be careful or she would unwittingly lead those idiots there. It was enough to have one idiot in the house, but to have Kinnosuke and his friends visiting or spying was way more than unappealing.

After lunch and for the rest of the day, I didn't hear a word from Aihara. It was almost as though she'd left school. She talked so often that to not have heard her was a shock.

The school bells rang and I gathered together my materials, slinging my bag over my shoulder to leave. I was the last out of the classroom and the halls were filled with students, though particularly the higher-classified ones. The lower-classified students like Classes E, D, and F always evacuated the school in a swarm. It was their least favorite place to be any day.

One unusual voice did catch my attention, however. Aihara recited formulas over and over, a math book open in one hand while the other carried her bag. She fumed over the book, biting her lip and lines forming on her forehead. She headed toward the center of Tonan instead of the doors to leave… headed toward the library.

In her own little focused zone, she shuffled right by me. Whatever her problem was, I was happy not to be a part of it. The house would be almost like normal when I got home. I would have some peace.

...

Even more suspiciously, Aihara was noiseless for hours after coming home, in the same state she had been in when making her way to the library after school. She secluded herself off in "her" bedroom and studied. And judging from how many times I heard her slam a book shut or sigh, it wasn't going too well.

Not my problem. I thought as I remembered that all of my homework was finished. Even if she wasn't getting very far, she was staying away from me and I liked that. The longer it took her to study, the more time I had to myself.

When dinner came, I dragged myself out of my bedroom to face Aihara while eating. When she emerged at the table, her hair was a mess as though she'd been physically pulling it from its roots in frustration. This showed me another aspect about her I couldn't stand. She didn't know her limits.

Everyone started eating.

"Mrs. Irie, this is so good!" Aihara commented straight away, "I wish I knew how to cook like this." She took another bite, closing her eyes to enjoy it. But I couldn't imagine what her cooking would taste like… maybe something a weird and disgusting mix of burned and undercooked with either too much salt or too little.

"I'll have to teach you sometime! I'll take you on as an apprentice." My mother said. I let out a defeated breath, closing my eyes for a moment. That would mean inedible dinners some nights. I didn't want to be here to witness it on those nights. I didn't even want to be here now, listening to Aihara's high-pitched, child-like voice.

Aihara seemed to be in an overall refreshed mood, at least until she spotted me. Her expression distorted into something fierce.

She ate her food quickly.

"Thanks for the food," She said, standing, "Exams are coming up and I have to study for them. Excuse me."

"She's so dedicated." My mother said in awe once Aihara had left the table. The only thing that came to my mind was that there had to be a reason for her sudden studying. Maybe she'd gotten the message that she was slow and needed to work harder because of it… or maybe she was working harder to catch my attention. If that was the case, it wasn't going to work. It was not only that she was dumb that I harbored animosity toward her. She was loud, much too pushy and out there, and she was annoyingly happy. I couldn't deal with those kinds of people, whether they were Class F or not. But the fact that she was made it worse. She was also a huge distraction and pain.

With her studying so soundly, I was able to get some rest. I went to bed for the night.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

The next morning, Aihara couldn't stop giggling for some reason. She sat at breakfast, her face red from laughing under her breath.

"Good _morning_." She said as I took my seat at the table, as though she knew a secret. But I couldn't have cared less.

 _I don't even want to know what it's about_. I thought as I went about my own business. Her giggling ensued. I shot her an irked glance, though it only seemed to make it harder for her to contain herself.

"Kotoko, what's wrong? Are you feeling well?" Her father asked her.

She swallowed her laughter for a second to answer, "No, I'm alright. Never mind."

"Maybe she studied too much and cracked." Yuuki said to me. Aihara's mouth became a thin line, but then she peered back over to me and another snicker escaped her.

" _Maybe_." She said through her laughter. It was so odd. I couldn't wrap my mind around her.

 _What_? I thought at her. I ground my teeth together and picked up the newspaper to ignore her.

At the end of breakfast, my mother handed me and Aihara our lunch boxes to send us on our way. Like the day before, I went ahead of Aihara. If she knew the way, then she didn't have to follow me to school.

Still, she caught up and followed those two meters or so behind, not saying a word though it was clear how amused she was. It was enough to make me want to turn around and snap at her to stop it.

I walked faster, immensely agitated and rubbing my neck to keep from tensing up. I arrived to Tonan before Aihara did, though she made it to school perfectly fine without me. Why was it that she had to follow me, again?

Oh, right.

It was because she had such a thing for me that she couldn't lose the precious time. And my mother was encouraging it. My instincts told me that my mother somehow knew of Aihara's infatuation. If she did, no good would be coming from it since she'd taken such a liking for Aihara. I could see it now… my mother and her plotting the ways in which they could get me to have any sort of loving feeling toward Aihara.

The thought of those two scheming maddened me. It was too bad there wasn't a way to separate them before such ideas came to their minds.

Class A and I studied through the first half of today's lessons, undistracted. And like every other day, we completed our homework.

For lunch I pulled my lunch box from my bag. Noticing it was lighter than usual, I looked down to find it was a light shade of pink. The wrong lunch box.

Watanabe caught sight of it, "What happened to your old lunch box?" He asked. I let out an irritated breath and pinched the bridge of my nose. I could see right through it. My mother knew. She had this planted so I would be forced to see Aihara to exchange the lunch boxes. And I wasn't being paranoid either. I knew my mother too well for that.

"It's not mine." I said to Watanabe, shoving the lunch box back into my bag and dangling it over my shoulder, "I'll be right back." I made my way to the door.

"But if it's not yours, then whose is it?" He said. That was one question I couldn't answer. Watanabe wasn't one to spread news, so I was sure I could've trusted him, but I couldn't risk someone overhearing.

I paced down the hallway and down two flights of stairs to Class F. I paused before the door, readying myself for the reaction by Class F when I tear Aihara away from them.

Appearing in the doorway, I remained neutral.

"Aihara." I said. She sprang to attention from studying. Every set of eyes from Class F stared me down dead.

"Naoki Irie," Kinnosuke said with disgust and took stance in front of Aihara, as if to protect her from me, "How dare you speak to Kotoko?" He looked like he would've been ready to fight me. Such foolish, rash behavior.

"Aihara, can you get your bag and come with me?" I said, ignoring Kinnosuke. He wasn't worth the time. Befuddled, she nodded.

"Yes." She said and gathered her bag up off the floor. I began down the hallway, knowing she would catch up. Whispers peppered the air of Classroom F behind me.

I brought her as far away from Class F as I could, leading her all the way outside and to the back of the building where I was sure no one would see.

When I stopped, she swung around in front of me, questions in her eyes. There was a sliver of foundationless hope behind it.

"What is it?" She asked. I opened my bag and pulled out the lunch box.

"This. My mother gave us the wrong ones." She tugged her own bag open.

"Oh, you're right." We switched the lunches.

"If your nosey classmates saw this, it would cause a commotion." She nodded slightly and I closed my bag.

"Such an inconvenience. It's so confusing because we go to the same school." I said, giving my mother the benefit of the doubt, that maybe she'd gotten it wrong by mistake.

A devilish smile crossed Aihara.

"Really," She said, "You might even mistake my uniform for yours and wear it to school." The statement left me confused.

"Why would I do that?" I said. There was no telling what she was thinking. A small giggle escaped her throat.

"Only because you grew up wearing a skirt, didn't you?" She said. My heart stopped. I stood there stunned into silence as she fished into her front pocket.

The picture she produced snapped me back into reality.

"Ta-da!" She said as she flashed a picture of me as a young toddler. I'd known this would come back to haunt me someday. How badly I'd wanted to discard of all those pictures, but my mother wouldn't let me, even resorting to hiding them. I'd searched the house from top to bottom and I never found the albums, so how had she?

And this picture was one of the worst. A frilly pink gown dressed me, white flowers decorating my hair.

"Where did you get that?" I said. Aihara smiled down at the picture.

"Your mother gave it to me." I cringed.

 _Why did she do that?_ I asked myself. My mother knew how I felt about those pictures, yet she risked the secret being exposed to the entire student body by sharing it with someone so careless as Aihara.

"Can you give it back?" I held out my hand for it. As soon as I got my hands on that thing, I would shred it without any second thoughts.

"No." She said and looked at me in such a way that it was almost a tease. It angered me and I reached for the picture to take it from her.

"Just give it back." She darted out of the way.

"No, I won't," Again, I reached for it, but she hurriedly tucked it back into her pocket, "You've been so mean to me. Sometimes I can be mean, too." I gave up, a headache forming right at my temples. It sickened me to know that such a picture was in her hands and that it was up to her if she wanted to share it with others.

"I didn't know geniuses could have weaknesses," She flashed a goofy smile and dread filled me to the brim, "I can give it back to you with one condition."

 _Is she seriously trying to blackmail me?_ I thought. Less than a week knowing her and she was already the biggest nightmare I'd ever encountered.

"Help me study for exams for a week." I stared at her for a second.

" _Me_ help _you_ study for exams?" It was impossible. My brain would explode. I wouldn't be able to handle her for so long even without the studying.

She nodded sharply, "How about this… If I get into the top 100 list, you can have it back." It was even more impossible than the last proposition. Delusions like these could only come from Class F… the only class that didn't know what they could and could not do.

"I don't think so." I gave up on the hope of ever getting the picture back and maybe being humiliated in front of the entire school some day soon, and all because my mother refused to buy boys' clothes rather than girls' when I was little.

The amusement was wiped from her face, "Why?" She pouted.

"It would be a waste of time to challenge the impossible," I snapped. What did she think would come out of it? A miracle? "Someone as stupid as you would never make it into the top 100 list."

"Okay," she said, reaching into her pocket, "Then I'll just show this picture to-"

"Wait a minute." I said in a rush, reaching over to grab the picture if she should present it again. She taunted me with it like bait, to reel me in and get me to comply with her blackmail. All the while, a grin stretched across her face.

"Fine," I said. Happily, her eyes widened, "Starting today, I'll help you every night for a week." It would be the end of me. She would kill me by overworking, trying to get her to understand math equations she'd never fully understand and speak broken English.

"Yay!" She said, beaming brightly.

"But I won't cut you any slack, got it?" She came back down from her high, "People in the top 100 are from Class A and B. You are aware of how hard it'll be to put a student from Class F on it, right?" She nodded, becoming more serious.

"Good. See you tonight." I said dejectedly, already feeling the frustration of teaching someone like her. I left her behind to walk back to class and she skipped off a moment later.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

All throughout dinner, Aihara was ecstatic. She kept gazing my way and becoming lost in thought, probably off in some fantastical wonderland because we would be studying together. What she seemed to be forgetting was that she'd forced me into this. It wasn't going to be as pleasant of a night as she might have been imagining up.

The chatting was minimal, though Aihara actually came back to earth once my mother spoke to her.

"Kotoko, would you like for me to make you another snack tonight?" My mother asked.

"Yes, thank you." Aihara said, revealing a wide smile. No matter what, she was always this way, wasn't she? Just happy. Either that or too vacuous to be unhappy.

Well, I thought, may as well make sure my mother doesn't have a heart attack about me studying when she brings a snack.

"Do you think you could make snacks for two?" I said. She gave me a look of complete shock and Yuuki seemed betrayed. My father stared like he'd hallucinated. To be fair, I never had studied at home before. I'd never needed to.

"For two?" She said, "You're going to study?"

"That's right." I said. My mother looked like she was going to have a stroke.

"You're helping her, but not me? That's not fair!" Yuuki complained, "Can you help me, too?"

"You don't need my help. You're already at the top of your class." I pointed out and Yuuki glared at Aihara. I took my last bite of food, "Let's get started." I told Aihara. She hurried up and swallowed down the last morsels of her food and stood.

"Thank you for the dinner. It was delicious." She tripped over pushing the chair in and sloppily came over to me. We climbed the stairs.

At her door, I lingered back for her to enter first. It took her a moment to figure out what I was doing.

"Please, come in." She said, leading me in.

As if I have a choice.

I closed the door behind us and she gestured at the stack of homework and textbooks. There was so much to do. This night was going to be a long one.

"What should we start with? What do you need the most help with?" I said, buckling down for a lot of frustration. I was ready.

"Math, probably." She said.

"Okay. Get the book." She fumbled about with the stack of books, looking for the math textbook, though I could see it right clearly in front of her face. She was such a scatterbrain. I got it for her and took a seat at her homework desk.

"What chapters are going to be on the test?" I said, opening the book to see what we were working with.

"Chapters? It's the same as yours." Aihara said.

"I don't know mine. I just do whatever is on the test." She gaped at me like I was a living, breathing impossibility. And then she flipped open a notebook.

"It goes up to page forty."

"I see." I said. I went over the pages. She took a seat next to me at the desk and sat silently, stiff.

"Do you have a pen?" She reached for a silly-looking, oversized pen and handed it over to me.

 _Only she would have this ridiculous kind of pen._

"Alright," I said, flipping to certain pages of the book, "Then we're going to have this," I made a mark next to a checkpoint, "This," I made another mark and flipped through.

"How do you know that?" Aihara asked.

"These are the important points." I made another mark.

"May I ask how you usually study?" She said.

"I can remember what I read or hear once. I don't study." Her hopefulness of learning some kind of secret studying pattern dissolved. She wanted to learn to be intelligent. The problem with that was that you were either born with it or you weren't. She wasn't. Not even a little.

"I'll give you some math problems to solve." I took her notebook and used her gaudy pen to scribble down a basic math problem she would need to know to be in the top 100 this mid-year.

"If you can understand this, you can get at least eighty percent of the test correct." I said and handed her the notebook.

She got a pen and glanced over the problem. I could almost hear her resolve snap in half as I studied her reaction. She didn't understand a word of it. We were going to have to start from scratch.

Aihara peered over at me, helplessly confused. I sighed, "What is it that you do in class all day? I want to look inside your brain." I leaned my elbow on the desk, my head propped up in my palm. I was determined not to become frustrated, but she was making it so hard. We'd been learning this for months. How could she not know anything about how to solve it?

"Sorry." She said and focused on the problem, lines forming on her forehead.

"Well, don't make your brain explode. We have to start from basics." I opened the textbook to the chapter we needed… chapter one. Making up the simplest problem I could think of, I handed her the notebook once more. If she could at least get this problem, we could get somewhere meaningful tonight. To be honest, there was so much work to be done, I wasn't sure it was possible to accomplish in a short week.

"Ah," She said, much to my relief, "I think I understand this one." She scratched down an answer. What she handed me back was horrifying.

"How did it turn out like this?" I asked. Not even I could comprehend the method she'd taken to get this answer, "Where did you use the formula?"

"Formula?" Aihara said and tucked her hair behind her ear. I knew it was too good to be true, "What was it again?" When she said that, I almost threw in the towel and left. Instead, I sighed. We began to construct her knowledge on this basic, simple formula.

For hours, she was hardworking, listening intently to what I said and memorizing the steps to the math problems. When she was focused, I noticed that she was like a Spartan. Nothing was going to stop her tonight. What was more, I did my best not to snap at her or become frustrated when she didn't understand. I had to be the best teacher I could be or I wouldn't be getting my picture back from Aihara.

It was around midnight when my mother came in with a snack. The door flew open. My mother hauled in a tray of food, like a second dinner. It was too much, but I could see she was excited about me studying.

Aihara cleared a space for the tray to be set down, "It looks so good! Thanks, Mrs. Irie." She grinned despite having had a pretty big issue with a math problem three seconds ago.

"You're welcome. How's the studying going?" She shot me a funny glance, like she was getting ideas. I paid no attention to the look and started drawing a graph for planning out Aihara's study schedule.

"Perfectly fine." I said.

"Okay, then I'll leave you to it. Bye-bye." She waved as she backed out of the room and closed the door.

"Goodnight." Aihara said and beamed. She ate some as I worked out a schedule. Producing it after a few minutes, I held it up for her to read.

"You must follow this schedule. Keep your vocabulary book with you at all times, even when you're taking a bath." For the millionth time tonight, that determined look crossed her face. It gave me at least a little hope that I would be getting the picture back. Though I doubted it. She may have had the will, but she was in Class F for a reason.

"Yes. Right. You got it." She said and took the schedule from me to tape up on the wall.

"We have no time to be chatting. You have to remember all the math formulas by the end of the night." I said. She looked pained by the thought.

"It's passed midnight." Aihara said.

 _Don't you dare complain. You wanted this._

"Then you'll just have to work faster." I said. It was almost three in the morning when I was permitted to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

I was a wreck at school the next day, completely sleep-deprived. It was a wonder how Aihara had any energy, but it seemed as though she'd made flash cards after I left last night. She'd studied them under the table during breakfast and during the walk to school. She was so driven it was almost admirable.

During school, she was mute other than the reciting of formulas and English vocabulary words that I heard when she was out in the halls. I was happy she was sticking to the plan, because the more time she studied on her own, the less time I had to spend helping her.

While I was pleased with it, Kinnosuke whined about it.

"She's like a zombie! What's happened to her?" I could recall hearing. Kinnosuke would've known what had happened to her if he'd ever put any effort into studying. But he never would. For a brief moment, I wondered how he would react if he found out Aihara and I were living together. How noisy he would be, moaning and complaining. All the more reason to keep it a secret.

At dinner that night, my mother kept eyeing Aihara and I. It was getting to be annoying, so I quickened my meal.

"Eat. We need to get started early today." I told Aihara as she shovelled food into her mouth and went through her flash cards.

"Right." She said in between bites. She almost wasn't the same person anymore. Almost. But she still smiled a lot and enjoyed the food my mother made. I appreciated that she was sticking to her end of the deal. She may have been demanding, but she was cooperative.

We finished up quickly.

"I'll make you two another snack tonight," My mother said to Aihara as we left, "Good luck with your studying."

"Thanks!" Aihara said, smiling warmly.

She led the way to her bedroom where we resumed from the night before. Dumping school books onto her bed, she reached for the English book. Today's designated subject. There was no way English would be as hard for her as math.

I was sadly mistaken. She couldn't pronounce any of the words without a heavy accent, and she didn't even know what they meant.

"Try again," I ordered, "Loosen up or you'll never get it." Aihara filled her cheeks with air and nodded sharply.

"In- _ten-_ tional." She tried, dragging out the syllables. It was better.

"What's the meaning?" I said.

"Um…" She bit her lip and thought. I remained patient.

"On purpose." I answered for her.

"Oh, right! On purpose." She repeated.

I grabbed a journal and jotted down a list of vocabulary words for her, writing the meanings down next to them.

"You should make more flash cards out of these. Study them thoroughly." She took the list and her eyes scanned over the words. I went over them with her until my mother came in with the snacks.

This time, she toted in a large tray _and_ her camera. That thing was constantly glued to her hand. It was no wonder there were so many pictures of me dressed up… the way she dressed me up as a kid. As said before, there were albums full, and not just one or two, but four painful albums of it.

My mother snapped a picture of Aihara studying the list of words, and then one of me becoming cross.

"Get closer, you two! I want to take a picture of you together." She swished her hand in the air.

"No thanks." I said. Aihara looked disappointed.

"Oh, come on, Onii-chan. Don't be a spoilsport." I huffed and moved an inch closer to Aihara. It seemed to please my mother enough. She took the picture and left.

"Do good work!" She said on the way out.

Aihara went for the snacks on the bed. Since today's studying wasn't going to need to be as rigorous as yesterday's, I chose to take a break. Aihara took a big bite out of a rice ball. I grabbed one as well. While I was predisposed to rest my mind for a few minutes, she would do no such thing. She studied the English words while eating, saying them over and over. This was one of the few methods that worked for her. She wasn't so lucky as to just hear something to remember it. She had to repeat it to herself. I was going deaf to the sound of it, blocking it out for the chance it vexed me too much.

I watched her as she studied. One would've thought she needed to be on that list or it was the death of her. With the route she was going, it might've been the death of her even if she did make the list.

She went to war with the English, unwavering. Maybe I would have a chance after all.

She stopped for a moment.

"It might seem weird to you that I want to do this out of nowhere," Aihara said, eyes still trained on the list, "But no one will ever take a stupid person serious. I have to."

"Keep working, then. You won't get on the list by talking." I said. She looked up to me, smiling so hard that her cheeks turned rosy from her lips tugging at them.

"Okay, Irie-kun."

I helped her for another hour and left her to study on her own. Thankfully, I was able to get more sleep than the night before.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

It was the last night of the blackmail-induced study lessons. All Aihara seemed to do this last week was study and carry around flash cards. At that rate, she would more than pass the exams, but making onto the top 100 list was going to take more. I only hoped she was up for it. There was no way I worked with her so hard all week for her to not make it and me not get that abomination-of-a-picture returned.

Sitting at her desk for the last time, we went over everything we'd already covered. We'd gone through every subject so far. After that, I made her up a few practice tests.

"Take this test." I said to Aihara as I set a sheet of paper down before her. She got right to answering questions.

"Wow," She said, astounded, "I can answer these." Another child-like, giddy smile spread across her lips.

"Just do it. There are tests for the other subjects as well." I set the small pile of papers down on the desk.

"Right." She got back to work.

For hours more, I hovered over her taking the tests and corrected mistakes she made. When she was done, I would grade them.

It became quite late. Drowsily, I laid my head on my arm as she answered questions. I slipped into a blissful, hour-long sleep. When I woke, I found the remainder of the tests complete and Aihara asleep. It wasn't a surprise. She should have been tired considering all the work she did this week and all the sleep she'd lost because of it.

For a weird second, I thought she was kind of cute. When she was peaceful and quiet, out cold from all this studying. It was something I'd never paid mind to before… whether or not a girl was cute. It was different.

Not caring about where I was anymore, I fell back asleep.

…

Waking to early morning light, I found a blanket draped over my shoulders. Aihara was gone, but the tests remained so I lingered to grade them. They were good. She would definitely be ready for the exams today.

Downstairs, Aihara stood in the kitchen, making coffee and wearing a bright smile that brought color to her face.

"Good morning," She said when she saw me, "I made coffee. Would you like some?" I nodded and seated myself. I still hadn't gotten enough sleep last night and there was a crick in my neck from where I'd slept.

Aihara poured two cups and came to sit with me. Taking the first sip, I realized it was good coffee. Correction: it might've been the best coffee I'd tasted in a while. It didn't need milk or sugar, and it was exactly the right degree of warm.

Aihara and I drank in absolute muteness. An hour later and I was ready to go. I went to the front door to put on my shoes. Aihara followed, as always.

"I'm leaving." Aihara said and my mother appeared in the entrance.

"Kotoko, wait," she said and ran over to Aihara, holding out a colorful envelope, "Take this." Aihara accepted and started to open it.

"What is it?"

My mother stopped her, "Don't open it yet. Wait until you reach the top 100. Until then, it's a good luck charm." Aihara's face shone.

"Thank you very much." She said and slid it into her bag.

"It's only mid-terms." I said. Those two liked to make a fuss about little things. There was so much they became excited about. I didn't see the point in it.

"I'm really grateful for this charm, but I should get going. Bye." Aihara said and followed me out the door.

"See you later." My mother called and closed the door.

During the walk to school, Aihara and I went over her flash cards. We reviewed the pronunciation of some English words and their meanings.

"What is 'so far' in English?" I said. Aihara was walking closer than I normally would've allowed, but she needed to be able to hear me. Still a little heavy on the accent, she said it.

"'In other words'?" I asked. This one was a bit easier on her.

"What does 'intentional' mean?"

"What?" She said. My English was better than hers by far. Of course she wouldn't have understood it.

" _Intentional_ ," I said in annoyance, "What does it mean?" She hesitated.

"Um… it means… on purpose?" She said, "On purpose." We neared the school.

"Remember to be at least two meters behind me when we get to the school." Aihara scrunched up her nose.

"Alright."

At school, we went our separate ways. I passed her on the stairway going to class, exams about to begin.

"Thank you." She said in a low whisper.

"Good luck." I told her back and continued to class.

For the rest of the day, exams consumed the school.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

After three days, Tonan's mid-year exams finished up. Aihara bounded from the school at the end of the day, her friends tailing her. Watanabe and I came through the doors, not far behind.

"We're done!" Aihara celebrated, "Let's go have some fun!"

"Let's go!" Her friends shouted in agreement. They were so needlessly loud.

"We're coming, too!" Kinnosuke skipped up to Aihara's side with his two moron sidekicks. His voice peeved me more every time I heard it.

Kinnosuke wrapped his arm around Aihara's shoulders in a tight hug, walking off with her, "I won't let you go." He said as she struggled with him.

"Come on! Let _go_." She said.

"I won't. I haven't done anything with you lately, so I'm not letting you go today even once." Aihara laughed and smiled.

"Ah," she gave in, "I guess it's okay. But, hey… where are we going?"

"Leave it up to me. Let's go to the cafe." Kinnosuke said and they herded out of the school gates ahead of Watanabe and I.

"Huh," Watanabe said, "Didn't she tell you she loved you? And she's already dating someone else." Were they dating? Kinnosuke sure seemed to wish they were, but I wasn't so sure about Aihara. If she'd changed her mind, I supposed that was good.

"It's not my business." I said.

"That's what I thought," Watanabe said, "By the way, people from Class A are going to the cafe. Do you want to come?" I thought for a moment. I would usually decline, and that was where Class F students were headed so I'd just overheard. Funnily, I didn't think it would be a bad idea. I was beginning to find Aihara rather entertaining to watch.

"I guess not, right?" Watanabe said.

"I think I'll come this time." I said.

"What? Are you serious?" I watched as Aihara and her friends travelled farther away. She stumbled over her own feet and a half smile dressed my mouth.

"You've never done anything like this in all three years here."

"At times, I've thought it could be fun." I said. That was a lie. I'd never thought of it before now as anything I'd be interested in. But there was a first for everything.

"Then let's go." Watanabe said, utterly shocked.

We caught up with a group of five other Class A's and followed behind Aihara and her group of Class F's on the way to the cafe. Though we were rather far behind them, I could still hear portions of their conversations because they were such a raucous bunch.

"My only plans are to marry you, Kotoko!" Was one specific statement I heard from Kinnosuke in the distance. It was one thing I could never understand… how a person could be so set on another that they revolve their life around that person.

"I hope those Class F's aren't going to the cafe. They'll ruin it." Hikari said. She was the highest-scoring girl in Tonan, always right behind me on the top 100 list.

When Aihara and the others turned into the cafe ahead of us, Hikari simply sighed. Another minute and the seven of us also turned into the little cafe. By the time we entered, Aihara and her friends were already seated at booths along the window. She was so busy with her friends that she didn't take notice of me or anyone else from Class A. I'd have known if she had.

We travelled to the back of the cafe where we sat at a table. A waiter brought menus.

"Ugh," Hikari said, "Isn't she that shameless girl who confessed to you?" She glanced back at Aihara, her disgust transparent.

I laid my chin in the palm of my hand and studied the menu, disinterested in this topic.

"She is," Watanabe said, "But do you see that guy next to her? She's already got another boyfriend." I knew better than to come to that conclusion. Stupid or not, Aihara didn't date for the sake of dating.

"I don't know…" Hikari said, "Look at the way she's leaning away from him a little." She was right. Aihara was leaning slightly away from Kinnosuke, but only slightly. And that didn't make any difference in the fact that his arm had snaked its way over her shoulders once again. I resigned to watching them, but everyone else moved on and away from the subject.

Aihara and her friends, the two girls (whatever their names were), conversed animatedly. One of her friends' eyes became big and said something in excitement, to which Aihara bounced up and down in her seat and laughed. Even from here, I could see the color on her face from all the smiling she'd been doing.

Aihara said something, gesturing and posing in a silly way. The movement caused a half-full glass of water to tip over. She grabbed at it, splashing water over the table and on herself.

I chuckled breathily and shook my head.

"What is it, Irie?" Another of my classmates, Wada, said. He glanced over to the booths.

"Nothing." I said. It really was nothing. They wouldn't have found it interesting, as it was just Aihara being clumsy yet again.

"How do you think you did on the exams?" Hikari asked Yoshida, "Think you beat me yet?" The competition was quite high within Class A. The students there always strived to do better and bump up on the top 100 list.

"You sure are confident. I would watch out if I were you, because I may very well take second place this time." Yoshida said. No, he wouldn't. No matter what he did, he was always behind Hikari, even if only by a point.

"Hah." Hikari said. I found it funny how, no matter the competition, everyone only ever aimed as high as second place. There was no beating my consistently perfect score, so to them, second place was the place to be. Just below me by a few points. Second place was bragging rights, though it went to Hikari every year.

Since this conversation didn't concern me and I wasn't in the race to get a better score, I went back to watching the Class F's. The lot of them were so lively. Their energy and blissfulness was unreal, despite how many of them (especially Kinnosuke) must have failed the exams.

They were without a care. It was so annoying, yet it amused me.

Kinnosuke said something, causing Aihara to stick out her tongue at him. She giggled and he stared at her in mock scandalization. And then he leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. Aihara frowned at him.

I looked away, becoming piqued with Kinnosuke the more I watched him. Every stunt he pulled was stupid and it was like he had no control over his own actions or words. He was like a five year old. I couldn't stand to see another second of his foolishness.

My group and I ordered food and drinks. As time went on, my mood took a turn. The others talked about their scores and portions of the exams, Hikari and Yoshida at each other's necks that they would claim second place.

Aihara and her group left before us. The cafe quieted down with them gone, the calm after a storm. Even Hikari and Yoshida gave up on arguing.

We ate our food and left.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

One week later, and the exam results would be out. This morning, the top 100 list would be posted for all to see. It was the moment of truth.

The list was the first place I went when I got to Tonan. I normally never checked because I had no reason to. I already knew my score. It wasn't to my score that I went, but to the end of the list. If Aihara had made this list at all, she would have to have been at the bottom somewhere.

And at the very bottom, in the one hundredth place, was Aihara. She'd scored surprisingly well. A half-smiled graced my lips. I was impressed. I could imagine that if she only tried harder, she could bump up a class or two.

I watched as Aihara bumbled her way through the crowd. She checked the very top of the list and a look of relief crossed her. Concerned about my score, was she? Well, she should have been, considering how many nights I stayed up late to help her.

She found me in the crowd, "Congratulations on being in first place again. You got a perfect score." She beamed, genuinely happy for me.

"Congrats to you, too." I said.

"What?" A mix of confusion and disbelief set over her.

"You didn't see?"

Aihara slipped back into the crowd and checked the list again. Some of the students of higher classes stared at her, dead hating that a Class F had scored higher than them. She gaped at her score, and then when it hit her that she had made the list, the widest smile I'd ever seen spread across her mouth.

"One hundredth?" She squealed, "Seriously?" She jumped up and down jovially. She rushed over to where I stood.

"One hundredth place! I'm so happy!" She said with a laugh. I held out my hand for the picture, assuming she knew she had to return it now. That was the deal.

Instead, she took my hand in hers and shook it, "Great work." I shrugged out of her hand.

"No," I said, "Return that… thing."

"Oh," she reached into her pocket and yanked out the picture, "You mean this?" She said with a tacky smile. I snatched it from her.

"Don't show it for everyone to see," I peered around to check that no one had seen, "I've told you so many times already. Don't talk to me at school." I tucked the picture deep into my pocket to incinerate later and turned to leave her and go to class.

"Hey, Irie-kun," She said. I turned to face her, annoyed for the millionth time in two weeks, "It's important to know what you can and can't do. But if you have strength of mind and persi…" She struggled with the word.

"You mean 'persistence'?" I said, "'If you have strength of mind and persistence, you will succeed at the end'." Aihara nodded and giggled.

"So, you already knew the rest of it… that so-and-so Chesterfield's quote." She grinned a dazzling smile at me. One thing I could say about her was that she had the brightest smile, and she used it all the time. She had to have been the happiest person I'd met in my life. It was somewhat contagious, and it was hard not to let a smile play at the corners of my mouth.

"Of course." I started off towards class.

"Thank you so much, Irie-kun!" She called after me. Right after I'd told her not to talk to me at school, too. But I guessed I hadn't expected her to abide by that rule too well.

I continued on to class, where for hours, the picture in my pocket was a burden. The news of a Class F making it onto the top 100 list circulated the school. Aihara was the center of some good gossip for once, though the students who had sour grapes over it speculated she'd cheated somehow.

"There's no way she made it onto that list without help." Hikari said after everyone had completed their homework. She had made second place again. Yoshida wasn't too happy about that.

"Where would she have gotten it from, then? She'd have needed help from a professional, and I doubt she did." Wada said to her.

"I don't know. It's so suspicious. And who's to say she didn't weasel her way onto that list for Irie to notice her?" I could have told them everything myself, from how she got on the list to why. But that would have blown everything wide open, and it would have been best if they didn't know.

During this class time, normally used for studying independently, Kinnosuke and his friends migrated to the hallways and did nothing useful. I could hear them talking, and Kinnosuke whining. One would have thought he would be happy for Aihara, but he was only suspicious.

"There is something weird going on at that new house of hers!" He complained. Any time I heard him, a comment or two about Aihara's living arrangements slipped in. It must have been eating him inside out that he hadn't been informed of where she was living.

For his sake and my own, it needed to stay that way. But with Kinnosuke becoming increasingly agitated at not knowing, Aihara had better have been extra careful not to lead him there.

Kinnosuke went back to class after a while and I got on mighty fine without hearing his wailing.

At the end of the day, I walked home with only one thing on my mind: the picture. It was burning a mental hole in my pocket.

Without paying much attention to my surroundings and with my mind only on one thing, I took to the house, and then to my bedroom. There, I shredded the picture to bits, sprinkling them into the waste bin. I could relax about this embarrassing secret not being discovered. At least one nightmare was over with.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

Aihara avoided me the day after, and it appeared she was still doing so today. It was strange, but I wasn't complaining. At home, she refused to look my way and she stayed put in her room. At school, she walked quickly to class rather than lingering behind to talk to her friends like she usually did.

Today on the walk to school, she walked well behind me and not edging the two-yard border I'd drawn. Weird.

On the way into Tonon, I was fixed with a fair amount of stares.

A trio of girls snuck peeks at me and giggled. Aihara scurried on ahead of me and darted for the stairs, going straight for class. Again, weird. For a second day straight she wasn't chatting it up with her friends before class. This wasn't sitting right with me. She constantly came up with excuses to talk to or bug me at home and at school. If she was avoiding me, there must have been a good reason. And speaking of her friends, I couldn't find a single one of them around me.

More people caught fleeting glimpses of me as I made my way to class. Their gazes agitated me. What was it now? Another rumor I'd been caught in the middle of? It wouldn't have surprised me. Ever since I'd met Aihara, it was one disaster after the next. I never knew what I could expect from day to day.

Watanabe caught up to me on the way up the stairs.

"Hey," he said, catching his breath, "Why didn't you tell me?" I blinked, thinking.

"Tell you what?" I said.

"That girl is living in your house, right? The one who confessed to you?" I felt all of the blood leave my face, "You didn't know, huh? It's going all around Tonan. There's a billboard downstairs with a picture of you two on it."

I froze in panic, then I whipped around and started back down the stairs. Hearing some sort of announcement coming from the next hall over, I footed it.

As I came closer, I heard my name coming out of the mouths of the announcers. Dread washed over me entirely. How did they know?

 _Aihara…_ I thought, seething. So, this had been the reason she was avoiding me. Guilt.

"Naoki Irie and Kotoko Aihara living in the same house together!"

I sped up. At the scene, I was disgusted. Did these people really have nothing better to do with their school time?

Aihara's two friends stood shouting and waving papers around, all with a photocopied picture on it. This picture… I remembered the exact night. As for how the picture has been taken, my mother had to have had something to do with it. It was of me and Aihara asleep on the desk on that last night before the exams.

Then I spotted the billboard. A large copy of the picture was stuck in the center of the board, little tissue paper hearts surrounding it. Above it, in big, bold letters, read " **NAOKI IRIE AND KOTOKO AIHARA LIVE IN THE SAME HOUSE! THEY'RE SO IN LOVE!** ".

A pounding headache formed right in the center of my forehead. I gritted my teeth as more people either looked at me and giggled or spread more news.

" _I'd have never guessed it_." I heard someone whisper.

" _Yeah, me either. Opposites attract, I guess_." Someone whispered back. I shot Aihara's friends a glare, but it only stopped them momentarily.

Seeing as how Aihara wasn't here and fretting over all of this, my guess was that she didn't know and I wanted answers.

I sped down the hall and upstairs to the doorway of Class F where I caught my breath.

" _Aihara_!" I shouted at her. She jumped, startled as I rushed toward her.

"What's wrong?" She said as I reached for her arm to drag her out with me.

"Just come with me." An eruption of "aww"s sprang forth behind us as I ran out the door, tugging Aihara along with me to meet the mess she'd created.

I pulled her down the hall and to the stairwell with me.

"I thought I wasn't supposed to talk to you at school." She said in confusion.

"I don't think it's going to matter too much anymore." On the first floor, I dragged her down the hall to where her friends had created the billboard.

Reaching it, I threw her in front of me. She gasped and gaped up at the billboard and the photocopied pictures. She then stared at her friends, seemingly betrayed or annoyed, or something of that sort.

Guiltily, she came back to me, "Um…" she said and smiled. No matter the situation or how mad I was, there she was, smiling. But that wasn't what I wanted to see.

"What's wrong with you? Could you not find it in you to keep this to yourself?" I retorted and the smile disappeared. I left her there in the hall to face her friends herself. If she felt bad, that was her own problem. She'd caused this by not being able to keep one simple secret. Then again, how much could I have been expecting from her? Class F had the reputation for having the biggest mouths in the school. I shouldn't have been as surprised as I was. I must've overestimated her.

I stomped up the stairs and to Class A where I sat fuming for hours while my classmates gave me funny looks. I would have been giving myself those looks, too. Since they were Class A, they'd probably already figured out that I'd helped Aihara get into the top 100 list, but couldn't piece together why.

As bad as today was going, at least I could say my other secret wasn't out of the bag. But, with Aihara being the way she naturally was, how long would that remain intact?

With class coming to a break, I stood to go to the bathroom downstairs. I passed the billboard on the way there and back, grounding my teeth together at the sight.

On the way back up to Class A, I ran into Aihara. As extremely mad with her as I was, I ignored her and walked right by like she didn't exist. But she stopped and gave me a sad look. Good… she was upset she'd let this slip, as she should have been.

"Irie-kun…" I continued forward, pretending to not hear her, "I'm sorry." She said. When I didn't stop, she chased after me.

"I'm really sorry!" I stopped, but I didn't face her.

"Since you're "in love" with me, perhaps you don't mind the rumor. Maybe you even enjoy it. But I really can't stand them," I said and started walking again, "Stop screwing up my life." I turned to stare her down dead. Her expression turned dull and her face dropped. I went back to class.

At the end of the day when I left Tonan for home, I didn't find Aihara anywhere. With that, I thought she might finally move on from this crush she had. Maybe my life would start going back to the way it was.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten**

Aihara didn't get home until after dark, my mother greeting her at the door.

"Kotoko," she said with worry lacing her tone, "It's so late. Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm okay," Aihara said, though she looked quite the opposite, "Sorry for making you worry. I completely forgot to call." She dragged her feet upstairs with a long face. My mother appeared to only be more concerned.

Aihara needed to stop this. All of this fuss over a stupid crush? It held no meaning, and now she was making my mother worry because of some supposed feelings that probably accumulated over a mere week before confessing to me. What was worse was that while she would get over it, she was causing so much trouble since she still wasn't.

From the living room, I heard her door click shut. She didn't reappear. To be this dejected, she was taking it too far.

I took a shower and dressed for bed. My mother ran Aihara up a bath.

"A bath will help her to feel better and clear her mind," she told me as I was on my way up, "Go let her know it's ready, okay?" I headed for her bedroom.

All beyond the door was silent. I knocked, "Hey, the bath is ready." No answer. I waited a moment.

"I'm coming in," I said and turned the knob, "My mother told me to tell you the bath is ready." My eyes landed on her, asleep at her desk. She was peaceful, but her face was blotchy and her eyes were puffy. The smallest traces of tears dampened her eyelashes. Laid out beside her was the envelope for the love letter I rejected.

I thought for moment, wondering what was going on inside her head and if this letter would explain anything to me about why she wouldn't let it go.

I reached for the envelope, my fingertips grazing the edges as I decided to read it. Holding it nimbly, I slid the letter from its encasement. It was small, only one page long. The handwriting was in perfect condition. I began to read it.

 _Dear Naoki Irie_ ,

it said.

 _My name is Kotoko Aihara, and I am from Class F._

 _You don't know me, but I know you._

I stopped for a second and examined the writing. I tried to find a single error. There wasn't one. She'd written it so perfectly, it must've taken her hours.

 _Since two years ago, when you made your speech at the_

 _entrance ceremony, I have been admiring your intelligence_

 _and how handsome you are. The first time I saw you, I_

 _felt like I was hit by a shooting star. I started falling for you._

 _I love you._

Finishing reading the letter and glancing over at her sleeping, swollen face, I felt a twinge of guilt. She'd been feeling this way for over two years at this point. I'd rejected a letter she'd worked hard to write. Maybe this wasn't such a simple crush after all.

And if it wasn't so simple, this torture would never end. She would continue to mess things up for me and make everything more difficult than it should be.

"Why me?" I said to her, though knowing she couldn't hear me. I slipped the letter back into the envelope and returned it to the desk.

I returned downstairs to tell my mother the drain the bath and went to bed.

When I woke the next morning, my mind was clear. I wasn't nearly as angry as yesterday. In fact, in the presence of the soothing, pale sunlight of morning, I was calm. I wasn't mad with her anymore. It would've done nothing anyway.

I was downstairs and at the table before anyone else. I read the newspaper until my family and Aihara's father congregated around the table for breakfast. My mother was as worried as she was yesterday. She glanced over at the stairs, her brows knitted together.

"Kotoko is late. I hope she's okay after yesterday." She said.

Aihara's father looked concerned, "What happened yesterday?"

"She came home hours late and didn't eat anything and I didn't hear anything from her for the rest of the night. She looked so depressed. Do you know what happened with her, Naoki?" I didn't look up from the paper.

"No idea." I went on to the sports section where I recognized an acquaintance of mine. Her name was Yuko Matsumoto. Once in a while, I would see her in the paper, either for some academic achievement or because she was such an exceptional tennis player. I knew her through the sport, but only vaguely. And this time she was in the paper for winning a tournament.

I skimmed through the article. It became quite late to the point that I would be leaving for school in a few minutes and Aihara still hadn't shown. She better not have been thinking about skipping school for being upset. She wasn't smart enough for that and I wasn't about to be having her beg or blackmail me into helping her complete her workload.

Right as I was finishing up the paper, Aihara skipped down the stairs in a hurry.

"Good morning!" She said, all bright-eyed. It was as though yesterday had never happened. Resilient, she was.

"Good morning, Kotoko." My mother said, seeming to relax since Aihara looked to be in a better state of mind.

"You sleep in too late," Her father said to her as she took a seat, "Why don't you wake up early for once and help Mrs. Irie with breakfast?"

"I'm sorry." Aihara said.

"Don't worry about it," Said my mother, "Naoki and Yuuki never help me either. Just hurry up and eat your breakfast. It's getting late."

Aihara grabbed a piece of toast, and as she did, she snuck a longful glance at me.

"Kotoko, do you think you can come home early today?" Her father said and interrupted the look she was giving me, thankfully.

"Sure I can. Why?"

"Iri-chan and his family are being so great to us. I want to make them dinner tonight to show them our gratitude. I want you to help me make it."

"Oh, please, Mr. Aihara, you don't need to do that." My mother said.

"It's the least we can do, and it's my pleasure." I couldn't say I would object to his cooking, considering that he owned a restaurant. But if Aihara was helping, the food (or at least portions of it) would be inedible.

"Ai-chan is the best cook. I'm sure it'll be a great meal. That's something to look forward to, isn't it, Naoki and Yuuki?" The only thing to look forward to was seeing Aihara buzzing around the kitchen and spilling things and generally messing up. The thought of it entertained me already.

"Right," I said, standing, "I'm going to get going now." Coming away from the table, I heard my mother whispering with Aihara.

Knowing she would be catching up no matter what I did, I slipped slowly into my shoes at the front door. Sure enough, in swooped Aihara and shoved her feet into her shoes.

Turning and seeing her, bread crumbs littered over her face, my mind conjured up something fun to do that would probably leave her frazzled the rest of the day. I peered at her for a second.

"What is it?" She asked, her eyes darting about.

I reached over and brushed the crumbs off her face, much to her surprise. She leaned away from me and stared at me in shock.

"There were bread crumbs." I left out the front door, laughing slightly to myself. She stayed put those two meters back on the way to school, silent as ever.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven**

Hints of smoke wafted from the kitchen and into the living room. I watched it inch across the ceiling in dread of the dinner that was to come.

"Kotoko!" I heard her father say, "I told you to watch the stove!"

"Sorry!"

A laugh escaped me. There was a clank in the next room.

"Ah!"

"Hurry, go get a towel."

Aihara busted through the sheen of smoke and ran at full speed to the hallway closet. I laughed harder.

Yuuki eyed her in disdain, "Stupid Kotoko. She's probably ruined the food." I composed myself. It was true, but for now I was enjoying myself in watching her fret about and trip over herself.

She dashed back to the kitchen with a towel at hand.

"Why don't you go to the living room and wait with Naoki and Yuuki? I'll finish up dinner." Her father said.

Aihara sighed, "Okay. Sorry I cause so many messes." She said and made her way to the couch, seating herself in dismay.

"Thank God," I said, "I was starting to think there would be no food left." She narrowed her eyes at me and sighed again.

A minute and she'd gone to her bedroom to wait for dinner to be done. Her father went about making the food and no more mistakes were made, at least not ones I could hear.

"Kotoko, come help me set the table." Her father called up the stairs after twenty minutes. She should've been able to do that simple task, assuming she wouldn't break anything or spill the food on the floor.

My family and I gathered around the table to see various dishes set out. Many of them appeared to be more than edible, the ones so obviously made by her father. But there were a select few that stood out in the fact that they looked awful. And I would not be trying those dishes no matter if my parents wanted me to or not.

"Wow, they look so _good_!" My mother said eagerly.

"You sure are a pro, Ai-chan." My father said. Yuuki pointed out a particular dish that I myself had been wondering about. It was so disgusting and messy, there was no way of telling what kind of food it was supposed to be.

"What is that?" He said and crinkled his nose.

"It's the fried tofu I made," Aihara smiled, her mood having improved, "It tastes better than it looks."

"I won't eat it." Yuuki said. Aihara's smile dropped into embarrassment.

"Me either." I said. The sludge on that plate wouldn't be coming within a foot of me.

"Naoki, Yuuki! Don't say things like that." My mother frowned at us.

"She's right. Let's just sit down and enjoy this great meal." My father slid into his seat, and I followed.

"I'll have some of the fried tofu." My father said and took the dish. He stabbed at and tried to pick up the tofu, but it was sloppy and hard to handle. Eventually, he was able to get some in between his chopsticks.

"If I eat this, so are you two. Got it?" He said and popped the piece of "tofu" into his mouth. When he didn't spit it back out immediately, Yuuki reached for some to try.

The pleasance on my father's face morphed into a mix of shock and disgust. His eyes watered and he near gagged before forcing himself to swallow.

Yuuki, on the other hand, spewed the tofu out into his napkin and wiped his mouth, "It's awful…" he said.

"As expected." I said as they struggled with the tofu.

"No, it's good. Really good." My father tried, but it wasn't very convincing. Aihara looked to the floor and bit her lip, cringing.

"You don't have to be nice. She's always been a terrible cook. I can hardly believe she's my daughter," Aihara's father said, "If it goes on like this, she won't be able to find a family to marry into."

"I'm sorry." Aihara said, sounding pained.

"You don't need to worry, Kotoko," My mother said and a look crossed her… one that said she had ideas. I'd never liked what that look resulted in in the past, "You can marry into our family."

I froze. Everyone stared at my mother, taken aback by this statement. When I looked to her, I glared. Aihara gaped.

"You should marry Naoki." My mother said. Aihara continued to gape, at a loss for words.

"Absolutely not," Yuuki intervened, "I object." Aihara returned from her wild imagination back to the dinner table.

"Right. Please don't decide these things without asking us first." She said.

"Stop playing with our lives." I said.

"Oh, really?" My mother pressed, "Because I think you and Kotoko would be great together. She's your type." A grin spread across Aihara's mouth, pleased with that idea, though it wasn't even close to the truth.

"Really? Is that so?" Excitement danced in her eyes.

"No, it's not so," I said, hoping to shut down these plans before they begin, "I'm not interested in you."

Aihara's expression hardened, "Well, I'm not interested in you, either." She attempted a glare, but she could never have pulled off any kind of menacing look. She was too soft for it to look legit.

And this was quite the interesting bit of information I was hearing, considering I'd found her last night with that love letter out on the desk. It would've been thrown out a while ago if she wasn't interested, or so she was trying to play.

"But didn't you write me a love letter? It was quite passionate." She dropped the act and her face drained. She stared at me in a panic.

" _Dear Naoki Irie,_ " I recited, recalling it from from my memory, " _My name is Kotoko Aihara and I am from Class F. You don't know me, but I know you._ " Aihara stood from her seat. I wasn't sure if she was going to storm the room or if she was just in complete shock since she hadn't known I'd read it.

" _Since two years ago, when you made your speech at the entrance ceremony, I have been admiring your intelligence and how handsome you are…_ "

Aihara slapped me. Not just a small slap either, but a hard one. It left a noticeable sting. I stood, outraged.

"What was that for?" I shouted at her.

"You're terrible! You read it?" She whined at me, hopelessly upset. She'd been outed at last.

"It was written to me." I said.

"You didn't need to memorize all the words!"

"I can't help it. If I read it once, I remember it!"

"You didn't have to recite it in front of everyone, though!"

My mother interrupted us, "Wait, hold on. Does this mean you liked him for a long time?" I realized then that this had been a bad mistake. What was intended to prove Aihara wrong had turned into bait my mother would take to make into this fantasy she'd conjured up. Bad move.

I reseated myself, "Tell them the truth." There was no way around it now. Aihara was silent. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, caught.

"I wrote a love letter." She said. She sat, refusing to make eye contact with anyone.

"So, my suggestion isn't so far off after all." My mother delighted. Her fantasies shot through the roof.

"I wrote it before we moved here. I don't like him anymore." Aihara said in desperation.

"Oh, don't say that. You should start liking him again," She turned to my father for approval, "Right, honey?"

My father scratched his head awkwardly, "Right, if that's what makes them happy."

The screeching of a baboon sounded at the patio door. Wait, no. It was only Kinnosuke and that gathering of idiots Aihara called friends. Just when I'd thought my night couldn't have taken a worse turn, that moron had to show up with his shouting and irritating voice.

" _Open the door!_ " He screeched.

"Who are those kids?"  
"Kin-chan?" Aihara said. Kinnosuke was going positively nuts on the other side of the door.

" _Kotoko, open the door!_ "

"They're my classmates." Aihara made for the door and slid it open. That bunch chattered and yelled to the point I wanted to leave my own home. No doubt I would since they now knew where I lived.

"What are you doing here?" Aihara said.

"I'm sorry, Kotoko," one of her friends said, "We just wanted to see where you lived." Kinnosuke flew past the door and strutted toward me.

"Irie may be a genius, but he's also a guy. He could turn into a wild animal at any time." Aihara rushed up to his side and flinched at his yelling, "See, I was right about coming here." He yelled back to the others, "I heard him saying those things to Kotoko." I ignored him as best as I could.

"Who are you?" Yuuki said.

"Oh," Kinnosuke said, turning nicely to my family, "Pleased to meet you, Irie's family. I'm Kinnosuke Ikezawa. Kotoko's classmate."

"Then that means you're also stupid." Yuuki said.

" _What did you say?_ " Kinnosuke bellowed.

"Stop that, Yuuki." My mother shushed.

Kinnosuke's demeanor changed again to easygoing, "Kotoko and I have a pretty hot relationship at school."

"Stop, Kin-chan, that's not true."

"Oh my, Kotoko is very popular, it seems." My mother said.

"Yes, she is." Kinnosuke said. He was leaving out the fact that she popular over mainly bad occurrences. Rejected love letter, collapsed house, and that she was living with me. There was only one single good thing that had spread about her, and that was the thing she'd blackmailed me into helping her achieve.

"Sorry about this." She said with a scowl. She grabbed Kinnosuke by the arm and tried to lead him to the door. He resisted.

"So, don't even try anything. Marriage? Forget it. It's not happening. Understand, Irie?" He said my name with such spitting malice that it made me come up with something I could say that would drive him nuts.

"I can't promise that."

"What are you talking about?" He stared down at me.

"People change their minds all the time. You hate someone one day, but like them the next." Aihara shone with the utterance of those words.

"You _do_ like Kotoko, don't you?" Kinnosuke said with such idiotic anger.

"I'm not sure," I said and stood to leave the room as I couldn't handle another second of Kinnosuke's presence, "But remember that she likes me more than she likes you." Kinnosuke's face distorted with loathing.

"I'm going upstairs now. Enjoy your stay."

I left them, wondering if I'd done any of the right things tonight or completely screwed myself over.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve**

Summer vacation came without another incidence from Aihara (other than the usual clumsiness, raucous, and mistakes). Since the end of the year exams and she'd asked me to help her study again, to which I declined, I'd been wondering if she passed her exams or if the house would be more peaceful this summer.

And on the morning of the first day of summer break, Aihara crept down the stairs, guilt written all over her face. Of course, as there always was, there was also a smile.

"Good morning." She said.

"Good morning, Kotoko," my mother said and eyed the school bag slung over Aihara's shoulder in confusion, "Doesn't summer vacation start today?" Aihara pressed her lips together and looked away from my mother.

"Yes… but not for me."

"Why?"

Clearly, my mother hadn't yet been acquainted with Aihara's scores. She may have passed the midterms with my help, but she would not have had it not been for that wretched picture. Little did my mother know, Aihara couldn't do anything right without a lot of help from others.

"Um… well, because…" Aihara hesitated and trailed off. She must've felt lucky when the doorbell rang.

"Yuuki, can you go get that?"

Yuuki slid from his chair and travelled to the main hallway. With the opening of the door came my agitation.

"Good morning!" Kinnosuke said with his voice echoing through the house and emphasis on 'good', but I couldn't see how it was as such now that he was here. Thankfully, I knew he wouldn't be staying since Aihara was leaving.

"I'm here to pick up Kotoko to attend extra classes together." He swept through the hallway to the dining area.

" _Extra classes_?" Her father said.

"But you were on the top 100 list for the midterms." My mother said, her jaw hanging.

"Right, but I didn't do so well on the finals." Aihara said stiffly.

I stifled a smile. 'Didn't do so well' was such an understatement.

"For you to have been on the list and still have to take extra classes, it must've been bad. You really are stupid." Yuuki said. This time, I couldn't hold it back. I didn't know why, but I found this so funny.

"Hey, _stop that_ , Yuuki." My mother said and Aihara forced a smile.

"Okay. Well, I'm just going to leave now." She backed up slowly toward Kinnosuke who took her by the arm and marched her out the front door with the grin of an idiot.

"This is actually good for you, you know," he said on the way out, "You can get away from that beast for a while."

I held back from chuckling. What Kinnosuke didn't know was that I could have gone to the school if I wanted to. I'd recently received the schedule for the tennis club, and they were having practice today. While I hadn't been interested in going, I wondered if it would be fun to see Aihara mess around with her idiots and if it would anger Kinnosuke.

I instead opted for what would be less of a hassle, and what I couldn't do much of when she was around. I read.

I melted into a comfortable chair and had my way with the novel I was currently reading. But there existed a problem. I bored of it rather quickly, and it was new for me to have been disinterested in reading as it was one of my favorite pastimes.

Maybe tennis practice wouldn't be so bad after all…

Shutting the book, I headed upstairs where I changed and slung the bag containing my tennis racket over my shoulder.

"I'm leaving." I said as I descended the stairs and made for the front door in the hopes that my mother wouldn't catch me on the way out.

She bumbled on into the entryway. I regretted that I hadn't left without telling her.

"Where are you going?" She said as she ran her gaze over my clothes and excitement seeped from her. And I knew exactly what she was thinking.

"Tennis practice."

"But you never go to tennis practice. Why are you going now?" Her eyes sparkled with hope.

"I just felt like it. Is there something wrong with that?" I reached for the door knob.

"Oh, _no_. Not at all. Have fun!" My mother said. She really was getting herself worked up over nothing. Aihara would be inside and I would be outside. It was likely we wouldn't even be seeing each other.

 _And thank everything for that_. I thought as I walked on toward Tonan.

As I came through the chainlink fence, a couple of people stared at me like they'd seen a ghost.

"Naoki Irie!" The club leader, Kudara said and made his way for me, "You're coming to practice today?"

"Obviously." I said. There would've been no other reason I was here.

"Oh, good," he said and fetched a racket quickly, "Partner with me. I could use the challenge." Kudara was by far the best player who was actually _in_ the club (as I only played in tournaments, I didn't consider myself part of the club), so a good practice session was not on the table a lot of the time.

"Sure." I stole one end of a court. He served the ball on over which I returned easily. His serves weren't the strongest, but they definitely weren't bad. It was part of the reason he'd placed third in last year's tournament instead of second or first.

For about twenty minutes more, Kudara struggled with returning balls. He'd broken out into a sweat while I was barely hot. This activity, too, was becoming boring. I remembered why I never came to practice. It wasn't enough of a challenge, henceforth it wasn't exciting _or_ practice for me.

At least until the school doors busted open and out came Aihara, led by her teacher. He brought her to the track and barked something at her. She responded with skittering away and beginning a run around the track. What was she _doing_?

In the second it took for me to notice her, I missed one of Kudara's hits. He smiled, pleased with himself. A smile also crept across my mouth, but for a different reason.

Not again did I allow myself to miss a ball from distractions, but I did watch as Aihara struggled to get done running a few laps. She stopped to breathe and her teacher got after her again. I laughed as she whined and took off again.

This was how it went for nine laps around the track until I found the perfect opportunity. As Kudara hit another one my way, she came around the curve closest to the court. I hit it at her, partially because this match was tedious enough to make me want to interact with her.

It hit her dead on the forehead. Perfect. Aihara stopped and held her forehead.

" _Ouch_!" She said.  
"Uh oh." Kudara said as I jogged over, thankful to take a minute-long break from the match.

"Sorry, I didn't do it on purpose," I said as I reached her and scooped the ball up off the ground, "Shouldn't the class be over by now?"

"Oh, shoosh. I just felt like going for a run." Aihara said and looked to the ground.

"Aihara! Cut the marital quarrel and get back to running! You still have one lap left!" Her teacher shouted at her, making her jump a little and scramble away, looking horrifyingly embarrassed. I shook my head at her and laughed for the hundredth time today.

I went back to the match and Aihara finished her tenth lap.

"Next time, you won't slack will you?" Her teacher said as they headed back inside.

...

"Here," My mother said as she handed Aihara a glass of tea later that night, "Did you have an extra class for gym?" She inspected the light bruise on Aihara's forehead. Aihara bit her lip.

"Um… well, no…" She said, a deer caught in a headlight.

"She was slacking in her extra classes, so her teacher had her run laps." I said, hardly containing my amusement. Aihara glared at me for a moment.

"Slacking in extra classes… you must only get dumber." Yuuki said.

"That's enough!" My mother said. Again, I laughed. She was becoming more and more entertaining as the days wore on. It wasn't actually so awful having her around anymore.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: The production of this fanfiction was a little fast at first, but now I'm slowing down. Official posting days are now Fridays and Sundays. Enjoy :D**

 **Chapter Thirteen**

I stayed inside as my father and Mr. Aihara loaded a bus on the last day of summer vacation. The two of them had been so excited to go to their junior high reunion that they may as well have burst into flames. And it was a good thing they'd finally left so they could be put out of their misery of waiting.

My mother, brother, and Aihara closed the door behind them as they reentered.

"They were acting like elementary students going on a field trip." My mother said on the way through the living room.

The phone rang from the kitchen and she ran for it.

"Irie residence," she said, "What? Oh no! I'm on my way." This tore me away from the book I was reading. My mother stood with a horrified look on her face as she hung up the phone.

"Oh goodness." She said.

"What happened?" I asked as I came to the kitchen.

"My mother's been hurt. It's not bad, but she has to stay overnight at the hospital," For just a millisecond, there was a lapse in her panic-stricken face and I bored into her, "I need to stay with her." She said, turning to Aihara.

"Do what you can to help." Aihara said with an approving smile. She must've had no idea what my mother was doing, that she was lying.

"Thank you, Kotoko. I will," My mother turned her attention back to me, "You two please take care of the house."

"Yes," Aihara nodded, and it dawned on her, "Wait… just _two_?" I rolled my eyes. I could see right through my mother's intentions.

"I'm bringing Yuuki with. You two have school tomorrow so it would be better if you didn't have to watch him."

I sighed. There would be no stopping her, so I said, "Alright."

My mother snatched Yuuki from his seat despite the protests he spewed and flew him out of the kitchen, "Now hurry, Yuuki! Go get ready." She took off after him.

A string of obscenities formed in my brain as Aihara gave me a day-dreamy look and smiled, overjoyed to be spending the night alone with me. I could only see problems arise right before me.

Because of this, I decided to retreat into my bedroom for the rest of the day and leave her to herself. She was going to cook up some ideas whether I was present or not, so I thought I may as well get some peace for the time being.

I finished my book and retrieved another from the shelf. Reading this one did not go over so smoothly, though. I began to hear Aihara clanking around in the kitchen, the sploosh of water, and the exclamations of "ow", "oops", and "oh no". It wasn't like I had bionic hearing either… she was just that noisy.

I became tired of trying to concentrate after a bit and snapped the book shut. Reaching for the doorknob to go see what she was doing, I picked up on her talking to herself and sniggered.

On the way downstairs, I noticed wafts of smoke weaving in and out of my face. And if it was this bad _outside_ the kitchen, I couldn't imagine what it would be like _in_ the kitchen.

I pushed the door open to be greeted with smoke blasting me in the face. I coughed and searched for Aihara through the haze, waving the stuff away from me.

"What is going _on_?" I said as I reached the stove and Aihara. Everything was a mess. Sauces were splattered on the counter. Carrot peelings laid around randomly. Every dirty dish was stacked up on each other in and around the sink. The idea of having her clean this horrified me.

My gaze finally settled on her. She was at the stove whipping up some watery… soup?

"Irie-kun..." she said as she turned to me guiltily with the pan of some unrecognizable type of food.

"What is that?" I said, as I couldn't even attempt to guess.

"Bifteck en bourgeoise… um…" She said. I'd have never guessed that in a million years.

She spilled some on the floor and giggled about it, looking up at me like she was in trouble. In a single moment, I had another one of those intrusive thoughts. It was so…

 _Cute_.

I batted away the thought. I sighed and said, "Throw that out." I got to work cleaning up the counters. If we were going to be eating tonight, it was going to have to be me cooking.

" _Okay_ …" Aihara said and threw the whole soup in the garbage. Not even the sense to pour the liquid down the drain… but I suppose I should've known to tell her since she really never seemed to know anything.

I piled the rest of the dirty dishes into the sink, "If I'm cooking, you can at least clean these." I said as I wiped the counter up, tossing carrot peelings into the garbage as I came across them.

"Right," She said and looked at me apologetically, "Sorry."

"Stop apologizing and just wash the dishes." She snapped to it. Naturally, I was quicker than her and finished first, so I went to help with the dishes.

We were done in no time flat.

"What was it you were trying to make?" I asked. Aihara fetched a cookbook.

"This." She said, a smile spread across her endlessly happy face. I took it from her and ran my eyes over the recipe. Having memorized it, I collected the ingredients quickly and laid them out before me in an orderly way on the counter. Aihara hung back and watched me in admiration. I started cutting the carrots.

"Don't you need to look at the recipe?" She said.

"I already did." Such a scatterbrain. She should've known by now that I only had to see things once to remember it.

Aihara took a seat and watched me over the counter as I cut the vegetables and prepared the meat.

"It smells so good. How did you get good at cooking?" She said, beaming at me. I'd forgotten she was there for a second, as she'd been melted away into the wonders of her mind.

"It's just a set of instructions. It can't be that hard to follow. And yet you still can't get it right." I said. Aihara bit her lip.

Once I was done, I served the food according to the picture in the book and set the plates on the table.

Aihara compared her plate and the picture and gaped, "Amazing! They look _exactly_ the same."

"Just eat." I said as I cut off the first bite of food. She set the book to the side and dug in.

Her eyes rolled back into her head, "It's delicious." Surprisingly, that was the only thing I heard from her the entire time we ate until near the end when she said, "I'm sorry I made you cook this."

I found the perfect opportunity, as this whole supper had been dull.

"Then I would like something sweet from you." I said. She raised her eyebrows at me. I leaned forward, playing at the idea that I would ever actually kiss her. And then I left, almost thrown into a fit of laughter.

I'd been in my bedroom for a few minutes when came a tap. Aihara opened my door and slid in.

"Are you doing your homework?" She said.

"Homework? I finished it on the first day of vacation." I said.

"The first day? You truly are amazing…"

"Don't tell me you haven't done it." In no way was I helping her this time. She'd gotten herself into this by waiting so long. She grinned, her cheeks going rosy.

"Nope." She said.

"Well, that was a bad choice. Because, for you, it would take a week. And that's excluding sleep." Her face drained instantly.

"Good luck." I said. She left and I dressed for bed.

…

A creak roused me. There was someone in my room. Aihara. I opened my eyes and let them adjust to the dark. Surely, there she was, sneaking on over to the desk. There was another creaky floorboard.

" _Shhh_ ," She said to herself. It was everything I had in me not to give it away that I was awake.

" _Notebook, notebook…_ " She whispered. I heard the shuffling of papers, then a footstep as she began back toward the door. The little sneak.

I shot up and grabbed her arm, pulling her onto the bed, "What are you doing here? Making noises in my room in the middle of the night." She looked positively terrified and embarrassed.

"Nothing!" She said, "Goodnight!" She tried to leave. I pulled her back.

"That's not going to happen."

"... _um_ …" She whined.

"I know," I said, "You came here to make love to me, didn't you?" Her mouth fell open as I pulled her down.

" _Huh_?!" Aihara said in a panic, "No, that's not the reason."

"There is no other reason to come to a guy's bedroom so late at night." This might've been going a little far. But that was what she got for waiting so long to do her homework, and then trying to copy off of me.

She stared at me. "Don't worry. I won't embarrass you."

"E-embarrass?" I nodded and leaned over her, "No, wait! I may like you, but I think we should be in a healthy relationship before…" It was the end of my composure and I cut her off with a laugh.

"'Healthy relationship'?" I let her go, "I see. So you do still like me."

Aihara scrambled up from the bed, "You… were you teasing me?"

"Don't worry. I have no intention of being in a relationship with you." She glared at me.

"I'm going to tell everyone you did this." She stood, fuming.

I crossed my arms, "Tell them. I'm sure there are worse rumors concerning us anyway." Aihara stomped to the door and I reached for the journals she dropped when I grabbed her.

"You forgot these." I waved them at her like bait. It clearly written all over her face that she wanted them, I climbed out of bed and headed toward her bedroom. She was stumped.

"Hurry up before I change my mind and go back to bed."

"Thank you, Irie-kun!" She shouted as she rushed after me.

"Not so loud. I just woke up."

"Oops," she giggled, "Sorry." I sat the two journals flat on her desk. Her worst subjects: math and English. This was going to be a long night.

"Which subject first?"

"Math." Aihara sat beside me and pulled out her own journal. For hours she'd been doing this homework and she'd written down zilch but one number on one of the problems.

I explained to her the formula for the equation. When that was too fast for her, I simply walked her through the entire problem. We didn't have time for this sort of thing. The same went for the rest of the page.

"We're using the same formula on this question." I said as I brought her to the next question. I was becoming so drowsy it was hard to stay awake. Aihara yawned.

"Can't I just copy it?" She said.

"Then there would be no point to doing homework." I said. Seeing they are contagious, I also found myself yawning. I yearned to go back to sleep.

We finished with math at around 3 am and started English, the lesser of the two evils. This one was easier to get through and we were finished before 6 am. The normal time we would wake up in the morning. Getting through the day sleepless would wreak havoc on me.

With all of that finally finished, we left her bedroom and met out in the kitchen. She plopped down into a chair.

"I can't believe we stayed up all night," she said, "As a token of my apology, I'd like to make breakfast for you."

"Please don't. I don't want to be sick on the first day back on top of being tired." I said. She was disappointed. Then I remembered about her coffee.

"Coffee. If you could make some coffee for me, that'll do." Not having the energy to smile as wide as she usually did, she settled for something a little more muted and small.

"Sure."

I waited as she brewed the coffee and an amazing smell wafted through the kitchen. What was it about the way she made it? Of all things to be good at… brewing coffee.

She brought me and herself a mug and sat with me at the table. The first sip of that sweet coffee brought back a few of my senses.

Aihara's mouth split into a tired smile, "Good morning." She said.

"We've been up all night. You don't have to say good morning." I said.

 _Only she would think to say 'good morning' after all that_. I thought.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen**

Over fall, into winter and the new year, nothing particularly noteworthy happened. Well, except for the fact that Aihara had managed to get accepted to Tonan University. She begged me to help her because her "future depended on it".

I helped her study. By this point, I was used to it and if I didn't help her, she would end up repeating the test over and over. So I figured I would get it over with because I would end up having to help her anyway. That was her only problem, but I had my own.

While it would've been easy (snap-of-a-finger easy) for me to get into Tonan University or an even higher scale university, that didn't mean I wanted to go. At college, there was nothing I couldn't learn alone. I didn't need the instruction of a teacher when I myself practically was one when it came to Aihara.

Not only was I unsure about college itself, but my entire future. I could see nothing, my entire future a bleak, white canvas of nothing. No problems I'd come across before now had been quite as troubling as this.

I'd look to Aihara who was so excited about it. A girl who struggled in almost everything excited for a larger and even more complicated workload. And for what? I wished I had that kind of zest for life, that inspiration.

It was a Saturday as my family and hers celebrated the acceptance. Aihara was the most elated I'd ever seen her.

"Congratulations on your college acceptance, Kotoko" was spelled out on the cake my mother made.

My mother lifted her glass, "Here's to Kotoko's college acceptance!" Everyone raised their glasses as well and clinked. All this over getting into a measly escalator system…

"Let's eat." My mother said as she cut into the cake.

"Thank you so much for this, Mrs. Irie." Aihara said with a great smile.

"It's my treat. I love making things like this." My mother said as she passed my father the first piece of cake to hand around.

"You were a little girl not too long ago," Her father said, "But you'll be in college this spring. I'm sure your mother is so proud of you." He became sullen quickly.

"Dad…" She said and rubbed his shoulder.

"I'm okay, I'm okay." He said and took a deep breath.

"It's Naoki's turn next to get accepted into a college." My mother said and passed around a couple more pieces to Aihara and her father.

"He's not stupid like her. He can get into Tokyo University without any effort."

" _Yuuki_!" My father snapped at him.

"Oh, right," Aihara said and reached down, bringing a wrapped gift up with her. She handed it to me, "This is for you. It's a thank you gift for helping me pass the exam."

"That's so sweet," My mother interjected, "Hurry up and open it." I tore off the tissue paper to reveal one of the strangest devices I'd ever seen. It was a "head massager". In other words, a bundle of wires with balls at the ends which I was supposed to run over my head. I eyed it in amusement. It was so like her to do these silly things.

 _Well, you_ do _tend to give me some headaches_. I thought.

Yuuki took it from me, " _Head massager_?" He said, reading it from the box.

"Well, Irie-kun will be taking the Tokyo University exam soon, won't he? He still needs to study, so…" I tensed again at the mention. Everyone expected so much of me. But what if that wasn't what I wanted?

"These are for old men." He handed it back to me. I placed it back in the box.

"Hey, cut that out, Yuuki," My mother said, "Never mind that. Why don't you use it, Naoki?"

"Not right now," I was handed a piece of cake, although I left it on the table, never having been one to enjoy such sweets, "Besides, I haven't even decided if I want to go to college." My father froze as if I'd struck him in the face. My mother simply stared at me, and Aihara's eyes ran all over me, like she was contemplating me.

I wanted to leave the room from it. I hadn't said I'd murdered someone, just that I may not want to go to college. What was so wrong with that?

But with the high standards my parents had set for me and with my father wanting me to take over his company one day, college would've done me no good. If taking over a company was all I was going to do, then I wouldn't have to get into anything else or go to college. However, with my parents' thought system, I thought I might end up going to college whether I wanted to or not. My life was hardly mine, anyway.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen**

I shoved Tokyo University's brochure to the other side of the desk, so sick of having it in my face. My father was not subtle at all in that this was the college he wanted me to attend. His forcefulness made me even less willing. With the pre-test being tomorrow, the weight of it in my mind was heavy.

To clear my head, I picked up a book. Reading was the only non-stressful task I could complete in recent days. But the thoughts slowly trickled back into my mind. What was so wrong with that if I didn't want to go to college?

There was a knock at my door. Hopefully it wasn't my father or mother.

"Yes?" I said. Thankfully, it was Aihara who answered back (and I never thought I'd be _thankful_ to hear her answer back over anyone else, but I was).

"Can I bother you for a minute?" She asked as she snuck through the door and closed it. Wanting to think of anything other than college, I nodded and put down my book.

Aihara placed a cloth charm on the desk in front of me.

"I made this for you."

 _Good luck on the exams!_ The charm said. Of course. I would have rathered that she came to me with homework difficulties than anything about college right now.

"The pre-test is tomorrow, so I thought you could use some good luck. You are taking it, aren't you?" Her lips turned upward in a bright smile. She didn't expect any of this from me. Matter of fact, I was sure she would've preferred that we went to the same college, but she was genuinely excited for me. If only I was as excited for me as she was, maybe I would actually have the drive to go to college.

"I submitted the application." I said.

"Good. I think that would make your parents very happy, unless you had a different school in mind. It gives my father a hard time that I can't go to a big college. You're lucky."

 _Lucky_. I thought. Maybe I was lucky, maybe taking it for granted. And then there were people like her who didn't have a choice. To skip the exam or not go to college would be like a slap in the face to her, who could only choose one college.

"Well, that's it. See you later." She said as she went to leave.

"What are you planning to do in college?" I asked. She faced me and confusion settled over her.

"Study. And meet people and experience new things." She said.

"So, you're going to go there to study, which you don't enjoy doing in the first place," She stared at me with a blank expression, "I don't understand why everyone is so desperate to go to college."

"It's for smart people, like you, to learn more and get better at things." Aihara returned to my side at the desk.

"I don't want to go to college. I can learn by myself what is taught there with no problem." I said.

"But if there's something you want to do in the future… a career or job… you need qualifications for it." Careers, jobs… there they were, being brought up again. It wasn't as though I had a choice when it came to that since my father was practically forcing his company on me. Yet another reason I didn't need to go to college.

"What do you want to do?" I asked Aihara, curious.

"I don't know…" she said, as I'd expected, "but… oh, I know! You figure it out when you're in college." Her face brightened when she figured out the answer to the question, radiating happiness and warmth.

"Irie-kun, you shouldn't use your smart brain just for yourself. You should utilize it for the better of Japan." Her great smile did something different for me than before. It calmed me. Not even just a little. It calmed me a lot.

"You're amazing," I said and the words seemed to shock her, "I've always wondered 'why is it that she puts her whole self into everything she does… yet still she can't do it?'. I was impressed." The way she was was admirable, a place where everyone should strive to be. To try your best at everything you could possibly do and be happy about doing it.

"Are you being sarcastic?" Aihara asked.

"I wish I could be more like that." Before now, before I knew her, there had never been anything I wanted to be because I already had everything. I'd never had any goals, but this was something I wasn't. Her positivity was something I didn't possess, but something I wanted to have.

I realized then that I might've said too much, "I have to get up early tomorrow so I better get to sleep now."

"Right. Goodnight," Aihara said, beaming at me. She picked the charm up from the desk and brought it over to my school bag, "I'll just tie this on real quick." In a split second, the charm was tied onto my bag and she left for the night.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen**

The next morning, I woke groggily. Chills raked at me. I squeezed my eyes shut against the morning light as it killed my head.

"Great." I said as I shoved the blankets off. On any day to get sick, this just had to be the one. My head spun as soon as I stood. One look at the clock told me I was late. By this time in the morning, even Aihara would have been awake.

As quickly as my aching body could allow me, I dressed and grabbed my bag. Downstairs, I meandered into the dining room to find that, indeed, everyone was already present.

When my mother spotted me, her worry faded into relief, "Good morning!" She said and hurried a lunch box over to me, "Here's your lunch." It was all so fast, it made me think she was trying to not give me a chance to speak, to say that I wasn't taking the test, or to voice my opinion on the matter. But I wasn't interested in a struggle with my father today.

I took it from her with a nod. My scratchy throat begged me to cough, but to do that would mean the overreaction of Aihara and my parents. I held it in until I couldn't any longer, letting out a God-awful cough.

My mother stared at me, briefly paralyzed, "Are you feeling okay?" She asked me. I blinked a dizzy spell away.

"I think I've got a cold." I said.

"On this important of a day? This won't do! I'm going to go get some egg sake." My mother shot from her place.

"No-" I tried.

"Leeks work better for a sore throat." Aihara's father said. Aihara also left the table in a hurry. All this fuss over a simple cold. It wasn't worth it.

"Forget it," I called at them, "I'm leaving now." Patience wore on me.

"But if you're sick, you need to at least eat breakfast." My father said. Maybe that was true, but if I didn't get going now, I might've decided to not go at all.

"I don't have an appetite."

Aihara scampered back into the room with a pill bottle at hand, "This stuff works great. You should take some." She said, worry sewn into her brow. If only to make everyone calm down, I opened the bottle and dry-swallowed a pill.

"Good." She said. Something dawned on me. If I hadn't been sick, I'd have thought of it beforehand, but…

"Does this medicine make you drowsy?" I turned the bottle around to read, but Aihara snatched it from me in fear.

"Oh no," She said, " _Do not drive after taking this medication_." I closed my eyes and sighed heavily. When I opened them, my mother was panic-struck. Aihara's mouth hung agape and she looked as guilty as she was.

"Well, you can't go like this! You have to throw it up-" My mother said.

"No, that's enough. I'm leaving." I pushed past her and made for the door. Even when sick, anything was better than her doting. And now with Aihara to double it up. I would take a pass.

The cold air did nothing for my chills, though it did keep me awake on the walk to the train station. I was not very pleased to say that I did doze off for a mere second while clinging to a pole on the train. I was lucky to have caught myself before dropping out entirely. The whole trip was a daze and I gradually became drowsier.

I signed in at the college gates and showed my identification. At the doors, I was directed to a classroom number.

On the way, Watanabe found me, "Good morning." He said.

"Good morning." I was a little slow to say.

"You okay? You seem a little off." He said.

"Just tired." I said. Watanabe's eyes drifted on over to the charm I'd forgotten was strung onto my bag.

"Is that handmade?" He said, "Kotoko Aihara, right?" I paused.

"It doesn't matter. I'll probably just throw it away." With the way I said it, I sounded callous even to myself.

"I'd feel sorry for her if you do. She _did_ take the time to make it, and she's kind of my type."

 _His type?_ I thought. My shoulders tensed as we came to an elevator. Watanabe and I piled into it along with five others.

At the first stop, one person got off. At the next, two went. Watanabe and I went to climb off at the last stop. I picked my bag up from the elevator floor and was yanked back as I tried to leave. I pulled at it again and no luck. I looked for the source to find that the charm was stuck in the doors. They tried to close on me.

"What's wrong, Irie?" Watanabe said.

"The charm is stuck in the door."

 _She's given me a cursed charm_ , I thought.

"Just rip it off."

"It won't…"

The damn thing was so thoroughly jammed, there was no hope for me to remove it or make it to the test on time without some divine intervention. With my head throbbing, I punched the emergency call button in the elevator.

"You just go to the test. I don't think this will move." I said to Watanabe.

"But what about you?"

"I'll work this out as soon as I can."

"Good luck." Watanabe said and left me to tug and apologize to people wanting to take this elevator.

A repair man turned up after a few minutes with a tool bucket.

"What's the problem here?" He said, "Oh, I see." He dug out a pry bar and wedged it into the little crease where the charm was stuck. He tugged.

"Little bugger really is stuck. This could take a few minutes." He said.

For a solid ten minutes, he tried prying the doors open, digging the charm out, and pulling. It was a miracle when it did come free and I was running late.

"Here." The man said and handed me my bag at last, the charm still fully attached.

"Thank you." I said, taking off for the test site. Running despite my total lack of energy, I reached back and attempted to untie the charm, but not even the knot would come undone. This thing really was a curse.

I met up with Watanabe on a staircase leading to the classroom, "Hey." I said, gasping to catch my breath.

"That took a really long time," He said, "Well, let's hurry." Exerting even more inexistent energy, we rushed up the stairway.

"So, what happened to the charm?" He said and spotted it, "Oh. Maybe it's bringing you bad luck."

"I tried to take it off, but it wouldn't budge." I said. This time when I went to have a go at it, the charm fell right off. I bent to pick it up as I came around the corner of the stairway.

I was sent sailing down the stairs as a student rushed down the flight. I landed smack on my back at the bottom of the stairs, hitting my leg on a rail.

"Irie!" Watanabe said. He came down to help and others charged the scene.

"Call the infirmary." Someone said. My sight blurred.

"What a fearsome charm…" Watanabe said, and it was the last thing I heard as I passed out.

…

I woke in the infirmary with my ankle wrapped and my cheek throbbing. Immediately, I searched for a clock. The test had started twenty minutes ago. I hurried to sit up, my back aching with discomfort.

A nurse came to my aid, "Slow down, okay." She said.

"I have to leave and get to the test." I said and carefully slid my legs over the side of the bed.

"I know, but don't go so fast. You've sprained your ankle." She handed me a pair of crutches and helped me to stand.

"Good luck on your test." She said. I limped on down to the classroom on mostly one leg. Once there Watanabe spotted me and mouthed "good luck" at me as I made for the professor overseeing the test.

"Sorry I'm late. I was in the infirmary." I said. He nodded.

"Yes, I know. Your friend informed me," He handed me the pages-long test, "You may take your seat. You have thirty minutes to complete what you can."

"Thanks."

I carefully weaved through the desks to come to the one in front of Watanabe. I sat and propped my crutches up on the wall, and then dug through my bag for my pencil case. And that was when I found that all of my pencils were broken. After all of that struggle just to get here, too.

Watanabe had me covered, luckily, and loaned me a pencil.

The next thirty minutes was pure hell. Several times, I almost drifted off into sleep. The questions began to blur together after a while and I ended up guessing at a number of them. That Aihara… her luck was an ill omen to me.

The test finally finished and I rubbed my temples. I'd finished all of the questions, but I couldn't even begin to guess how I might've done. It was scary.

I reached over for my lunch, that maybe food might give me energy.

"I feel bad for asking," Watanabe said, "But how do you think you did?"

"I don't know. I guessed most of them."

"Well, you probably did fine, since it's you we're talking about."

What I unwrapped in the lunch box was the last thing I would've wanted to see. It was decorated rice balls with the word " _Pass!_ " written on each. Aihara had made it. I closed the lunch, not willing to try my luck with it since I was already sick.

" _Aihara_ …" I said.

"What? Did she also make the lunch?" Watanabe asked. He reached over and handed me a ball of onigiri, "Here. Eat this."

"Thanks. I appreciate it." I said as I took it from him.

"I know it's none of my business, but you should probably throw that charm out." He said.

"It's not on my bag anymore. I don't know what happened to it, but I don't have it." I said. The thing must've been picked up by someone else or forgotten on the stairway.

"Good. Now you won't have anymore bad luck." Watanabe said.

I thought about the charm. Aihara would probably notice later that I didn't have it. I wondered if she would be upset. But it was great to have it gone. No more worries.

As everyone readied to leave and I went to put on my coat, something fell out of my pocket. Watanabe gasped.

"There's really no escaping it, is there?" He said. I picked up the charm from the classroom floor. As dirty, torn, and beaten up as it was, it had survived everything and found it's way back to me. I clutched it in my hand in agitation and threw it into my bag.

"You're not going to throw it out?"

"No point. It'll just find a way back anyway."

"I have a feeling you and that girl will be together for a really long time." He said as he eyed the charm. I gritted my teeth.

"Don't say that." I said.

We left the college grounds.

…

"What happened?!" My mother said the second I was through the front door. Aihara's eyes went as huge as saucers.

"I fell." I said.

"The charm didn't work…?" Aihara said. The mention of that curse irritated me.

"Oh, it really worked well." I said, as this was what she wanted… for me and her to go to the same university.

"What do you mean?" She said. I simmered down.

"Never mind. I'm going to bed." I limped up the stairs without the crutches, not caring for the hassle of it.

I was out like a light as soon as my head met the pillow.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen**

Over the next two weeks as I waited for the results for the pre-test to come out, I was legitimately terrified. This was the first time my test results were unknown to me. I wasn't confident in the work. Then again, maybe it would've been best if I didn't pass the test because then I wouldn't be able to take the Tokyo University exam and hence not go to school there. My problems would be solved. Maybe the charm had actually done good on me.

The funny thing about that charm, also, was that I'd felt compelled to not throw it away. While it was broken, I just felt as though I should keep it. It was tucked away into the desk drawer. And for what reason? Maybe I thought by keeping it, I would fail the exam. I would be able to choose what I wanted to do.

But when the results came in the mail, I had passed and with flying colors. Not even the cursed charm had found a way to fail me.

When the day came for the actual test to be taken, everyone was happy about it except for me. And again, it was as though my mother rushed me out the door so I wouldn't have the chance to go against my parents.

On the way out albeit my lingering defiant thoughts, my parents and Aihara followed me to the door.

"You don't have to make sure, you know. I'm going," I said, "Bye."

"But we're worried." My mother said.

"Are you sure you don't want me to drive you?" My father offered for the umpteenth time.

"I'm sure." I slipped through the door before they could continue.

"Be safe." Aihara said.

 _Surely_ , I thought, _since that thing isn't tied to my bag_.

I didn't get a block into the walk before I noticed a very conspicuous figure creeping up behind me, though trying not to be seen. I let it go on for a bit as it was fun to see her dashing around to not be seen by me. She was so obvious, I wondered how she thought she wouldn't go noticed.

"Why are you following me?" I asked. Aihara stopped creeping and bounded right up to my side.

"I want to see you enter Tokyo University, and go past the gates safely." She said with an innocent half-smile. What I liked about that answer was that she wasn't following to make sure I didn't skip out on it. She was following to make sure I didn't sprain my ankle again.

She peppily walked at my side for a few silent minutes until a sound escaped her. It was sort of like a muffled whimper. I peered over at her to find that she was clutching her stomach. Unconcerned about it, I continued. Aihara slowed until she was walking a meter behind me, holding her stomach and walking with a gait. Her face was pale. If she was sick, she should've been at home, but she was too stubborn to know her limits and too dim to listen to any senses she had. And what was more, I didn't want to be taking the responsibility for leaving her to get home alone if she was ill.

I stopped abruptly and turned to her, "You don't look too well."

"I'm okay." She lied through a strained voice.

"If you don't feel good, you need to go back. Don't worry about me, worry about yourself."

"No. I want to see you through the gates and then I'll go."

"If you insist." I continued the trip nonetheless, Koto… Aihara lingering back and holding her stomach. She really didn't look well, but if there was one thing I'd learned about her, it was that she never gave up. If she wanted to see me through those gates, she would be. She wasn't going to go home just because I told her to.

I slowed some for her to catch up as we arrived at the gates of Tokyo University. Again, I looked over to her. A rare frown was set on her mouth and, still, she clutched her stomach. It was off… wrong. I began to wonder if it would be okay to leave her alone and go to this exam.

"Are you really okay?" I said. The ghost of a smile made her look only slightly more like herself.

"Of course," she said faintly, "Good luck on your exam." She waved me away. I hesitated before going in.

Not twenty feet inside the gates, I heard a gasp behind me.

"Oh no. Miss, are you alright? What happened?" I whipped my head around there she laid, curled into a ball on the ground. My eyes widened and I shot for the sidewalk beyond the gates.

A few people had gathered around Aihara.

"Excuse me." I said as I shoved past them and gathered Kotoko into my arms.

"Where is the closest hospital?" A woman pointed down the street toward a tall white building.

"Right there."

"Thank you." I said and took off carrying her. She was completely out of it. There was something so wrong with this. Adrenaline pumped through me and panic urged me toward the hospital. Thankfully, it wasn't far off.

I busted through the hospital doors and was swamped by nurses asking me what had happened.

"She was having stomach pain and then she passed out." I explained. They brought in a stretcher and rolled her away. I was brought to the front desk.

"Now, can you tell me who she is?" The nurse asked.

"Kotoko Aihara. Do you have a phone I could use? I need to call her father." She slid a phone on over to me.

"Go right ahead. We'll need a family member if she needs a procedure."

"Thanks."

I dialled her father's number. He answered on the first ring.  
"Hello?"

"Mr. Aihara, it's Naoki. Kotoko is in the hospital. She passed out from stomach pain at the university."

"I'll be right there! What hospital is it?" In the background I heard my mother gasp.

" _What happened?!_ "

" _Kotoko passed out from stomach pain_."

" _Oh, dear. Honey! Get ready, we're going to the hospital! Kotoko is sick._ "

"It's Tomone Hospital." I said once I was sure he could hear me.

"We will be right down." He said in a rush. I hung up the phone and gave it back to the nurse.

For the next half an hour as I waited for them to arrive, I was shaken to say the least. I hoped she would be okay… Kotoko. There was something different about referring to her as her first name.

A nurse approached me as I waited for the news.

"Her appendix has ruptured, but we can't perform a surgery until we get consent from a family member. Do you know when someone will be arriving?" My stomach sunk.

"They should be here very soon." I said and urged them to hurry.

A few minutes later, they bumbled through the door and Aihara's father came right to me, "Thank you so much for taking care of her. I hope it hasn't been too much trouble." He said. A nurse grabbed him and he took it from there.

"Naoki!" My mother said when she spotted me, "You better go to the exam or you'll be late. We're here now, so everything should be fine."

 _Oh_ , I remembered, _right_.

Truthfully, the exam hadn't even crossed my mind.

"Of course." I said, almost mechanically. It was such a routine to listen to my parents. I left the hospital, making for the university but my feet dragged. I came to a complete stop halfway there. I wondered what I was doing.

When I spotted a small cafe, I realized what I was about to do. I didn't want to take this exam. Maybe I'd been thinking about college since that chat I'd had with Aihara, that I might actually want to go. But not to this one. I couldn't quite place it, but it felt wrong.

I took to the cafe. It was warm inside and smelled like coffee, something I was in need of since I'd rushed out the door this morning. I seated myself at a corner booth where a waitress brought a menu. I only took a second to choose what I wanted,

"One cup of coffee and an omelet." I told her.

She was back in a moment with a warm cup. Taking the first sip, it was bitter, nothing at all like the way Aihara made it. But it would do the job.

As I sat waiting for my omelet and thinking about what I'd just done, I pondered my next step. I was so confused about college. I knew what I wanted to do but I didn't. It was like there was a big flashing, neon sign right in front of my face but it's directions were written in a language I didn't understand.

I drank my sour coffee, running my mind over everything, weighing my options. At the moment, Tonon University didn't sound too bad. It may have only been an escalator, and I may have been the only Class A thinking about going there, but I liked the idea of it. Plus, I wouldn't have to take any exams to get in as I was the highest ranked student in Tonan High.

Yeah… that was what I wanted. To go to Tonan University. Even with that figured out, though, I felt I was missing something. I was missing the reason I wanted to go there instead of an elite university. I could have gotten in anywhere I wanted and I chose the easiest possible place in the world.

Maybe it was because I didn't need to have the satisfaction of going to an elite school, because I was fully able to learn on my own.

My thoughts deepened. I was pulled from them when my omelet was delivered to the table. I ate it rather quickly, paid, and left for the hospital.

Not wanting to face my parents just yet, I sat in the waiting area and read a book I had packed in my bag for occasions such as these. It took an hour for me to be ready to face them and tell them about my decision. For all I was concerned about their reactions, they better not have been picky because they were lucky I'd even decided I wanted to go to college. I saddled up and went to the front desk.

"Can you tell me where Kotoko Aihara's room is?" I said, assuming the surgery to be done since it had been two hours.

"One moment," She said and typed something up on the computer, "That would be room 114. It's on the second floor."

"Thanks." I said. On the way there, I prepared for my parents' disappointment and their disapproval of my choice.

At the door, I heard the voices of my mother and father, and then of Aihara. Good. She was okay.

The moment I walked in and saw her, I noticed a visible change. The color had returned to her cheeks. While she still looked tired, woozy, and sort of out of it, she looked better.

"How did everything go?"

I don't think I'd ever seen my father's head snap around so quickly.

"Naoki… aren't you supposed to be in the exam?" Shock settled over him, since I hadn't listened and taken the exam like they wanted.

"I was hungry, so I got food instead." I circled around her bed and perched myself on the window sill.

"But what about Tokyo University?!" My mother shrieked.

"I'm not taking the exam." I said. My mother nearly passed out.

" _Oh no_ …" Kotoko looked at me like she might've been sick all over again. But this wasn't her fault. In fact, I was quite glad she'd decided to come along and give me the excuse to get out of the exam. That's not to say I was happy her appendix ruptured. I was just happy this was over with.

My parents pulled me out into the hall.

" _Naoki_ ," My mother said, "What were you thinking?"

"I'm not interested in going to Tokyo University."

"Where are you going to go, then? And don't even give me that 'I don't want to go to college' line." My father's face was red, boiling.

"Tonan." I said. Hearing it come out of my mouth was strange.

"The escalator? Why there? You could go anywhere you want." He said.

"It's close to home, I guess. And I don't have to take an exam to get in." My parents were flabbergasted. I left them in the hall that way to return to the hospital room where I again perched myself on the window sill.

Aihara looked as guilty as ever. I'd have told her it wasn't her fault if there hadn't been others there, but it wasn't worth it.

"Everything went well, right?" I said.

"Very. She can check out tomorrow." Her father said.

"Good."


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter Eighteen**

I couldn't sleep. There was still something bugging me about going to Tonan University. I wanted to go there _exactly_. Nowhere else had come close to crossing my mind. I couldn't figure it out.

It was so late out, but I dressed and grabbed my coat to leave the house. Maybe the cool air would help me to clear my mind, and a walk help me to sleep. Making sure I had a few dollars in my pocket, I crept downstairs and out the front door.

Cold air ripped through the trees and bit my ears. By the looks of it, it would be snowing sometime soon. But I would take my time with this walk. I didn't want to be in the house right now even if it was going to snow.

I took off for the sidewalk and began walking into town to buy a can of coffee. Even though I'd escaped the confines of the house, I'd had yet to escape my bewilderment and wandering thoughts.

Tonan… why there? There were many small colleges around here, so why that specific one? For the last two days since Kotoko came home from the hospital, it was all I thought about. It was an itch I couldn't scratch, a memory I couldn't jog.

And I hated it with every fibre of my being.

Not knowing was something that never happened to me. I always knew… equations, birthdays, names, faces, languages, and so many more things…

I wreaked havoc in my brain searching for an answer, coming up as short as I had when I left the house.

 _No_ , I said to myself, _no more thinking about it_.

Coming to a little gas station, I had luck momentarily shaking the thought away. A bell rung as I stepped through the door and I sucked in warmth, already preparing myself for when I would have to go back out.

I selected my can of decaf coffee from the vending machine and made my way for the door. With the heat from the can of coffee to warm my hands, outside wasn't so bad. A couple of snowflakes fell.

Heading for home, I was slow. I didn't want to go back yet, but there was nowhere else I could go. Half of the trip went and I'd had yet to open the can of coffee. The warmth was good enough this way.

I'd almost begun thinking again when I saw someone up ahead of me, and then I recognized who it was just from the way they walked.

 _Kotoko_. _What's she doing out here?_

A suitcase trailed behind her. I pieced together what she was doing and it was stupid. Such awful decision-making but it was so her. I should've expected as much.

"It's cold." She mumbled to herself.

"Then do you want to hold a can of coffee?" She spun around, startled. I held the can, my only source of warmth, out for her to take. She cuddled into it.

"Thanks… what are you doing out?" She said.

"I couldn't sleep, so I'm taking a walk," I said, "You're running away, right?"

She bit her lip, "Don't try to stop me. I don't want to cause you any more trouble."

"I'm not stopping you." She looked hurt.

"Then goodbye." Kotoko said and started to walk off with my coffee.

"Is it because I didn't take that exam?" I said and she stopped.

"I bring you bad luck. I heard from Watanabe from Class A about what happened during the pre-test." She faced me with an apologetic frown. But the only person that should've been sorry was Watanabe for telling her that, and now she was running away because of it. I'd kept it to myself for this specific reason.

"You might be right. You cause all of this trouble, but it was kind of fun," She ogled at me, "I've never been so nervous. It was an incredible experience."

"But what about the Tokyo University exam?"

"That wasn't your fault. I would have had plenty of time to make it there after the hospital."

"Then why?"

I knew then. It hit me so hard it was as if a baseball bat had struck me across the back of the head. A weight lifted off of my shoulders. It was because of her that I wanted to go to Tonan.

"I didn't want to go to Tokyo University in the first place. You said that you go to college for new experiences, and it's been fun getting nervous and excited around you. Tonan just feels like the place to be, and there's nothing specific I want to do at a big college."

Her frown turned upside down, "So… you chose the same college because of me?" Just her saying it, even though I essentially already had, irritated me.

 _So what_?

"No, that's not what I meant," I reclaimed my coffee, "If you're going to leave, then just go. Good Luck."

"Wait! Could I stay at your house for a little longer? I promise I won't cause any more trouble!" Kotoko said hopefully.

"As if you wouldn't cause any trouble. Be realistic."

She grinned, sucking up, "Then I promise to bring you an exciting life."

"Wow," I said, "It wasn't hard to change your mind." I continued home. Snow kicked in full gear. Good thing I wasn't far from home.

Kotoko skipped up to me, "It's Valentine's Day today." She said.

"What, do you have chocolate to give me?" It wouldn't have surprised me. I wouldn't have been able to eat it either, if she'd made it. And even if it was bought, I didn't have the taste for sweets.

"Sorry, no," she said, "Were you expecting one?"

"Not really." I said. She was such a liar. There was no way she hadn't made something. That was her thing.

At home, Kotoko banged on up the stairs with her suitcase. I shedded my coat and migrated to the kitchen. I would have to see it to believe it.

Sure enough, upon opening the refrigerator door, there sat a small pink box with a bow on it. That would be it.

"So, there is one."

I opened the box onto a homemade chocolate heart with the words " _congratulations on passing the Tokyo University exam!_ " written across it. Simply for the sake of it, I took a bite. The chocolate was clumpy and hard. The taste was strange and sort of sour.

" _Awful_." I said, choking down the bite.

After choking it down, I set the chocolate back in the box and admired it. She must've worked hard on this inedible piece of candy. There truly was no one more hard-working than her… not even myself.

I packaged the chocolate back up and brought it upstairs with me where I stored it next to the charm she'd made.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen**

"Almost everyone here is going to a different university." Watanabe said. All morning, he had to have been tiptoeing around the subject of college since, because I'd decided to use the escalator system, there were rumors it was because of Aihara. These rumors were becoming so tiresome. Did everyone in this school really have so little to do?

"It'll be sad to say goodbye," He said and then took a tentative peek at me, "Sometimes it doesn't matter if you go to a big college or not, though."

"Right." I said.

"Is it true what I've been hearing, then?"

I took a moment of silence before confirming the rumors, "Yes. I am going to be going to Tonan University."

"Because of Kotoko Aihara, right?" He asked. I didn't know how to respond. It was true that she was a part of it, but that wasn't anyone else's business.

"No."

"Are you sure about staying here? A person like you is designed for an elite school."

"If I change my mind, I will take the University of Tokyo exam next year."

"Got it," Watanabe said, "It _would_ be that simple for you."

 _Not if Kotoko makes me another charm_. I thought.

"You got into your first choice of college, didn't you? Waseda University. Congratulations." I said. Watanabe looked so proud of himself.

"Thank you."

The bell rang for the next class. Watanabe continued our conversation on the way there.

"Hey… if you didn't choose Tonan because of that girl, then why did you choose it?" This was a question with no good answers.

"I'm not sure. I just felt like I should go here." He gave me a funny look, but he never would have understood my reasoning.

"Good luck, anyway."

"Thanks." We took to the stairs.

"I've been meaning to ask you something. What did you end up doing with that charm she made you?" Was it possible for him to ask anything that didn't have to do with Kotoko, or that I could answer easily?

"I threw it out." I lied.

"Good thing. I was thinking that maybe the charm had hypnotized you to go to the same school as Aihara. That thing is powerful after all." Watanabe said.

The statement made me think. Maybe it had. But without it, I would've been going to a college I didn't want to go to. Perhaps the charm wasn't so unlucky.

We passed a window at the landing. Glancing out it, I caught a glimpse of Kotoko and Kinnosuke. I looked back out and watched the two of them walk to their next class. His arm snuck its way around her shoulders and tugged her closer, an idiot grin crossing him.

I clenched my teeth together and tension raked up my back. The sight of it irritated me. I couldn't stand it.

"Oh look," Watanabe said, "She's with that guy again… what's his name?" He thought, "Ikezawa… are you okay?"

"Perfectly fine."

"I wonder what she's doing with him all the time. They look pretty close. Think she's started dating him yet?"

" _Yet"?_ There was something about the word that made me go rigid. I rolled my shoulders to rid myself of tight muscles.

"I don't care."

Watanabe calculated me, like he was sensing my unrest.

"Okay."

We made it to our next class without another hitch, though I couldn't stop thinking about that one little line… _"Think she's dating him yet?"_

Was she? Shot nerves ran up my shoulders again.

 _Whatever_ , I said to myself, _Who cares if she is or isn't?_

Certainly not me.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter Twenty**

A flash blinked across the table at breakfast.

"Looking good!" My mother snapped another picture, "Smile, Kotoko." Another flash blinded me. The hatred I held for her camera seized me and I bit my tongue as I migrated from the table to the couch.

"Oh, Naoki, you would be like that. It's your very last day of high school! Don't you want pictures?" My mother said with a dejected look.

"No, so please refrain from taking any of me." As if there weren't enough pictures she'd taken of me, what with those four photo album's worth of baby photos.

"Don't be like that." She said, but I ignored it. She wouldn't be having any pictures of me today, whether it was graduation or not.

Despite me, she tailed Kotoko around and snapped a million and two pictures of her. They eventually made it to the living room where Kotoko posed per my mother's instructions.

"Beautiful! Look up just a bit more, and…" A flash flooded across the room, "Click. Now, sit on the chair."

Kotoko danced over to the chair and made a bunch of cheesy poses. My mother took a few more pictures.

"Just pretend Naoki is behind the camera." She said. Kotoko's face reddened. There was another click.

"Okay, behind the chair." It took Kotoko a moment to grasp the new directions and then hopped up. She flew behind the chair and posed.

"So cute. Say cheese," She took the picture, "Lean a little more to that side… right, perfect!" Her father eyed them with a sad expression.

"I can't believe this is the last day seeing Kotoko in her uniform." He seemed ready to cry.

Kotoko grinned, "It's okay, dad."

"Let's take some pictures outside," My mother bounded for the door in excitement, then bounded back, "Wait, how about we take a picture of you and Naoki?" Initially, I grinded my teeth together.

Kotoko peered at me, as if knowing the answer without even having to ask. She was fixed with disappointment.

"I don't think he'd want to." She said.

 _Oh, so she thinks she can read my mind, can she?_ I made up my mind and made for the door.

"Only one." I said.

"What?" Kotoko was astonished and then she was ecstatic.

"Well, come on! I doubt we'd get another chance like this." My mother said, and that was true. But she should have blamed herself for the way I hated pictures.

They both skipped out the door. My mother directed us to the front of the house. Kotoko stood an awkward two feet away, smiling like an idiot.

"Get closer." My mother swished her hand in the air as if that would magically push us together. Kotoko scooched closer a few inches, sillily embarrassed. It was hard not to laugh at her.

"Closer!" My mother said. She wouldn't have been happy until I did, so I wrapped my arm around Kotoko's shoulder and pulled her the closest she'd probably ever been.

Her mouth fell open and she grinned the shock away.

"There you go, that's wonderful." My mother readied to take the picture and I got an idea.

"You've got bread crumbs on your face." I whispered to Kotoko. She pulled away the second the flash went off, looking mortified. I laughed at her.

"That's one. I'm leaving now." I said and reached inside the door for my coat. Kotoko rushed to do the same.

Halfway down the street, she ran up to my side.

"Since it's the last day, can we walk together?" She asked hopefully.

"Fine."

She looked so happy she could've popped. She was quiet for a few minutes and that was all. After that, she got started and didn't stop.

"Time sure flies, doesn't it?" She said, "I can't believe high school ends today. I enjoyed this year the most out of my last three."

"Is that so? I suffered more this year than the last eighteen combined." This did not faze her.

"Where are you going tonight for your graduation party? Class F is going to Katsu."

"I don't know." I said. She yakked for the rest of the trip.

At Tonan, we went our separate ways. In Class A, everyone was laid back and relaxed, all so ready to be done with Tonan and get on to college. With all of our work done, we (though more everyone else) conversed with each other about colleges, Hikari and Yoshida battled it out one last time, and the atmosphere was generally calm.

"Irie," Watanabe said, coming toward me with Wada, "We were just talking about where to go later. Do you have any suggestions?" I thought of something fun. It would definitely make my night more eventful.

"How about Katsu?"

"Katsu?" Wada said, "I hadn't thought of that place. I like it."

"Yeah, that sounds nice. Let's go ask Hikari and Yoshida. Unless there are any objections, that's the place."

I could already see Kinnosuke's reaction to Class A being in the same place as them. It was so satisfying.

No more than a minute later, Watanabe came back and gave the thumbs up. Katsu it was. This night was going to be entertaining.

We went about our class schedules for another hour and then we were dismissed to the gymnasium where rows of chairs had filled with students and their family members. I found my mother the moment another God-awful flash went off. She waved at me from the back of the room, and then at Kotoko as she and her friends entered.

The assembly began. Our school principal made a speech about our lives and how great a year it had been. After names started being called. Lines formed as diplomas were received by every senior at Tonan.

When my name was called, I couldn't help but notice the series of flashes coming from the back of the room.

The principal held out the diploma for me to take, "Congratulations. You have completed your high school education." I took it and bowed, returning to my seat.

Kotoko was called up some time later. She tripped going up and it made me snigger. Kinnosuke cried as he took his, which I rolled my eyes to.

"I bid you farewell, students. You are graduated." My principal said. People began standing and leaving. Kotoko and her friends bawled as they made their way out.

I prepared myself for leaving. With all the superstitions that went on about graduation day around here, I knew I was about to be swarmed.

Sure enough, five or so girls crowded around me as I left the building.

"Irie-kun, can I have your second button?" One said.

"No."

"Can I get a picture with you?"

"No."

"Will you sign my yearbook?"

"No."

If there was even a single person here that could have convinced me to do those things, it was Kotoko. But unluckily for these girls, they weren't her.

Hurrying to be away from this swarm of shameless girls, I ran into someone. Of course she would have been here in this crowd of insects.

"Irie… Can I have your second button?" She asked and gave me one of her famous smiles.

 _No, no, no, you can't just do that and think I'll say yes._

"No." I tried to escape her and the rest of them. She tugged on my arm.

"You don't have to be so mean. I just want something to remember you by." She said, which was a lie, considering that the whole "second button" thing had to do with someone's devotion to another.

"We're going to the same college. You don't need anything to remember me by."

"Oh, come on. Please?" She batted her eyelashes at me, smiling like mad. I stared at her.

"No."

" _Please_? It's just a button." Becoming agitated with the badgering, my resolve snapped in half. I just wanted to go home and get this all over with.

" _Fine_." I said. Before I could change my mind, I popped off the button and slapped it into her hand before squeezing my way through the crowd to go home.

" _Thank you, Irie-kun!_ " Kotoko shouted through the crowd.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter Twenty-One**

I'd thought tonight would be fun, but no. It was a mistake coming here instead of some other restaurant.

As Class A and I arrived at our tables, I spotted Kinnosuke and Kotoko. Those two were _always_ together. He reached over and brushed something off of her face. For what was she always letting him touch her like that? There was no reason unless she liked him too.

The image gnawed at me, so I looked away. My back and shoulders formed a mess of twisted knots. I had no idea why I was so angry, but I didn't want to stand around watching this.

Kotoko pulled away from him as she saw me.

"Irie…" She said. Kinnosuke whipped his head around so fast he must've made himself dizzy. I could see in that moment how much he truly hated my guts.

Class A and I took our seats at our tables, and I made sure I was as far away from those two as I could be. Class F threw a fit, though particularly Kinnosuke. They stopped eating and glared at us as we sat.

Their eating picked back up. Kinnosuke whined quite a bit more, and then his irritating voice was amplified by a microphone.

"Now, Class F would like to call up their teacher to make a speech!" He yelled. The teacher would have been able to hear him well enough without the microphone.

It was the most quiet I'd ever seen Class F as their teacher came to the microphone. Our teacher laughed to himself. The hatred going from Class A to Class F went all ways. Even the teachers despised each other.

"Congratulations on your graduation, Class F. There may have been people who looked down on you, but you never let it get you down and you've made it." He said. A few shed tears. My teacher stood and strutted to the front of the room. He would never have let this fly without getting a few words in. Their teacher continued.

"Three years I have fought with you, and I am proud of all of you."

My teacher intervened.

"For three years, I have been the teacher of the most intelligent batch of students I have known. I consider myself lucky." He said. All of Class F was silent and they turned to stare at who was disrupting their party.

"Waseda, Keioh, Jyochi, and so many more of you have made their way into prestigious schools, and for that I am proud to call myself your teacher."

"But the reason we could get into such good schools was because we had such an amazing teacher." Hikari said, clearly trying to also pluck some nerves over in Class F's dinner.

"You are good with compliments, Hikari. Thank you." Class F fired back.

"Okay, now I will say this loud and clear!" Their teacher said. I hadn't noticed before, but he was just as loud as they were, "Life is not all about studying, and you are young! You should be living your life as you want! Academic performance is not the only way to measure a person!" Class F cheered, agreeing with their teacher and shooting Class A some awful looks. My teacher wouldn't take it.

"Students who have low scores have a hard time getting into college, and in turn have a hard time succeeding in life and finding a job. I am so glad you don't have to suffer like that." Class A applauded, but I didn't feel the need. I crossed my arms, waiting for this night to just be over.

"Who do you think you are?" Class F's teacher said to mine, "Just because you're a little smarter, you have the right to come in here like that?"

"What? I never said anything about you or Class F. Did my speech pinch some nerves?" Class A laughed, but I wasn't entertained by this. I wanted to leave.

"People on these low levels are always so paranoid." Kobayakawa said. She gave a disgusted look over to Class F.

Kinnosuke marched over to our side and slammed his fist on the wall.

" _What the hell did you say_?" His face turned crimson. He was boiling over.

" _And_ they always turn to violence." Kobayakawa continued.

"What? I'm not the one who's done anything here!" He said, flaring up.

"What else could they do?" I said, "The only way Class F can even try to fight us is with their muscles." I looked over to him. He gawked at me and I could see how badly he wished he could kill me. Kotoko gave me a disgusted look, seemingly hurt. I looked away from them.

 _Whatever_. I thought.

Kinnosuke stormed from the room.

"Kin-chan, wait!" Kotoko called as she ran after him, "Hold on! Where are you going?"

 _Of course she's going after him again._

For a moment after they were gone and the fight sizzled down, I contemplated how crushed she'd looked and I regretted what I'd said. Maybe I should have stayed out of it, but I was so bothered by Kinnosuke that I couldn't find it in me to stay quiet.

Watanabe found me then, "That was insane." He said.

"I suppose."

"They seemed pretty upset. Don't you think someone should make sure they're okay?"

"They'll be fine." I said. Watanabe pondered over me, the way he'd been doing all month, all week, and all day.

"You're sure you don't want to check on her?" He said.

"Why would I want to do that?"

"Well, you… never mind." He looked awkward, like he wanted to disappear.

"I what?"

"Nothing. I'll talk to you later. The teacher wanted to talk to me about something." He said and ran off.

Bored so far, from the events of tonight, I decided to find a bathroom to kill some time. I slipped through the door, going unnoticed by my classmates, and started down the long hall. Up ahead, bickering echoed through the halls. Finding a bathroom became the lesser objective.

"... don't know why you do these things! The room is fine!" I heard Kotoko say. I came closer to the source.

"I just wanted everyone to have a good night. Those guys ruined it." Kinnosuke said.

"Ignore them." Was the last thing I heard before both of them quieted down. I wondered what was going on ahead of me now.

I rounded a corner. What I found stunned me. From the angle I was at, it sure looked like it, but there was no way they were…

 _Kissing?_

I stopped dead in my tracks. Anger pulled at every last one of my muscles. Maybe I had been wrong. Maybe she was dating him. The center of my forehead pounded.

Her eye caught me from far away and she shoved Kinnosuke away. Given the way she looked at me, it must've been what it had looked like.

"I'll see you when you get back." She said and dashed by me to go back to the rooms.

"What do you want?" Kinnosuke said. He looked so smuck, "Did you come here to find out what's been going on between me and Kotoko?" So, there had been something going on between them. I continued past him, again on the lookout for a bathroom.

"Are you jealous? Hey, why so silent? Wait a sec." He caught up with me and grabbed my shoulder. If he dared to touch me one more time, I swore I could have just about torn his arm from its socket.

"While you're slacking at college, I'm going to be out doing things you can't do. I promised Kotoko."

"It's cool if someone who _could_ go to college says that, but that you couldn't just sounds like sour grapes." I said. It seemed to strike a nerve.

"That's not all. Tonight, I am going to kiss Kotoko." Kinnosuke said. But if they hadn't already, then what was that I saw?

"You should only dream when you are sleeping." I tried to leave again, only to be stopped. I shot him a warning glare and he snatched his hand away from my shoulder.

"Don't be so sure about that. She is the one who asked me here today. At the end of high school, she's finally realizing who cares about her the most. It's too late for you to be jealous, Mr. Genius." Kinnosuke left me in the hall, waves of dread washing over me. I was paralyzed, shocked.

And then I snapped out of it. If she was over me, it was a good thing. This was what I'd been wanting to happen all this time, wasn't it? My life could start going back to the way it was. No more disastrous occurrences and cursed charms. But there was something about the thought of it that didn't hold well with me.

I found my way to the bathroom to cool down before going back. Inside the cool, dimly lit bathroom, I rubbed my forehead and rested my eyes for a moment. I took a deep breath and left to back to the rooms.

Once back at the room, there was a lot of commotion. I entered to find that both parties of Class A and F had been moved together, Kotoko in the middle of it all. She giggled raucously with everyone.

That was at least until Ayo said something to her.

"You sure are happy, aren't you? Considering this all went the way you wanted it to. Thanks to you, Irie-kun didn't go to Tokyo University. Because you're stupid, you disturbed a smart person's life." Didn't anyone think I was capable of making my own decisions? Or was it possible for them to mind their own business. Kotoko's face fell from upbeat to downtrodden.

"It wasn't her fault," I said. Ayo looked scandalized, "Why would I give up Tokyo University for this idiot?" It was actually a question I'd been asking myself a lot. Why _would_ I? I had no clue.

Kotoko gave me her meanest look, "Idiot?"

"That's right," My teacher said, "Someone as smart as Irie wouldn't ruin his life for one measly girl."

" _I'm a measly girl_?" She said, becoming angry. But it wasn't a scary kind of angry. It was more like when a puppy growls.

"Now that I think about it, there's no way he would like someone as hopeless as her. What a waste of time to believe those rumors." Ayo said.

"I am not a hopeless girl!" Kotoko said, having had enough, "I think you're all very rude. It's true that I had some help from Irie… and may have caused him a little trouble along the way…"

"A little?" I said. Because causing rumors to spread about me, almost causing me to fail exams, and blackmailing me was just 'a little' trouble.

She bit her lip, "I mean a lot. But just the way you said it… you're so cold."

"Cold or not, you're still in love with me, aren't you?" I said. Kotoko scowled and cringed.

"But it was all Aihara's power of love," Watanabe said, "They're destined to be together." I could finally figure it out, all those looks he'd been fixing me with. It was over this.

"Don't be ridiculous." I said crossly.

"Wait, look at it this way. Thanks to the charm she made you for the pre-test, you fell down the stairs. You missed your train, all your pencils were broken…"  
"That's not the power of love, that's a curse." Waseda said.

"No, it's the reverse power of love. She gave him her love letter and it was rejected. And then her house collapsed."

Giggles decorated the air around us, "Amazing," Waseda said, "A woman who brings a storm."

"By the way, did she give you something on Valentine's Day?" Hikari asked.

"Yeah, a really dumb chocolate heart. And on New Year's, she gave me this bizarre head massager." More people laughed.

"That's so funny!"

"Weird taste."

"Well, she _is_ a headache."

I read humiliation and seething anger on her as easy as it was to read pages of a book.

"Awesome! It's like a secret-revealing contest. Who's next?" Waseda shouted and everyone became involved from there. People started yelling secrets and pointing at each other. Kotoko stood there like her circuit had burned out.

"The secret-revealing contest is fun." She mumbled, coming back to life. She stared me dead in the face, "Well, if you're going that far, then you better be prepared for this."

"What is it?"

"You think you don't have any secrets?"

"That's right."

Kotoko cackled, thoroughly amused with herself, "Even geniuses have weaknesses, remember?"

It jolted me into silence.

"It can't be." There was no way she had another picture. She couldn't. She wouldn't actually go through with exposing this, would she?

And just like from the first week I knew her, she pulled that picture out of her pocket and dangled it before me like bait. Only there was nothing I could do about it with this sea of eyes on us.

"Ta-da!"

Her friends skidded forward and grabbed at the picture.

"What is this? Wait! Irie, this is you, isn't it?" One of them said.

"Yes, it is! He looks just like a girl!" The other exclaimed and then everyone else swarmed around the picture to see it. This had to be a nightmare.

The photo swam around, going from eye to eye until everyone had seen it.

"How did you get that?" I said to her disgustedly.

"Your mom gave me another one." She said with a fitting, devilish smile, "I treasured it in my train pass folder… a childhood picture of someone I _love_ … but it turned me off, because this looks..." She snatched the picture back from the audience, "Like a girl." Everyone laughed. I wanted to hide. This was so humiliating. My mother would be lucky if I wanted anything to do with her after this, considering that she'd caused all this by putting this secret into hands which were unreliable to keep it.

"Now you know how it feels to be laughed at. Not fun, is it?" Kotoko giggled and waved the thing in my face. I tried to grab it, but it fell to the floor and was picked up by someone else to circulate the room. I opted to get out of this mess and I wasn't going alone.

I seized Kotoko's wrist, "Come with me." I said and dragged her from the room, amid the "aww"s that escaped everyone's mouth. I didn't even know what I was going to say to her when we were alone, but I was so furious that it didn't matter. I grinded my teeth, my veins popping and my shoulders tense.

Out in the hallway, my eyes landed on an escape landing at the other end. I pulled her toward it.

"Ow! Hey, where are you taking me?" Kotoko struggled. I threw the door open. We stepped outside and I shut it. She leaned against the rail.

"What is it?" Kotoko frowned at me.

"You had to cause such a big fuss in there, huh?"

"So what? You made fun of my feelings for you in front of _everyone_! Is it a joke to you?" She was absolutely disgusted with me, "You brought it on yourself by sharing that with them." She eyed me, so upset. I didn't know what to say.

"I quit. I know you so well that it disgusts me and all you ever are is cold, so I'm giving up on you." I looked down on her, searching for any kind of fallacy. There was none. Instead, there was that expression I recognized greatly… that determined one. It was that one that she had when she decided something. When she had that look, she got what she wanted to happen, just like when she wanted on the top 100 list.

She was serious.

"Really? So, you'll just forget about me?" I said, hoping the look would falter. Not even close.

"Yes, I will! I'll find someone else in college and forget you ever existed!" Her determination deepened.

"You go ahead and try, then."

I tilted her chin up and pressed my lips into hers. I was enveloped in warmth. Practically buzzing, I brought her closer. The blood rushed to my head.

When I pulled away, there were so many questions drawn into her eyes. Questions littered even my head.

"Serves you right."

She was still, her brain function seeming to be disrupted. I turned my back on her and returned to the party.


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter Twenty-Two**

Kotoko skipped down the stairs, all clad in a new outfit and ready to begin her college experience. At the table, she shied away from looking my way.

"You look so pretty today," My mother said, "Are you excited?"

"Really excited." Kotoko said, nodding and grinning widely. She caught a glimpse of me and quickly averted her gaze to the floor. My mother got her camera out and took a picture of Kotoko, and then one of me.

"Why don't you two take another picture together?" She said with hope.

"No." I said. Kotoko tensed into stillness.

"But why?" My mother said with a whine.

"Because why would I want to take pictures with someone like her?" I snapped. This was just one of the many times over break before the start of college that I'd said something like that… insulting her, avoiding her… and I wasn't very proud in admitting that. What was more, I didn't know why I was doing it.

I tried to pretend I hadn't seen how stung she looked from that statement.

"I'm leaving." I said and made my way to the door to escape them and their gazes. Naturally, Kotoko followed not far behind. The entire way there, she stayed back and away from me.

At Tonan University, she took off for her own department and I carried on to mine. In the science and engineering department, the atmosphere was calmer than in high school.

A guide directed me to a classroom and I found a seat.

"Naoki Irie." A familiar voice said. Yuuko Matsumoto stole the seat beside me. It had been a few years since I'd last seen her. Yuuko smiled at me, but I noticed the smile wasn't nearly as warm or inviting as Kotoko's.

"It's so nice to see you. It's been such a long time." She said.

"Yeah… So you chose Tonan?" It was strange to see someone like her here, the same way it was strange to see me here. She might've been my exact twin when it came to scores and success.

"The tennis club. There's a great one here. Will you be joining?" She batted her eyes at me, flirting hard. That was one way to start the day.

"I don't think so."

"But why? You're so good at tennis." Yuuko's gaze was unfaltering.

"Just not interested." I said.

"Well that sucks. I was hoping to play doubles with you sometime." She smiled seductively.

The professor arrived and class began.

This class was so similar to Class A that it felt like high school despite not having to wear a uniform. Everyone was quiet, diligently taking notes and listening to the professor until the end of the first class. Yuuko walked out with me.

"You should rethink joining the tennis club. It could really benefit with you." She said.

"We'll see." I said, though what I meant by that was "it's still no". The first thing I noticed as we walked out the front doors was the bright pink sweater sitting on a bench with her friends, right in front of my department. She turned her head to stare at Yuuko and me.

"Have you chosen your elective course yet?" Yuuko asked.

"No. Have you?"

Kotoko was shoved out in front of us. She gave her friends a dirty look. They took off and Kotoko straightened herself up.

"Is there something you want?" I said.

"Oh, nothing." She bit her lip and shoved her hands deep into her sweater pockets. Yuuko smirked and then scoffed.

"Is this your girlfriend?"

"Her? No way." I said. Kotoko looked like I'd slapped her in the face. Her eyes fell and again I ignored it.

For the next two classes before lunch, Yuuko sat beside me in each and chatted it up afterward. I could actually have an intelligent conversation with her. As we spoke, I found many ways in which we were alike. There was something missing from the conversations, though, and I couldn't quite pinpoint what it was.

For lunch we parted as she was going to a cafe for food. I stuck to the college cafeteria. And right up in front of the serving lines was Kotoko, listing the food options out loud. I joined her.

"Do you know how to think inside your brain?" I said and she was startled by me, "Lunch A, please." I said the server. Kotoko started to order.

"I would like lunch-"

"They don't have a lunch F." I said. Fire might've shot from her eyes… but a very small fire. Her anger was never scary.

"I'll have lunch A, too!" She ordered and glared at me.

Both of our lunches were sat in front of us. Though they were supposed to be the same lunch, there was a definite difference in amounts. Kotoko's tray of food was overfilled by what might've been double what she was supposed to get. Mine was barely filled. She looked as confused as I was.

"What's with the difference?" I demanded. The server revealed himself as none other than Kinnosuke. I sighed and my head pounded instantly. There was no escaping that moron.

"You're complaining about the fairness of my servings? The nerve." He said, smuck as ever.

"Kin-chan, what are you doing here?" Kotoko smiled.

"I'm working here during the day to keep an eye on that evil guy. But at night I'll be working at your father's restaurant." He bragged.

"That's great!"

"I'm going to become a great chef. And then you'll see just who the better man is." Kinnosuke said, but he would never be any kind of threat. "What do you have to say to that, Mr. genius?" This nickname he had for me was wearing me impatient.

"I'm just baffled at how a person could revolve their whole life around one girl. I couldn't do that."

"What did you say?" It was so easy to offend him.

"I'll just leave you two alone now." I picked up the tray and brought it to a table, not caring about the portions anymore.

For minutes more, Kotoko stayed up at the counter, talking to Kinnosuke. She giggled some and smiled brightly at him, the way I hadn't been seeing much of. He reached over and brushed a strand of hair out of her face. Frustration and anger jolted up my back. I fought the urge to leave the cafeteria simply because he was here.

Finally his manager got on his case about not working and Kotoko left him to sit with her two friends.

I didn't have peace for much longer. A shaggy-looking guy bumbled into the place, searching all over until he found me. He slammed his hand down on the table.

"Naoki Irie. I hear you weren't planning on joining the tennis club." He said.

"That's right. Who are you?"

"I'm Sudo! Leader of the club." He posed with his hands on his hips and then gulped down my entire glass of water.

"Is that all?"

"No. You really should join our club. We need a player like you. Almost everyone there except for me is hopeless." He whined and seated himself next to me.

"That's not my problem."

"Oh come on. Please?"

"No."

"Don't say that! We really do need someone like you in the club!" Another headache formed in my temples and I gritted my teeth.

"I have no intention of joining any clubs."

"But this one is so right for you." I bit my tongue, clenching and unclenching my fist.

"Fine. Whatever." I said. His eyes widened in excitement.

"Okay!" He yelled, taking flight, "I'll see you later! We meet at four." He flew out of the cafeteria. I caught sight of Kotoko watching. Great. She would be following me there today, as Sudo had revealed a little too much information.

...

At four o'clock, I took off for the club room and Kotoko started tailing me all the way there. I formed a plan in my head and took a wrong staircase. She dodged behind a corner to not be seen by me, but she couldn't have been more noticeable.

Trying to lose her, I purposely entered the wrong club room, leaving as soon as I knew she was out of sight. She fell for the trick and I made for the actual tennis club. Yuuko was already there when I arrived.

"So, you're here." She said happily.

"Yeah. Sudo somehow knew I wasn't joining and badgered me at lunch." I said. Yuuko grinned guiltily.

"Sorry about that. But I really wanted you to join." I nodded. I'd figured as much already. Sudo came through the door and bounced to the moon and back when he saw me.

"You're here!" He called, "Good." He went to the front of the room to prepare for an introductory speech, I presumed.

The door busted open.

"I would like to join this club!" Kotoko wailed. So she'd found me. Yet another way I couldn't get away from her.

"Who are you?" Sudo asked, "Who is your referral?"

"I don't have a referral, but I just really want to join the tennis club! It looks like so much fun." She bared her teeth in a grin. But I had news for her… that smile wouldn't work for everyone. There were requirements for this club.

Sudo lifted an eyebrow and made his way over to her, "Anyone with enthusiasm is welcome to join!" He squeezed her shoulders in a hug, "What's your name?"

"Kotoko Aihara."

I could already see this club being a nightmare. Kotoko playing a sport? Surely, nothing good was going to come from it. I wondered what was going to happen next when it came to her, because it seemed her reign of terror wasn't anywhere near over.


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter Twenty-Three**

Sudo sighed, waiting to be able to begin the first practice of the season. He was held up by none other than one student who had not yet come from the locker rooms. Kotoko.

Five minutes late, she dashed for the court and smiled eagerly.

"Now that everyone's here…" Sudo said, "For today's first practice, there is going to be a little test for the newcomers. We'll just be taking a look at your skills set."

Kotoko pondered over this test and then looked frightened of it. Sudo went on.

"For this test, you'll be playing me in one short match. Try your best." Relief poured into her.

"Good thing it's only Sudo." She whispered.

"Not for you." I said.

"What? Why?"

"Just watch. You'll see why."

Sudo walked peppily to the other side of the net where he picked up his tennis racket. Whenever he touched one, it was as though he became possessed by it. His face twisted into a mask of utter fury.

"Wada! To the court!" He yelled. Wada jumped from the outburst and sprinted to the court.

As quickly as Wada was in position, Sudo served him a lightning-fast ball, practically ambushing him.

"What are you just standing there for? Hit it back! Have you never played a sport in your life?" Sudo yapped, going absolutely nuts. Kotoko's face had long since drained and she was a statue of panic.

"He's called "Sudo the Demon"." I told her. She nodded, having gotten it already and needing no explanation.

"Next!" Sudo said, "Yano, come!" Yano ran quicker than Wada had, and he had the chance to at least try to hit the ball back over to the other side, but he wasn't quick enough.

I watched as member after member was ambushed and failed Sudo's test. That was until he came to one particular name on the list of his.

"Yuuko Matsumoto," He said in an almost gentle voice, "Your turn." This time, Sudo actually waited for his opponent to be fully ready and then he served it.

Yuuko was able to hit it back without any difficulty. They battled away and I noticed Kotoko watching Yuuko's playing in awe.

"Matsumoto's so good." Kotoko said.

"She made it to third place in the women's singles tournament when she was in high school and was smart enough to go to any university she wanted. But she came here because Tonan has a great tennis club."

"How do you know all that?" Kotoko asked.

"I met her at the National Tournament in the first year of high school." Her eyes dropped back over to the match happening and she bit her lip. Yuuko finally missed.

"Good job," Sudo said in the first spoken congratulatory word of the practice, "Next. Irie Naoki." He uttered my name like it was a foul taste in his mouth.

Unshaken, I stole the other side of the court. He started and I was ready, hitting the ball over the net hard. He hit back harder. With him focusing too hard on beating me and a little slow to recover from such a hard hit, I found my opportunity and took it. I returned the ball to him. Sudo missed.

His face turned scarlet with frenzy. I turned to leave the court, having passed the test.

"Wait a minute! I want a rematch!" Sudo said. Still, I left him on the court. If I'd let it, this would go on forever. And it was only a test.

" _Next! Aihara Kotoko!_ " Sudo screeched as I made it back. Kotoko flinched. She scampered up to the court.

"Don't go so slow!" He snapped and she hurried it up. Kotoko raised her hand as Sudo was about to ambush her.

"Wait!" She said, "I've never played tennis before."

"I don't care!" Sudo whipped the ball at her, which she ran from screaming. Her flailing was too funny and I was overcome with laughter.

"What's her problem?" Yuuko asked me. I took a moment to choke down my amusement.

"That's just the way she is." I said.

"Get back here! We're trying again, and don't run away this time!"

"Sorry!" Kotoko barrelled for the court again.

This time, as if it was almost intentional, Sudo served it and it popped her right on the nose, sending her to the ground.

"Oh no, Aihara's fainted." Someone behind me said. I was sent off into a laughing fit, unable to contain myself. She overreacted to everything.

Kotoko composed herself after a moment and Sudo sent her back to the group. He continued his rampage on the last few members and then practice was over.

"Hey," Yuuko said on the way to the locker rooms, "How do you know Aihara?"

"I live with her." I said, easily admitting it since there was no point in hiding it. She could have just as easily found it out on her own from one of the new students here. With that, she was silent until we reached the locker rooms.


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: Happy Valentine's Day to anyone reading. Hope you had a wonderful day. ^.^**

 **Chapter Twenty-Four**

I couldn't think, couldn't focus. College should have been the first thing on my mind since I'd just started it last week, but there was something poking me from the back of my mind. And while it poked, it wouldn't speak. Tonight, studying wasn't coming to me easily so I took off for the convenience store where I sometimes got canned coffee.

Thankfully it wasn't cold outside anymore. Aside from a very slight chill, the walk to the store was relaxing. I got the coffee from the machine and left. Popping it open, I took a drink. It was as bitter as always.

There was another jab at me from somewhere inside my mind. I rubbed my shoulders. Out the door, I turned to make my way home and found an absentminded somebody gazing into the night sky.

"What are you looking at?" I said to her. Kotoko came to attention.

"Oh, hey," She said, "Going home now? Where were you?"

I showed her my coffee, "What about you?" I asked.

"I went to my father's restaurant." I gritted my teeth.

"Your father's restaurant?"

"Yes." She said. It gnawed at me. She must've been there with that numbskull, Kinnosuke.

"Were you seeing that guy?" I said, the words spilling from my mouth before I could control them. I wished I hadn't asked.

"Guy?" Kotoko seemed confused, so I could easily back out of the question.

"Never mind."

"I was there with my father. We talked about moving out. He says he's found a nice place to live near Tonan." The usual sparkle that surrounded her when she smiled was dull. An icy feeling entered me and swept through my veins. I didn't like this.

"What?"

"He hasn't signed the lease yet, but he will soon. We've been living with your family for a long time now. So…" She said, not looking too happy about it, either.

 _No. This is good. I can get back to normal._ I disagreed with my initial reaction and shook it off.

"So, you're moving out?" Saying it was a bitter taste in my mouth. Kotoko studied me and then she nodded.

"Are you going to miss us?"

 _Yes_. My mind fired out, but I wasn't about to say that and give her the wrong idea. So I didn't answer.

"Irie-kun?" Kotoko said. I finally thought of something I could say.

"My life can finally get back to the way it was." I said and left her.

…

"No! I don't agree with this." My mother cried at Kotoko's father later that night, or so I heard from the hall, "I don't want you and Kotoko to move out!"

"Calm down…" My father said.

"But, honey!"

"Thank you so much for everything you've done for us," Mr. Aihara said, "But I've made up my mind about this."

"You don't have to rush. We really _do_ want you to stay as long as you want, and you do pay your share of the rent." My father said. I leaned against the wall. That icy cold feeling took hold of me again.

"No, I think we'd better get moving now. We've taken advantage of your kindness for too long."

"No, really…"

"And by doing this, Kotoko can maybe start giving up on Naoki. With them separated, I hope I can see her happier." A wrench was thrown into my gut. _I_ was the reason they were moving.

"I can convince Naoki that they would be a great couple." My mother said and I fought the urge to make myself known to argue with her on that point.

"This is a matter between only them." Mr. Aihara said.

My mother choked on some sobs, "It's not that I would accept any girl. I really like her cheerfulness, her guts, and loveliness." She sniffed.

"Kotoko would be very happy to know you were saying these things. I'm sorry, but we will be going."

It was only then that I noticed Yuuki was also listening in on the conversation. I went upstairs and back to my studies where none of the words in the textbooks held meaning. I still couldn't focus on them.

Yuuki bounced into the room.

"She's moving!" He howled and flopped onto his bed, "Now she won't be able to spread her stupidity germ around anymore." He looked to me, as if waiting for me to agree, but I didn't utter a word. He continued his fit of excitement.

" _I'm so happy_! I'm going to have my room back!"

I simply sat there at a loss for words and not understanding why I couldn't study at all. My mind was blank for once.


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter Twenty-Five**

Kotoko carried the last suitcase from the house and out to the moving truck parked in our driveway. This was it, then. My mother was too upset to speak, frowning as Kotoko and her father backed out of the driveway and were gone.

I migrated to my bedroom where Yuuki still hung around. He peered out the window as if it was too good to be true and was just waiting for them to come back. I picked up a book to numb myself to the sensation of this change. Their moving was so abrupt, there wasn't even any time to prepare for it. They'd started packing the night my parents and I were told. Within a few days, they'd disappeared from the house, leaving no trace they were ever there except for Yuuki's old bedroom that had but a few pink remnants left.

Yuuki sat himself up on my bed, his having been moved into his bedroom earlier today, "Life is good. Looks like she's really not coming back." He smiled, but the words stung somehow.

"Yup." I said, feeling hollow.

Across the hall, there was scraping against the floor. The complete moving of furniture had begun. Yuuki took off to watch. With nothing else to do, I figured I would help my mother in moving it all back to the way it was.

It wasn't my mother moving the furniture, but my father which was abnormal.

"Where's mom?" Yuuki said as my father slid the desk over to the window.

"She's really upset, so I'll be doing the work today." My father said. Yuuki narrowed his eyes.  
"It's _just_ stupid Kotoko." He said. My father stopped in his tracks.

"You may not have liked her much, but don't say something like that around your mother right now. It is not the day." My father eyed him with a look of ' _don't test me_ '.

Yuuki crossed the room and sat on his bed. Some time ago, this would have felt normal, but it really only felt wrong.

"Need any help?" I asked.

"No, thanks. But if you could try to cheer up your mother, that would be nice." He started scooting a light pink chair from the room, the last of its pink kind.

I went downstairs to find the whole place completely silent. There was no hustle and bustle between my mother and Kotoko, or Yuuki making fun of her only for her to chase him around or make a face at him. It was as though the place was empty.

My mother had locked herself in her bedroom, so there would be no talking to her. I wasn't sure I would've been the best person to talk to her as is, since I was one of the main reasons they'd moved.

I made for my bedroom again to try and get some work done, read, or anything, but there was nothing I was interested in doing at this very moment. Before meeting Kotoko, this had never been a problem before. I guess after so many times of her disrupting me or talking to me, I'd become accustomed to not doing the things I usually did.

I tried to delve back into my book, but the words swam. Outright frustrated, I put it back down and held my head in my hands, internally screaming at myself.

 _What's wrong with you? You never had problems reading or working until recently. Why can't you focus on_ anything _?_

I grounded my teeth together. Truthfully, I was going to miss having Kotoko around. Admitting that, even if only in my head, was like a stab to my mentality. Since when did I like having her around even a little? All she ever did was trip, make messes, and give me bad luck, so wasn't it better that she was gone?

As I'd been wanting all this time, I could revert to the way things were before her. But I was beginning to question if that _was_ what I wanted. She may have made my life a living hell while she was here, but it was enjoyable. I must've been turning into a masochist.

"Onii-san!" Yuuki called from across the hall. I gratefully left my head and entered reality where other people still existed. I meandered across the hall to his bedroom. All was in tip-top shape. It was as though he'd never left it in the first place… as though she was never even here.

I tensed and ice ran through me.

"Look, it's all back to normal!" He said, a satisfied grin spread across his face and his hands on his hips.

"Are you okay, Naoki?" My father said, studying me through his glasses.

"Why wouldn't I be?" I said and forced the ice from my body, "It's great, Yuuki. We can finally have our rooms back." I offered him a small smile to show that I approved. Out in the hall, I realized something and my tense shoulders loosened some.

Kotoko and I went to the same college. I could see her sometimes, maybe. That wasn't enough to stop the dread that poured over me. I didn't sleep well that night.


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N: I was thinking of spacing out the posting of this fanfic more. After today, the posting days will be Tuesdays and Fridays, not limited to just the weekend. I may occasionally post on a Sunday as well. Enjoy. 3**

 **Chapter Twenty-Six**

I may as well have been going to Tokyo University with as little as I saw of Kotoko over the next week. I hadn't been going to the tennis club practices because she'd failed Sudo's test and wasn't on the court, plus I didn't need the practice. And then there would be the interaction with Yuuko. While I was friends with her and didn't mind her company, she flirted.

Home after another whole day of things feeling out of whack, I came through the front door to hear a conversation between my father and Yuuki. They were preparing supper for later, yet again.

"Put in the eggs…" My father said and there was a crack, "Bread crumbs now." I wandered into the kitchen, catching Yuuki throwing some bread crumbs into a bowl.

"She still hasn't snapped out of it, huh?" I said. My mother had been making more than a big deal out of Kotoko and her father moving. She barely came out of her room and she didn't want to eat, clean, or make supper. It had all been left up to the three of us. We had been splitting the chores since they left.

My father left to grab some more paper towels and Yuuki went on, kneading some sort of mixture as my father had instructed.

"I hope she stops being like that soon. It _is_ only Kotoko after all." He said. I nodded.

 _It's only Kotoko_. I reminded myself. I'd been getting worked up over nothing.

I went to my room to read. I could've heard a pin drop all the way downstairs, the house was so quiet. I hadn't noticed how much I'd grown into the noise of having Kotoko living here. With it gone, there was an empty space. While I'd used to hate the excessive noise, the silence was even worse.

Even if I didn't need the practice, it would be better than being in all this quiet so I got dressed, packed my tennis equipment and left for the practice that had begun ten minutes earlier. Sudo was the kind of person that cared a lot about attendance and being on time, but I was one of the only exceptions there were. He was lucky I'd decided to join in the first place. One would assume he was going to take what he could get from me.

Arriving to the courts, Sudo welcomed me as he thankfully hadn't had a tennis racket in his hand. Yuuko made right for me from practicing her serves.

"You're late." She said. I looked around the court for Kotoko.

"Looking for someone?" Yuuko asked. I spotted her. She was picking up the balls everyone was using and replacing them in baskets… probably the only thing she would do in her time here. Yuuko followed my line of sight.

"It's true she moved out of your house, right? You know, that cafeteria guy is saying she moved because she got over you. I think the two are dating now." An unfamiliar feeling crept over me, a mix of many emotions. I clenched my jaw shut, not wanting to hear about Kinnosuke. As days wore on, my disliking for him festered.

"Who cares?" I said. Yuuko nodded.

"Would you like to pair up for a bit of practice?"

"Sure, just give me a minute." She took off to serve some more balls and I made my way over to Kotoko. Her eyes were so trained on the ground and the balls, she didn't see me.

" _Picking up balls_ ," She mumbled, " _Like that's practice._ " I stepped on one of them to capture her attention.

"Excuse me, you are stepping on a ball. Kindly remove your foot." She said. I half-smiled at it.

"You're only collecting balls?" I said. She looked up at me swiftly.

"Irie-kun… but what are you doing here?" She blinked at me, as if she thought she might've been hallucinating.

"I'm in the tennis club."

"But you don't practice. You haven't come once since the first week." She said. I dodged it and lifted my foot off the ball to join Yuuko.

"Am I not allowed to come?" She watched me walk away. Her admiration told me all I needed to know.

"Irie, it's rare that you come to practice," Sudo said, approaching Yuuko and I, "Might you have come here to have a duel with me?" He reached for his racket and his face became similar to that of a provoked bull.

"I can duel you, but I don't want to embarrass you again." I said, pushing his buttons. He glared at me.

"So cocky," he growled, "If that's so, would you agree to doubles?" He looked like he had something up his sleeve, but I wasn't chicken.

"Sure."

Sudo smirked, "Okay, I'll pair with Matsumoto… you can pair with Aihara." I didn't shock me he was doing something like this, since he was such a competitive person and sore loser. But this exasperated me. Of course it was her.

Kotoko's eyes widened, "What? _Me?_ "

"She's only collecting balls. I can't pair with her. We wouldn't be equal."

"Matsumoto and Aihara are both freshmen girls. I'd say the pairing is quite fair." He grinned viciously. I snapped.

"That's not fair in any sense. If you could win in doubles each time against a person like her, you'd become the world champion." I fired at him.

"You don't have to go _that_ far." Kotoko said.

"He's right, though." Yuuko said. I could see there was no further argument as Sudo situated himself on the court.

"Aihara, get to the court. Let's begin."

"Sorry, but I never go easy on anyone." Yuuko said to me as she went by to get to the other side. I peered over to Kotoko and let out a sigh of frustration. This match was essentially two against one. She was reluctant to play.

"What's with that look? Do you forfeit? That's pretty pitiful." Sudo said, but I wouldn't be having him gloat about this. I marched over to where Kotoko stood.

"You won't have to hit the ball. Just leave it to me." I said, resigning to my fate.

"We're actually going to do this?" She asked worriedly.

"Yes," I said, "Anyway, just stand in your place. And stay out of my way." I walked back into place and she ambled up to my side, stiffly holding a racket.

Sudo served. I went for the ball and she dove out of the way. Yuuko hit it back my way, an easier ball to catch.

Sudo got it next and hit it way over to Kotoko, causing her to spring out of the way. I wasn't there to catch it and like that, Sudo was already ahead.

The match went way downhill from there. I managed a measly five points while theirs went on to infinity. Kotoko dodged out of the way as much as she could, but Sudo only ever hit the ball her way or completely rocketed it at me. By the end of the match, I was exhausted and Kotoko had fallen to the ground multiple times.

Sudo took his last serve, whipping the ball at Kotoko like a bullet. For once, she didn't run away and tried to hit it, but I'd already gone to get it. The only thing we hit was each other's rackets. The duel was over.

"Winners, Sudo and Matsumoto." Someone announced. Sudo beamed.

"Too bad. It was close, wasn't it, Irie?" He bragged, "You two make a good pair."

We shook hands.

"How about another match with these pairs next week?" He smuckly tested me, waiting for me to say no. I refused. This would be more interesting than doing nothing at home, anyway.

"Sure thing." I said. Sudo seemed stunned, and then he was pleased.

"You're serious?" He was befuddled by me.

"Unless you don't want to risk the chance I might embarrass you…"

"Fine!" Sudo huffed, "Next week. Same pairs. I'll be looking forward to it." He strutted away and Kotoko looked doomed. Well, not as doomed as I was going to be with her as a partner. However, part of me was excited about it. This would be fun.


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter Twenty-Seven**

I checked the court entrance again and bit back my agitation over this. Late. If Kotoko was going to be able to stand any chance of playing properly, she needed to be on time so I could practice with her. It was going to be lots of work but I figured it was worth it in the end. With her gone from the house, I was bored out of my mind so I was actually quite willing.

Kotoko crept through the gates as though I wouldn't have noticed. I marched over to where she was tip-toeing.

"You're late." I said.

She straightened up guiltily, "I'm sorry. My teacher extended the class." She smiled, twinkling with radiance. I let it go.

"I don't need excuses. Let's just start practicing." I said dully, ready for all the complications.

"Hold it!" Sudo shouted and strutted forward, "Aihara never passed the test, therefore I cannot allow her to play. She has to collect balls." He seemed pretty pleased with himself, making things so much more tricky than they needed to be.

"But we only have one week."

"A rule is a rule," He turned to Kotoko, "Why are you standing there doing nothing? Get the balls!" She got right to it in almost twice the speed.

" _I'm sorry, but I can't._ " She said to me as she sped by. I sighed. Impossible. Sudo was impossible and so immature. It wasn't as though this was even a real game.

So I did the only thing I could do for now.

I squatted next to where she was working, "Don't look at the ground when it comes to you. Keep your eyes on the ball and don't run away. Run _toward_ it." I said lowly so Sudo wouldn't hear.

Kotoko nodded. I went on to practice with Yuuko for the rest of the hour, wasting time. Kotoko, for that entire time, slacked even in picking up balls, but she seemed to watch the players more. She followed balls with her eyes as they were served, even getting hit a few times.

 _I know I told you not to run away, but you don't have to get hit with them_. I thought, releasing a chuckle as she was hit in the foot and hopped up.

"What's so funny?" Yuuko asked. I shook away the laughter.

Once practice was dismissed and Kotoko went to get dressed, I grabbed her by the arm, "We're going to practice now."

"But I'm tired. I was looking at balls, too, and got hit with a lot of them." She pouted.

"We don't have a choice since you can't practice during club hours." I said. She hung her head and groaned.

"Swing your racket 100 times." I ordered. Her deliverance was sloppy at best, so the structure with which she served and hit needed to be reconstructed before anything else could happen today.

She closed her eyes, resigning to it. She raised the racket in her hand and stopped short. A drop of water hit me in the arm, and then another on my forehead. Perfect.

Kotoko giggled, "It's raining." She tried to catch a drop on her tongue.

"We'll be practicing every morning for the next week. You better start swinging if we're going to get anywhere."

"We're going to practice in the _rain_?" She complained.

" _Yes_ ," I said, "Swing."

She gave in and lifted her arm, bringing the racket down in a loose, powerless swing.

"You have to give it more power than that and it has to be swifter." She tried again and it wasn't any better.

"Fine, I'll demonstrate." I served a quick ball, explaining the positioning of my arms and the force needed to get the ball over to the other side of the net. She jerked her head up and down, trying to understand, but still not getting it right in her next try.

"Here," I reached over and positioned her shoulders and arm correctly, straightening her elbow, "You need to have good posture when you swing."

It was better than when we first started, but still not very good and not controlled enough to succeed in tennis. It was good enough for now, I supposed.

I taught her the correct motion to use when going for a ball, showing her the quick, rapid steps taken.

She practiced this routine of steps and swinging until dark and through the spattering of rain. She did another swing.

"You still need to be faster. And bring your shoulder forward." Kotoko stopped and stared at me, tired.

"Can't we stop? It's been two hours." She then grinned hard at me.

 _Well, it is late…_ I thought.

"Fine. We'll pick up here again tomorrow."

"Yay! See you tomorrow!" She rushed off to get changed as though I might change my mind.

"Tomorrow at seven o'clock! You better not be late!" I called after her.

"Okay!"

I smiled to myself at her enthusiasm, and then I also dressed and went home.


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter Twenty-Eight**

Kotoko missed the ball. Today, we'd progressed onto actually using physical balls, but she had yet to hit more than three.

"Now your arm is too stiff." I told her. She'd made quite the improvement when it came to how loose her arms were, but now they were stiff as boards. I had to hand it to her, though. For the last three days, she'd been working hard. Every morning and every evening. And she hadn't been late once (or yet, at least).

With bruises riddled up her legs and spattered on her arms, I had to give her credit for her durability. I'd seen her determined many times, but now I was sure she was the most unrelenting person I knew. She may even have been worse than my mother, and until now, I'd never thought anyone would surpass her.

I flung another ball Kotoko's way. With a robotically stiff arm, she tapped it with the frame of her racket, it popping up and then rolling away from her. I guess I could consider it a hit.

"You're still too stiff. Relax."

"Yes." She nodded and got into position to try for another ball… which she missed. I decided to try something different.

"Just… pretend your arm is like the wind. Powerful but flexible." I said, figuring this technique might work for someone like her who needed visuals.

She whipped her racket at another ball, her arm conforming back to being loose. There was no helping her.

I rubbed my forehead and reached over to grab her wrist. I lengthened out her arm. With my other hand, I brought her shoulder forward. I then used her arm to show her to correct way to swing.

"Like this. It's really simple, you're just thinking too hard. And be quicker. Your steps are too slow."

She turned to me with an apologetic face, cheeks burned red with tonight's chill, "I'm sorry."

"Just keep practicing." I ordered and tossed her another. She missed.

"You have to keep your eye on the ball. Stop looking away." I threw another ball into the air. She hit it this time, but it was too low and hit the net instead of going over it.

"When you hit it, angle your racket up more. You're hitting it straight-on, so it won't go over the net."

"I know. I can do it."

The next ball she hit flew up high and bounced back to the ground a meter from her. I scrutinized her.

 _Really?_

Kotoko giggled in a childishly embarrassed sort of way. I found myself admiring it for one short second.

The lights went out. The court was pitch black.

"Oh no!" Kotoko squealed. I sighed at myself.

"I forgot to tell the custodians we'd be out here again tonight." I said. Even in the dark, I knew she was smiling.

"So, we're done for the night?"

"Not quite yet. We'll just have to practice outside of the court." Kotoko groaned but followed my lead as we made for a street light.

"How much longer? I still have to study." She said.

"Stand over there," I directed her, "Hit it correctly once and we'll be done." I tossed a ball into the air. She swung with all her might, but the little spec of yellow disappeared into a shrub.

Again, and again, and again, she missed. I was beginning to think this practice wouldn't end.

"Okay, how about if you can hit it just once, you can leave?" I said. If she couldn't hit it even once, how was I expecting her to hit it correctly? We would be here all night.

"I'm trying." She said and shivered, rubbing her hands together. I threw another. Her racket clipped it, so I called it a night.

"We're done. See you tomorrow." I headed off for the locker rooms.

"See you tomorrow!" She skipped into the girls' locker room, a huge grin spread across her intensely happy face.

I paused, taken with it. Something spurred in me that I couldn't quite explain. It washed away with the cool wind that ripped through me, leaving me confuzzled. I concluded that I must've simply been tired.


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter Twenty-Nine**

"Quicker!" I shouted as I tossed a ball at her from in front of the net. This was as far as she'd gotten in a week. Her posture was _okay_ , as were her returns, but it was her serving that needed some more fixing.

Kotoko hit it over the net, though it went out of bounds. Good enough.

"You're going to be practicing serving for the rest of the night." I wheeled the basket-full of tennis balls over to her side and propped myself up on the chain link to watch and critique.

"You think I'm good enough at hitting back?" She asked. I shrugged.

"It'll do," I said. She shone her brilliant smile at me, "Not too stiff and not too loose." I told her as she picked a ball and positioned to serve. She looked good for having started learning everything from scratch a week ago.

Kotoko tossed it in the air, swung the racket, and the ball fell straight to the ground.

"You're swinging too quickly. Wait for it to get low enough before you swing." Kotoko nodded and tried again and thrice more, each except for the last being a miss.

"Your timing is still way off. Count to two each time after you throw, then swing."

She held the ball out in front of her, took a breath, and threw it up.

"One," she counted and positioned her racket, "Two." She swung and caught the ball. It flew across the net and way out of bounds.

"You're hitting it too high. Tilt your racket down a little more when you hit." I instructed.

"Right." Now, she served a ball that hit the net. And again and again.

"Too low. You're thinking too hard." I sighed.

"I'm sorry," Kotoko said, her brows knitting together, "I'm no good at this."

"Let's just keep practicing. Maybe a miracle will happen." I said. Kotoko bit her lip and repositioned to serve.

"One," she threw the ball, "Two," She hit it over the net and it went out of bounds.

"Where are you aiming? Again."

Kotoko got her feet into the right place and rolled her shoulders and held the ball out.

"One," She tossed it into the air, " _Two_!" The ball soared over the net and bounced twice on the pavement before going out of bounds. She'd finally done it.

At first she simply stared at the ball across the court and then she squealed with accomplishment.

" _I did it!_ " She shouted into the sky and danced around, completely over the moon about doing something anyone could learn in five minutes.

Kotoko threw her arms out and spun in a circle, stopping dizzily. I watched her, admiring her drive and absolute happiness.  
A broad grin painted rose onto the cheeks already bitten by the cold as she caught her balance. I couldn't tear my eyes away from her.

 _God, I love her_.

I froze.

 _What?_ I asked myself, though the little voice in my head had gone silent. I was rendered speechless. I gaped at her, outraged and shocked. I knew it for a fact, then. Something in my head clicked, the feeling you get when you remember something important.

 _No_. I argued at myself, _NO_. But there was no question about it, I supposed. Arguing wouldn't change it.

I loved her… Kotoko.

I snapped out of it when I realized she'd stopped celebrating and was peering at me apprehensively.

"Irie-kun…?" She said and I broke my limbs out of their frozen shock, grabbing a ball from the basket.

"It's great that you have so many things to be excited about," I said and served it perfectly, "Sometimes I envy you for that."

Kotoko was quick to smile at me again, "Maybe you should try to find something that makes you happier, then. Like a new hobby!" She offered, but I had nothing left to say.

"Come on… Go again. You need to learn this by the end of the night." I said calmly.

"Okay." She served many more balls, not as many being a flop. But actually, I wasn't paying attention to the serves. I was paying attention to her. Her movements, her smile, the encouraging comments she made to herself…

In an instant, I could understand every little confused emotion I felt toward her and how I felt when she left. All of this left me suddenly bursting at the seams with awareness. I was truly captivated by her.

Kotoko made a correct serve and looked back to me for approval, "Looks good. I think we can be done for tonight. See you at the match tomorrow." I said and Kotoko flashed me one last grin as she hopped off to get changed.

I felt warm, the image sending a tingling through me. I hated it. I didn't want this. After this long hard battle with her over this very issue, and I was losing. For once in my life, I didn't know what to do.

With that, I went home to my mother who couldn't find it in her to spare me of some suspicious looks. There also was that problem. I'd battled my mother on this issue as well. To admit defeat would be like allowing her to control me my entire life. That was the last thing I wanted after I felt I'd finally began taking hold of my life and steering it in a direction I wanted.

This… whatever it was… it threw a knot into things.

I showered and went to bed, but I wasn't tired. I was wide awake with intrusive thoughts. I loved Kotoko.

The thought annoyed me, but it did ring true. Again, my life was out of my own hands. Because now I couldn't get her out of my head, not for a second. For a single moment, I'd allowed my mind to take the backseat and I'd learned what I really felt about her. No more logical explanations or lies to myself, but the truth. What else was there I hadn't told myself about, I wondered.

 **A/N: would've posted sooner, but got sick. You may have a different idea of when you think he realized his feelings, but this is just mine. Hope you enjoyed. :)**


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter Thirty**

Sudo asserted himself on one side of the court as soon as Kotoko arrived. He was ready.

"Matsumoto!" He called with the cry of a demon, and she swept over to his side, all set for the match to begin.

"Listen," I said to Kotoko as we trooped on over to the other side of the court, "Don't let an entire week of your effort go to waste. Just keep your eyes open and be fast." She appeared to be anticipating bad things to come.

"Right, okay." She said.

"You're not alone out there. I'm going to be there, so don't be scared." I said. Kotoko breathed a sigh of relief, giving me a thankful look. I turned away to keep these trying, intrusive thoughts at bay. Anytime I tried to be nice, it backfired on me because I didn't want to feel this way. But being nice seemed to provoke my mind into thinking this way.

All set up on the court, everyone stopped their practicing to watch the match.

"I hope you're ready for this!" Sudo said and made the first serve. It was automatically aimed at Kotoko. Only now, she didn't cower and run. She lunged for it. Her racket hit the ball right on, but it flew up into the air sloppily.

 _We've gone over this…_ I thought. But she was Kotoko, after all. She wasn't about to do everything perfect.

Sudo took the lead and another serve. I hit it back and Yuuko returned it to Kotoko who hit it again, although it didn't make it over the net. Kotoko scrunched her face up in frustration. We prepared for another serve from the other side of the court.

Sudo served it toward her again, and again she wasn't able to return it properly. He made the point, each time he received the ball, to ignore me in the entirety of the word. He was severely agitated with Kotoko to the point that the rivalry wasn't with me anymore, but with her.

He spoke to Yuuko in grumbles across the court.

" _She's hitting every ball, that beginner!_ " He said crazily.

"But she can't hit it back. We'll win for sure." Yuuko countered.

" _I don't care! This is a matter of my pride!_ " Sudo said. He got in closer to Yuuko and said something else I couldn't make out.

Yuuko began to ignore me the same way Sudo was. I was practically nonexistent on the court, their predatory eyes trained on Kotoko for ensurance of their win.

Sudo became angrier by the minute that Kotoko could hit his serves, and even angrier when I would intervene if she couldn't get it.

And the angrier he was, the more out of control his serves were. While strong, his aim was off. And then I saw it… it was the perfect serve for her. It was lower than the others and had barely made it over the net. But she seemed unsure of it since it was a little farther away.

"Get it, Kotoko!" I shouted at her.

She leapt for it, her racket hitting the ball dead-center. It soared the distance, past Yuuko as she tried for it, and bounced on the court just before going out of bounds. A perfect return.

But maybe not so perfect.

Kotoko's foot landed on the ground awkwardly. Her ankle twisted to the side. She collapsed under the pain of it.

"Ow!" She cried and held her ankle. I rushed to her aid and took a look at it. The ankle in question had already started to swell.

"That's a stupid way to sprain your ankle." I told her, feeling the ankle for myself. She definitely wouldn't be playing tennis for a little while.

" _Ouch_ , that hurts!" She complained.

"You can't play anymore," I said to Kotoko and laid my racket down, "Sudo, we forfeit."

"You forfeit?" He said, recovering from the shock that Kotoko had returned one of his serves. His face brightened significantly.

I scooped Kotoko up off the ground. She was taken by surprise. She looped her arm around my neck, appearing self-conscious. I walked her to the girls' locker rooms, Sudo cheering up a storm behind us.

"I'm sorry. We lost again because of me." She said in disappointment.

"I wasn't expecting us to win." I said without thinking, hoping I hadn't let anything slip that I shouldn't have… that the only reason we'd been practicing was because I wanted to spend time with her.

She smiled up at me. I was left annoyed by the effect it had. I'd wished it away all last night and all day today, but with a twist in my gut, I knew this feeling wouldn't be going anywhere. Just like her since the day I met her.

I dropped Kotoko off at the door of the locker room.

"I'll walk you home. You don't live far from here, right?" I said. She nodded.

"Right. Thank you, Irie-kun." She dazzled me again. My heart jumped. How was she doing that?

I dressed quickly and met her outside the locker rooms. She took immediate claim to my arm, limping so hard that one would've thought she'd broken her leg. I took her bag for her and strung it over my other shoulder.

"My house is three blocks from here. We're finally moving into it today." She said. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion of this statement.

"What do you mean you're finally moving into it?" She'd been gone for two weeks. If she wasn't living in her new house, then where could she possibly have been living?

"My father and I have been living in a little apartment until the house was ready to be moved into." She said. So, her father had wanted her away from me so badly that they moved out when the house wasn't ready… I'd had no idea he was so serious about it.

I said nothing.

After a block of her extreme limping, she started up conversation again.

"We'll be there soon. We just have to walk another block and then turn and turn again and we're there." She drew it into the air with her finger.

"We should've taken a taxi." I said. With her ankle sprained and her slowing us down so heavily, it would take an hour to get there.

"It's a waste of money." She took a second and then made a smug expression.

"What is it?"

"Back there… you said my name, right? Not my family name, my first name." I closed my eyes in regret. I'd been hoping so greatly she hadn't picked up on it.

"I don't know." I said passively with the idea she might forget about it.

"It's the first time you've done that."

"Like I said, I don't remember. I was concentrated on the game." Kotoko giggled at the ground. She was such a simple person. Just my saying her first name had put her into an elated state.

After months of referring to her as her first name in only my head, I guessed I'd forgotten that I didn't call her by that name. My mistake.

She clung to me through the rest of the walk. After the second turn, she pointed out a house to the right.

"That's the one." She made for it as quickly as her gimp would allow, up the porch stairs and to the door. She rang the doorbell a few times.

I handed her back her bag, "Tell your father I said hello." I said, assuming she could make it into her house on her own.

"Wait!" She grabbed my arm again, "You could come in for a cup of tea! It looks like my father's home and he'd probably like to see you." She insisted as she pulled me back.

I questioned myself over my recently-revealed feelings for the umpteenth time today. _This_ one? This clingy, dumb, clumsy, girl who was too loud for her own good?

 _Yep_.

I sighed.

" _Alright, I've got it_. Now let go of my arm and stop tugging." I said in a sort of snap.

Kotoko grinned at me as we waited for her father to come to the door. I heard footsteps and the door swung open.

"Dad…" She said, but stopped short. A much older man stood in the doorway. Certainly not her father.

"Is this your grandfather?" I asked her. She shook her head.

"I don't know him." Great. We were at the wrong house, "Who are you?" She said to him.

"You are so rude. I should be asking you who _you_ are." He waggled his finger at us.

"I live in this house." Kotoko said. The man was piqued.

"This is my house. Kids today… some kind of prank…" He grumbled as he shut the door on us.

"No way. I'm so sure this is the house." She limped down the stairs and to the front of the house, looking for something.

"What are you doing now?"

"When my father brought me here, there was a flower pot… aha, there it is!" She brought me to a large, cracked pot with a withered shrub in it.

"So what does this mean?" I said.

"I don't know. But I need to call my father and see what's going on." She pulled out her phone. I also dug mine out from my bag to call a taxi. I didn't have the time to be walking her all around Tokyo on my arm.

"He won't answer." She said. Lines formed on her forehead.

"We're just going to have to go back to my house. A taxi will be here soon." Kotoko sat on the curb.

The taxi came ten minutes later. The drive was full of her moping, and by the time we'd made it to my house, night had set in. We climbed out from the taxi.

"Where did he go?" She said worriedly.

Yuuki came running out of the door as the taxi pulled away from the house.

"My room! My room is… it's…" He found Kotoko and pointed at her, "It's _her_ fault!" He whined.

Excitement and relief coursed through me.

My mother scurried out the front door, her eyes wide with knowing. She was alive for the first time in a couple of weeks. It was good to have to back to being herself, even if being herself meant scheming.

"Welcome home, Naoki, Kotoko-chan. I thought you two would be together."

"We went to my new house, but someone else lives there. I can't reach my father either." Kotoko explained.

"Your father went to the real estate agency." I could see my mother doing her best to try and look sorry, but I could see her true intents. If I didn't know any better, it was likely she had something to do with this.

"Oh no. What happened?"

"There was a mix-up with the lease. Turns out, another man signed it before your father." My mother said. She was guilty, and I was sure of it.

"Does that mean my father and I are homeless again?"

"Oh don't you worry," And there it was, "You can come live with us again!" My mother grinned something vicious, like a child getting its way.

"But…" Kotoko said and looked to me as if waiting for me to object. But, to be honest, I had no refusal. The house was boring without her.

"We _are_ going to be a family eventually after all." My mother said. Part of me wondered if she could read my mind now, if she somehow knew of my revelation.

"Stop talking nonsense." I said.

"Nonsense, you say?" She crossed her arms and leaned in mischievously, "I know you two kissed."

I stared at her. It was one amazing thing after the next today. Absolutely amazing. All I wanted to know was who my mother had heard this from, and only one person came to mind.

I glared down at Kotoko. She could never keep quiet about anything. She picked up on this and shook her head at the assumption.

"It wasn't me! I didn't tell her!" She proclaimed her innocence. If not Kotoko, then who? She had to have something to do with it, because I hadn't told a soul.

"That's not true. It has to be a lie, right?" Yuuki said in an outrage. I had no argument to offer, simply done with today.

"I would have never guessed," My mother said, "It's not nice to trick your mother, you know." She gushed.

"But, how did you find out?" Kotoko said.

"That's for me and my information-givers to know alone." She laughed an evil laugh.

Yuuki ran inside and I left those two on the front step to secretly plot against me. In my bedroom, I found Yuuki's bed squished into the corner again.

I realized I didn't have a problem with it, other than the idea of my mother knowing things she shouldn't have. Things were back to normal in this house.


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter Thirty-One**

I woke in a state of heightened awareness, coming off a dream. I didn't dream much, but last night had been an exception. And I'd dreamed of Kotoko. It wasn't anything in particular… just her. There was her liveliness, the specific way she walked with a sort of bounce, and the smile that stuck with me even after the dream ended. I might've also dreamed a conversation with her, but I couldn't remember what about.

I rubbed my eyes into focus. It was quite early in the morning, much earlier than I usually woke. I figured I'd get a jump on the day, maybe get out of the house early and avoid my mother. She'd been especially bad since Kotoko moved back in. She'd taken the word "overbearing" to a whole new level, constantly making comments about me and Kotoko, looking at me like she knew all my secrets, and spying on me. It was to the point I almost wanted to move out.

I got dressed, made myself some toast, and headed out for Tonan University before anyone was even up. Tonan's library opened at six o'clock every morning, so I could read there until classes started.

I wandered into the abandoned library. The only person there was the book keeper, as expected since it was only a little past six. I roamed the shelves until I found a suitable book and seated myself in the back corner of the library. I started to read.

The only problem was that my mind couldn't focus. Well, it could, but not nearly as well as it used to. I'd thought that once I knew what had been bugging me, I wouldn't be so burdened by it and would be able to think without disruptions. But now I knew and still couldn't think.

Giving in to my mind, I snapped the book shut. If this was all my thoughts could linger on, then so be it. I was done denying myself the privilege to think about whatever I wanted.

Once I let the thoughts flow, they came through as if a dam had broken. I found myself thinking it again… that magical phrase that I'd somehow familiarized myself with.

 _I'm in love with Kotoko_.

The corners of my mouth lifted into a small smile. Now that I thought about it, she truly did _everything_ she set her mind to. No matter what it was, no matter how impossible. She was gifted in ways many people weren't. She had faith in the impossible and made it happen. Kotoko was astounding. Amazing.

So, maybe there was one thing Kinnosuke and I had in common. Just one. And I understood it. I could understand why he'd loved her for so long, could see it with my own eyes.

But I didn't know what to do with this information. I couldn't reveal it. My mother would have a fit of telling me she always knew what was best for me and then she'd try to control every other aspect of my life. I couldn't risk losing that control once I finally felt I had it.

For over an hour I sat there with a book held in front of my face and trying to read as more students strolled into the library.

Feeling that it was time to get going, I put the book away and walked across the university to my department.

I was twenty minutes early, but others had also begun to show up. Among them was Yuuko.

She sauntered over to me and we walked into the classroom.

"You're a little early today," She said, slinking into the seat beside mine, "What's that about?"

"No reason." I lied.

She was silent for a minute, looking me over, "You live with Kotoko Aihara again, right?"

"Yes." I said. What did Kotoko have to do with anything?

"Okay, well maybe you can answer this, because I'm curious." She waited for a nod of approval.

"What?"

"There's a rumor she's been dating Sudo. Is it true?"

Blasted rumors again…

"No, it isn't." I said, refusing it. She hadn't been leaving the house to go out on dates or getting calls or anything of the sort. It didn't seem true, and she and Sudo would have been a strange couple.

Until the professor came, Yuuko went on about tennis and talked about the essay we were writing.

The professor came in five minutes late and started his lecture right away. The entire class was silent, diligently taking notes and listening to him. The hour was gone surprisingly fast. Yuuko and I made for our second class of the day.

"I have something else I'd like to ask you," She said as we made out into the air that was chilling for winter, though still not very cold, "I have two tickets to a movie this Sunday. Would you like to go with me?" My mind formed an immediate rejection to this proposed date.

I wasn't able to get the words out before I spotted Sudo and then Kotoko. On a bench, they sat rather closely together. I narrowed my eyes at them. She laughed at something and they stood, having not seen Yuuko or me.

Kotoko stumbled and Sudo caught her. It looked very suspicious. Maybe I had been wrong. The idea swept through me with a bite. Suddenly agitated, I wanted to interrupt them. Yuuko did that for me.

"So the rumors _were_ true?" She said as we passed by. Kotoko turned a confused eye to her.

"What rumors?" She asked. Sudo came to attention.

"The rumors that you and Sudo are seeing each other."

"No! Of course not." Kotoko exclaimed. I gritted my teeth, not believing it. Her eyes roamed over and landed on me, as if waiting for me to respond.

"Really? It created a sort of sensation in the tennis club. Everyone thinks you're giving up on Irie-kun for Sudo." Yuuko said. Sudo shook his head.

"Really, Irie-kun, there's nothing going on here." Kotoko said. I couldn't take her word for it. They'd looked too close to not be dating or at least almost dating.

"I'm not particularly concerned," I said, "And Yuuko, I'm free on Sunday. I can go to the movies with you."

"Great!" Yuuko said. Sudo and Kotoko stared after us.

I was up in fumes for the rest of the day.

 **A/N: When originally asked, I said no, but have since changed my mind. Takendo Nakagawa will be appearing in this story. I hadn't thought about it, but now I think it would be fun and I'm looking forward to it. Hope you enjoy. :D**


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter Thirty-Two**

Today was supposed to be the last warm day of the season. After that, winter would take hold. So today was the perfect day for a date. Only I wished I hadn't agreed to it, because I didn't think of Yuuko in that way. She was nothing more than a friend.

Still, I shoved off for the meeting spot Yuuko and I had agreed on. It was a short walk from my house, about fifteen minutes, and I used that time to try to get into the frame of mind for being on a date. But as I could tell so far, it wasn't going to happen.

I didn't want to date Yuuko. We were too alike. In that, there were never any surprises when it came to the two of us doing anything together. Whether it was practicing tennis or talking about our studies, everything always turned out as expected. It was boring. Boring was one thing I couldn't tolerate anymore. And then there was Kotoko…

I made it to the spot without a hitch in the plan. Yuuko stood waiting by a street light and cracked a smile when she saw me.

"Irie-kun!" She called over to me and strutted to my side.

"Have you been waiting long?" I asked her.

"No, I just got here a few minutes ago."

I searched for something else to say, coming up with, "That dress looks nice on you."

"Really? Thank you." Yuuko said.

"We should get going now." I said. Yuuko nodded.

On the way to the movie theater, she talked about the movie we were seeing. It was some kind of romance. I couldn't fully listen to the explanation as I was paying much more attention to behind us.

A girl in a light pink dress, big sunglasses, and a head scarf scuttled along next to a chubby man hiding his face behind an opened map. Kotoko and Sudo.

I should have known those two weren't dating. And with the way they were following us, it appeared Sudo was way more interested in Yuuko. Kotoko saw me turn around and dodged behind the map. I chuckled at how obvious she was.

"What's so funny?" Yuuko asked me. I wiped the grin off my face.

"Nothing."

All the way there, the two of them hid themselves behind trees, used disguised voices, and never once put down the map. I figured I might have a bit of fun with this.

At the movie theater, Yuuko and I showed our tickets and went to have a seat. I watched Kotoko and Sudo bumble in.

"Can we have seats right behind those two?" Kotoko asked. Yuuko and I disappeared into the theater.

A minute or two later, a noisy couple squeezed into the seats behind us.

"Hey, that's my foot!" Someone complained.

"Sorry, sorry." Kotoko said. Sudo munched on popcorn and slurped a drink.

That was all that was heard of them in the first twenty minutes of the movie. This was where I started to mess with them.

I reached out to lay my hand over Yuuko's and pieces of popcorn came flying at my head, interrupting the movement.

" _Oh no, I'm spilling my pop corn_."

" _Watch out, dear_."

I fought back a laugh so hard in the middle of the theater. What did those two think they were doing? More importantly, did they really think I didn't know who they were? Kotoko had to have cooked up this scheme.

For the next half an hour, they whispered to each other unsparingly, getting shooshed many times and even causing Yuuko to tell them to quiet down.

They settled down and Yuuko went to lay her head on my shoulder. I wondered what those clowns would do now. A pamphlet stuck in between her head and my shoulder. Yuuko shot back to her seat and snuck another irritated look at Kotoko and Sudo. He obscured his face behind his own pamphlet and Kotoko ducked to reach for hers.

" _Oops, I dropped my booklet_."

The rest of the movie, they were shameless, stifling laughs and throwing popcorn if Yuuko made a move. It was clear to see that Yuuko was disturbed at the least, but I was considerably more entertained by them than the movie.

I was thankful when it ended. Thinking I'd let the date go on farther, I said, "Would you like to go get something to eat? There's a cafe up the street."

"That would be great."

Sudo and Kotoko waited for us again and then followed us out the theater, down the street, and into the cafe.

They scurried into seats a few yards from us and concealed themselves behind the menus. It was all so silly.

"That couple behind us at the movie was so rude, weren't they?" Yuuko said as she picked up her menu.

"Yes, they were," I decided to take a hit at Kotoko, "Dumb, too." Yuuko was quiet for a moment, then she put down the menu.

"You know, I've liked you since junior high. I thought for sure you would apply to other colleges, but when I heard you were using the escalator, I was so happy. I thought it was fate for us to go to the same college." She told me, but I only half-heard. Those few yards away, Kotoko was looking hopeless. I cracked up very shortly.

"Really?" I said.

"So, Irie-kun… what type of girls do you like?" I found the opportunity to play with Kotoko again as her and Sudo eavesdropped.

"Well, let me see… I like beautiful girls with a nice body, and she has to be smart," I almost finished, "Oh, and she has to be good at cooking." I looked over inconspicuously to find Kotoko with her face scrunched up in a frown, defeated. But Yuuko was the opposite of that.

"I see…" She said with a smirk, "Then it sounds like we'd be the perfect couple."

"It does." I said.

Sudo and Kotoko went a little nuts. He whispered something to her and took off, leaving Kotoko alone at the table and looking dejected. Maybe I'd gone a little too far with messing with her. Sudo returned.

Yuuko and I ordered coffees and spent the rest of the time talking about the movie and a report she recently thought she could have done better on despite having been awarded a 97% mark on it.

We finished up and I payed. Kotoko and Sudo followed us again, and on the way out the door of the cafe, Yuuko said, "This has been nice. Walk me back?"

"Of course." I said. On the way out, Kotoko was sluggish. I felt sort of bad.

A block into the route back, I noticed Kotoko and Sudo even farther away. Kotoko looked pretty upset. She turned to go the opposite direction as me and Yuuko, running into a rather brutish man and spilling her drink on him.

"That was a very expensive shirt!" I heard him shout. Several people stopped and turned to stare at him and Kotoko.

"I'm sorry…" she whimpered.

Yuuko also turned to watch, "Is that Aihara and Sudo?" She said.

"We'll pay for the dry cleaning." Sudo said and reached into his back pocket. He held out some money.

"You think _that_ is enough?" The man stepped up close to Kotoko. Too close, "You're cute, you know… we could go back to my office and discuss some stuff." He grabbed her wrist and Kotoko looked terrified. My temper flared.

Adrenaline sent me over to them to help and get that filthy man away from her. Yuuko followed me.

"Let's go." He said. Kotoko tried to pry his hand off of her.

"No! Let go of me!"

"You heard her… let go," I said to the man, "With a shirt that cheap, there's no need to discuss anything."

He turned his beady eyes on me and threw Kotoko's arm away. She rubbed her wrist. I was made angrier by the fact that he was so much bigger and stronger that he might've hurt her.

"What did you say?" He growled at me. In a snap, he threw a punch that was so slow that I dodged it without a problem. He tried again and this time I caught a whiff of alcohol.

The man stumbled and sent himself to the ground. He dragged himself up sloppily. Looking around for any means of defense, I found a woman with a tennis racket. I reached over and plucked it from her hands and handed it to Sudo.

" _Now you can show Yuuko how great you are_." I said in a low voice.

The man regrouped himself and I took Kotoko's hand in mine. We split from the scene. Behind us, Sudo charged at the brute.

Kotoko and I sped down the walkway toward the river. We turned onto the bridge and continued to the other side where we stopped at the guard rail.

"I think we're far enough." I said through jagged breaths.

She leaned against the rail and peered over to me.

"Did you know we were following you?" She asked me and looked shamefaced.

"You two are so obvious, I would have to have been blind to not notice." I said.

"Sudo-san is in love with Matsumoto, you know." I positioned myself on the rail next to her.

"I know now. Until today, I really thought you and Sudo were in a relationship," I said, regretting that I'd ever thought it and that I'd gone on a date with Yuuko because of it, "But I realized when I found you two tailing us. It was so funny to watch."

Lines formed on Kotoko's forehead and she pressed her lips together.

"I'm sorry… I just couldn't help it when I found out you two were going on a date," She held her gaze on her feet, "But if you're in love with Matsumoto-san, I've just ruined your date."

The only reason I'd had any fun on the date was because of her tagging along… probably because I would rather have gone on a date with Kotoko. And it looked like now was the only time I could bring her somewhere without it being obvious.

"Do you want to go somewhere with me?"

"What?" Kotoko's eyes rounded into saucers as though she couldn't believe what she was hearing. She gaped at me without an answer.

"Fine. I'm going home then." I started to leave.

"Wait! I do!" She swept up to me and smiled so widely one would've thought she'd just won the lottery.

My heart leapt into my throat. I felt the urge to kiss her, but shoved it away. I couldn't. Not with the chance of my mother finding out and planning a wedding.

"Where are we going?" She said.

"Just follow me." I said. With the place being so close, I thought it was perfect. Farther down the way, there was a tourist spot with a nice view of the river. She was so simple, I was sure she'd love it.

For a few blocks, she walked silently and with a grin tugging at her lips the entire time.

At the turn, she took off with a, "Wow!" She ran around the bend like she was seeing the river for the first time in her life.

"It's so beautiful!" I left her to get food from a stand and let her get acquainted with the view. A few minutes later, I returned to the bend with a bag of food. I found her sitting on a bench and sat. I held the bag out to her.

"Your dinner." I said. She took a hamburger out of the bag and unwrapped it carefully with a look of awe.

 _So simple_.

"This is the best." She said after one bite. Licking her lips, she went for another.

"Everything tastes good when you're hungry." I said.

She giggled, "Thanks for the food."

Kotoko went to the rail to finish it off and I followed her. The sun went orange as it began to set for the night.

"My life never used to be very hard," I started, "But every day since you gave me that love letter, there's been one issue after the next," She peered at me like she wasn't surprised to be hearing this, "I think you're a trial that was given to me."

"A trial?"

"And because I wasn't used to it, I ran away from it…"

"Don't treat me like a disease." She pouted.

I continued, "But I've realized my life is more interesting when there's a challenge. Thanks for that."

She seemed confused, "What?"

"It's okay if you don't understand."

"I _do_ understand. I'm not that stupid," She huffed, "You were trying to run away from me before, but now…" I almost felt caught. I hoped she couldn't figure it out. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything, "You're not running away anymore. Right?"

"What I meant was I don't mind having you around." I said.

"You mean you don't hate me?" She asked and I could hear how genuine a question it was. I'd had no idea she really thought I hated her.

"No, I don't hate you." She gazed at me happily, and then she started to cry.

I reached into my pocket and handed her my handkerchief.

"Thanks." She said and wiped her eyes with it. Even with her being such a mess, I couldn't stop staring at her. How could a person be so blind, to not see that I didn't hate her until I said it? Any other girl would have put the pieces together by now. But not this one.

…

We got home after dark. My mother was at the door waiting, the price I would pay for being a little late _and_ coming home with Kotoko.

"Where were you guys?" She assessed Kotoko's dress.

"Out." I said, already on the stairs to get away from her.

"On a date with my future daughter-in-law? You should have told me so I could take pictures!" My mother whined. I grinded my teeth.

"And why would I want you to take pictures?"

"So there's something to show at the wedding, of course. I only have a few pictures of you two together." I bit back my tongue and continued up the stairs. My mother was so overbearing. I couldn't take her. It was to the point I almost didn't want to come home anymore… and now she had something else to badger me about, because surely Kotoko would tell my mother it was a date. And I didn't want to be here when that happened. I had to get out.

I put away my bag in my bedroom and went back downstairs to find my mother and father in the sitting room, speaking in whispers.

"I want to talk." I said to them.

"Yes, Naoki?" My father said. I sat opposite them.

"How old were you when you moved out?" I asked him. He scratched his head.

"I was about nineteen. Why?"

"Because I think it's time I did," My mother scowled at me, "I want to move out and live alone, at least for a while."

"No. I don't agree with it," My mother crossed her arms, "Kotoko just came back! Now you want to leave?"

"Come on, honey. Young men his age need to experience this kind of thing. It might not be a bad idea for him to live on his own. I say give it a try."

"Thank you." I stood. My mother rampaged on and on with an argument, but it was settled. I was determined to get away from my mother. Kotoko may have only just come back a couple of weeks ago, but I needed to go, if not only to be away from my mother, but to also sort out how I felt about her and maybe figure out what I was doing with my life.


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter Thirty-Three**

Bags packed and my new apartment waiting, my mother followed me to the door. She still wasn't accepting of the move, but I needed the time away.

Kotoko watched dejectedly from the stairway as I slipped my feet into my shoes. She hadn't said much about it, although she was clearly distraught. Her eyes fell to the ground in front of her.

"Naoki, please take care of yourself, okay?" My mother said, "Make sure to eat your vegetables and…"

"I know." Yuuki came to the door to say goodbye. I couldn't say he had been very happy either.

"Good luck." He said. I nodded.

"Thanks." I snuck a glance at Kotoko who didn't appear to be coming over or wanting to say anything. She caught the glance and averted her line of sight again.

"Goodbye."

On the walk to my new apartment, I kept checking behind me to make sure I wasn't being followed. I hadn't told my mother where I was going to be living because if I did, it would almost be as though I didn't live alone. She would drop by to cook me dinner, check up on me, and make sure my fridge had food in it. Same went for where I would be working.

The apartment building was an hour walk from the house. I finally got there just past noon and dug the key out of my pocket.

Turning the lock, I felt the change. The door swung open to reveal the small stack of boxes to be unpacked. Everything had been moved here yesterday, and then I'd gone out and bought other things I didn't have, like food, towels, a bed, and the like. And then today, I'd finished packing up back at the house.

I closed the door behind me and suddenly it was final. The still air reminded me of how alone and boring the place would be.

I got to unpacking the boxes. It was mostly clothes and books, and it wasn't hard to get them put away with how small this place was. The living space was the size of a slightly larger bedroom. Off of that branched a bathroom and tiny kitchen.

I came to unpacking a smaller box. This one had awards in it… and a few other things. The dirty and broken charm Kotoko had made for me, that strange head massager she'd bought me, and two pictures: the one taken when we'd fallen asleep studying and the one taken on graduation day.

I smiled at the objects. Every last of these things had some sort of crazy memory attached to it.

I placed them in the top drawer of my desk carefully, and then the graduation picture out on the desktop. I liked the look of it there.

The rest of the boxes were unpacked successfully and my phone rang.

"Hello." I got it after the first ring. I'd been expecting a call.

"Is this Naoki Irie?" A man asked. I recognised his voice. The manager of a cafe a few blocks down who I'd recently had an interview with.

"Yes, it is."

"Hi, it's Oishi Tadayoshi from Teppan. We'd like to offer you the position you applied for. Do you think you could come in for paperwork in a bit?"

"Great. Yes, I can come in." I said, so relieved to have gotten this job.

"How about one-thirty?" He asked.

"That's a good time. I'll see you then."

"See you."

I picked up around me, took the boxes out to the dumpster, and walked the few blocks to Teppan.

Once there, I filled out all of my information in the paperwork and was handed an apron to come in the next day and start.

I went home. Night rolled in for the stillest sleep I'd had in ages.

 **A/N: I know, this chapter is short… maybe my shortest one. I don't like posting these brief, barely-one-page chapters, but nothing too big was happening here. The next one will be longer, I promise. :D**


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter Thirty-Four**

"Good day." I said after a customer as they exited Teppan. I cleared their table and wiped it clean, though there wasn't much to get. I picked up their tip and moved on to the next customer.

In the two weeks I'd been here, I'd definitely grown into the job and was quite good at it since I had such a good memory. With that, I also received generous tips from those I served. I was well-suited for Teppan.

What was even better was that there was nothing here to distract me… or rather, no _one_. I'd only told one person where I was working and living, and that was Sudo. I thought it best to tell one person just in case anything ever happened. Until then, I had complete privacy.

A burst of cold air rushed through the cafe as the door opened again. Ready to serve this person, I peered over my shoulder to see where they were sitting.

It was Yuuko. And she didn't sit anywhere. Instead, she went for the counter.

"I'm here for Oishi Tadayoshi." She said. Curiously, I went toward her.

"Yuuko?" I said. She turned a surprised eye on me.

"Irie-kun," She said, "You work here?"

"Yes, I do."

"That makes this even better than I thought. I applied here a couple of days ago and I'm coming in for the interview now." Under her smile was hidden something secretive. Maybe Sudo had told her where I worked? This just didn't seem like a coincidence.

Tadayoshi called Yuuko to the back with him. I got to more customers in the meantime.

My shift was coming near its close when three people wandered in. The two women were wearing scarves and sunglasses. The third one was quite short and wearing a mask that covered half of his face.

With a tactic I'd seen before, they hid their faces behind menus and acted as though I wouldn't know who they were. But I wasn't stupid. All I wanted to know was how they had found out where I worked.

"You can stop hiding your faces now," I said to them and Kotoko lowered the menu with guilt painted all over her face.

"How did you know it was us?" My mother asked. I was baffled by how she'd thought this ridiculous technique would work. I wasn't blind… or deaf, even.

"I don't know how you thought I wouldn't recognize you," I said, "Why are you here?"

"Because you won't tell us your new address." My mother said with a manipulative-type frown. She just hated not being in control.

"I'm working right now. I can't have private conversations. I'll bring an orange juice and two coffees." I ordered for them without asking and with the idea that they might leave faster. I bit my tongue from saying anything else, an irritation rolling up my shoulders that couldn't have been caused by anyone other than my mother. I hadn't told her for a reason. But still she found a way to come here, not only to disturb my work, but to badger me for my new address. Which she was not going to be getting from me.

I brought their beverages and rushed to the back where I hung my apron on the rack to sneak out before they noticed and followed me to my apartment.

"You're done?" Yuuko said as she came from her interview. I slipped my arms through my coat sleeves.

"Yes. I'll see you tomorrow in class." I made a break for the back door of Teppan.

"Wait, before you leave, I wanted to ask you something. Like a favor." I stopped but held my hand on the doorknob.

"Depends on what it is."

"Well, my little sister is graduating high school soon and she's been wanting to get a tutor to help her study. I was wondering if you might help her. Maybe just for an hour or two," She bit the inside of her cheek with a smack, "But you're so smart, maybe tutoring is a burden."

I let the faintest of a smile cross me. Perhaps tutoring would have been a burden if I hadn't helped one of the lowest-scoring students Tonan had, and more than once.

"It's no problem. I've tutored before." I said. Yuuko seemed surprised.

"Really? I thought I would have heard about it. Who?"

"Kotoko."

For less than a millisecond, she looked piqued.

"Well, if you can help her, you can help anyone. Have you considered becoming a teacher? I think a lot of people could benefit from it."

I hadn't and I wouldn't. The idea wasn't appealing, as I'd had a hard time not getting frustrated with Kotoko while helping her study. And I couldn't see myself with such a career.

"I can help your sister after work some days." I turned the doorknob.

"Thank you, Irie-kun. Just tell me what days. See you."

 _A teacher_ … I thought with disinterest as I stepped into the alley. I glanced around to be positive the badly-disguised trio wasn't outside, and from there I walked home without anyone hitching along behind me.

 **A/N: Happy weekend ^.^**


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter Thirty-Five**

I was a bit groggy on my way to my classes. With studying, working a job that had me on my feet, and teaching Yuuko's younger sister, I was wasted so far. Her sister, Ayako… I could have sworn she would have been able to do all of her work properly and without any help. But she just insisted on the tutoring.

I supposed that was up to her, however, so I kept up the tutoring consistently, every other night for the last week.

The walk to the university kept me as awake as I could be in the recent light of me not getting enough sleep. A canned coffee brought me to life through my tired stupor as I sat in on my first class of the day.

Yuuko followed me to the door at the end of class and began her usual conversations.

"So, you're coming over to help Ayako study again tonight, right?" She said. That had been the plan all along, hadn't it?

"Right." I said. She flashed her teeth at me.

"Great. Was there anything you wanted to go over with her that I could inform her about?"

"Not really."

She tailed me all the way to our next class, as I so very coincidentally, had most of my classes with her. Meanwhile, I gathered those around me and searched for one person in particular. One I hadn't seen for about four days at this point. She'd bugged me at Teppan once or twice and that was the last I'd seen of her.

In a spot of luck, I saw her pacing down the walkway to her next class quite a ways away. But even from where I stood, she didn't look too well, possibly ill. From the sluggish way she was walking and how pale she was, it made me wonder.

"Are you two close?" Yuuko asked out of nowhere. I looked to her with a question. Her eyes swam over to Kotoko, "You and Aihara?"

I shook my head in denial, "Not even a little." Yuuko didn't seem very convinced.

"I'll meet you in class. First I have to go do something." I forked off the walkway.

She said, "See you in a bit."

I waited until Yuuko was completely out of sight to get on over onto the trail leading to the art department. There, I scaled the stairs to find Kotoko again and maybe find out what was going on with her.

Finally, I found her silently climbing back down the stairs against the flow of students. I'd figured she would stop and try to talk when she saw me, but she was acting very odd. She looked right through me and walked past like I didn't exist. Bags prominent under her eyes and skin paler up close, she was like the walking dead. If I'd thought I was tired earlier, she must've been ten times worse. It didn't appear she'd slept the entire night.

I watched her almost trip on the bottom step and continue on like a zombie. And I really had no idea what was going on. Honestly, it worried me a little. Did it have anything to do with me being out of the house, or was she just overworking herself to get work done? I would have stopped tutoring Ayako if she needed my help, but she hadn't been around and hadn't even spoken to me. I couldn't help wondering if she just wasn't talking to me.

So, at the end of the day and the beginning of tennis practice, I changed in the locker rooms and came out to the courts.

I searched for Kotoko amongst the people picking up balls. Not there. For the chance that she'd moved her way up in the many practices I'd missed, I searched the players. Not there.

Sudo found me in the entrance of the chain link.

"Oh, Irie! It's been a long time since I last saw you here." He crowed.

"I just wanted some exercise." Still, I searched for the chance I'd missed her. Then again, with Kotoko being Kotoko, she would have stuck out like a sore thumb if she was practicing with the others.

"Aihara isn't here today," Sudo said, "Hasn't been for a couple of days now, actually. She said she hasn't been feeling well." But 'not feeling well' could've meant a whole range of things.

"Really?"

"Her tennis skills haven't improved, but she was so tough until now. It's the first time she's been missing practice since she joined."

For Kotoko to be missing practice, something she was so determined to get better at, she must've been quite sick. But if she was so sick, she should have been at home.

"Irie-kun!" I heard Yuuko call, "Come practice with me."

For an hour, I practiced with Yuuko, but my mind was in a totally different place.

After practice, I got ahold of Yuuki on the home phone and called him out to the park a couple blocks from the house. Maybe I could get some answers from him. He lived with her, after all. I sat on a bench reading until he came along.

He came running, pretty excited to see me, and plopped down next to me on the bench.

"Hey, how've you been?"

"Good!" Yuuki said with a sharp nod and broad smile, "What did you want to see me for?"

"No reason. Just wanted to see you and see how things are at home." I slid the book into my bag.

"Everything is normal. Mom is still trying to find out where you live, but Kotoko has been acting weird."

"How so?" I asked.

"I can't explain it. She's just really pale and always seems tired. She barely eats, too. And there's no reaction when I pick on her. It's no fun at all anymore."

Tired.

Not eating, but she loved food.

Not reacting to Yuuki's harsh way of playing when she'd used to be so sensitive to it.

It was off. I didn't like hearing it, and I hoped she would snap out of it. And whatever it was, I hoped it wasn't about anything more than the simple case of studying too rigorously.

Before the sun could go down, Yuuki played in the park while I kept watch on the bench and thought about what I could do to help. The problem was, I didn't think I could do anything.


	36. Chapter 36

**Chapter Thirty-Six**

The next day was the same, but today Kotoko looked a tad paler and she walked a tad slower. What was my mother doing by letting her come to school like that? Even Yuuko had noticed and said something about it at the beginning of class.

"Aihara looks like a ghost walking around." She commented and pursed her lips.

"Oh?"

"She must be stupidly overworking herself. If she's not cut out for college, she shouldn't waste her time." She said with a certain sharpness.

"Maybe so." I said, resting my chin in my palm and waiting for the lecture to start. In marched our professor who began right away. I took my notes and answered questions, but still this lingered on my mind. I couldn't help feeling as though school was not the reason for this.

I did my best to sweep away the thoughts and the class ended. Yuuko went on ahead of me as I packed my things into my bag.

The classroom door flew open and banged against the wall. Many peoples' attention was drawn to the explosion.

" _Is Naoki Irie here?_ " One of the two girls standing in the doorway said. The professor stared at them in bewilderment and gestured over to me.

The way they trooped to my desk was ridiculous looking at best. With faces scrunched up in anger and seeming like they wanted to pick a fight with me, they were moronic.

"Naoki Irie… There's something you need to be told!" The shorter one said with her arms crossed. The other nodded her head and followed suit in crossing her arms.

"Who are you?" I asked.

They gasped, "We went to high school together!" The taller, linky girl said, "You're supposed to be some genius, but you don't remember who we are?"

"I try not to remember things that aren't important." I said. The two were furious. It hit me. Their actions, the way they spoke, and reacted to things… it was fairly reminiscent of Class F. These were Kotoko's two idiot friends.

"Oh, I know. You two were both in Class F," I searched for their names, "Jinko and Satomi?" I said.

"No, the reverse. _I'm_ Satomi." The tall one said.

"And _I'm_ Jinko."

All while they were trying to get me to remember them, what I wanted to know was why they were here. I didn't have the time for this. I needed to get to my next class before I started running late.

"Why are you here?"

"Oh!" I seemed to have brought them back down their original train of thought, "It's about Kotoko."

"You really are terrible, you know that?" Jinko whined, "She's devastated because of you." She frowned at me.

"What about me?" I said, finally realizing that I could learn why she'd been so sickly.

"You think we don't know!" Satomi said, "You're living with Matsumoto Yuuko. And poor Kotoko followed you and saw it with her own eyes. She waited for three hours. You know she's in love with you, but you started living with someone else secretly!"

 _She_ would _have followed me home on a night I was tutoring Ayako…_ I thought. And she'd gotten the wrong idea, and now I was going to have to fix it somehow or she was only going to keep walking around as though her brain had been fried.

"How could you be so deceitful? Just be upfront and tell Kotoko how you really feel about her so she can move on. If you are a man, tell her directly."

What I found funny about them telling me this was that all they had were insinuations. They didn't really know what they thought they did, and I could only imagine the heart attack Kotoko would have had if I told her how I really felt so frankly. But, no. That wasn't happening.

I smirked, "So, I should tell her directly?" They seemed petrified for a moment.

"But, please choose your words _very_ carefully." Satomi smiled nervously.

"Just don't make her suffer anymore. We're not asking you to fall out of love with Matsumoto, but if there's no chance for Kotoko… just help her get over you."

"That was all we needed to say. Bye." They skittered away from me and out the door, but I was halted. It was my fault, then.

Instead of heading for my next class, I decided to head out to find her and set the record straight.

The complication with that was that I couldn't find her anywhere. She wasn't in her department or in mine or even at the tennis court or library. After searching everywhere, I concluded that she must've gone home where she should have been anyway.

Halfway through my classes for the day, I learned from the general gossip of those around me that she'd fainted from exhaustion in her first class and had gone home. This was taking more of a toll on her than I'd ever known.

…

I waited at the entrance for her at the beginning of the day. I'd have preferred to tell her yesterday, but to have gone to the house to see her would have been unbearable with the way my mother acted. Also, I didn't want it to seem too obvious.

Expecting to see Kotoko barely dragging herself along the walkway, I was surprised to find her with a spring in her step. She seemed happy, to be honest. I didn't take the time to wonder about this sudden change of attitude and caught her attention.

"Kotoko," I called to her as she approached. Her eyes fell as soon as she saw me and her spring was put to rest, "Do you have a minute?"

She nodded. I began my walk to class and she followed.

"How…" She began awkwardly, "How is your new place?"

"It's great."

"How about your meals?"

"I eat at Teppan, so I'm fine," I said, "Actually, I was wondering how things are at home." Kotoko was quiet.

"Your mother still wants to know where you live. She's upset you haven't told her. Maybe if you did, it would put her mind at ease. She _is_ only worried about you." She said in a dull voice.

I found the opportunity, "I won't. I'm too busy to be having her dropping in on me all the time. Between, school, work, and tutoring Yuuko's sister, I don't have the time for her."

Kotoko ripped her eyes off the ground and stared at me point-blank. Her mouth hung open.

"You're tutoring Matsumoto's sister?" She squeaked.

"Have been every other day for over a week." I said. Kotoko's face brightened considerably and she finally smiled at me.

You mean you're not living with… someone else?"

"I moved out to be alone. Why would I live with someone else?" Her smile widened and I could almost feel her buzzing with renewed hope. She was so simple. A grin played at me as well.

"Bye. I have to get to class." I said.

"See you later!" She said, bursting at the seams with energy. At least I knew she wouldn't be passing out again today.


	37. Chapter 37

**Chapter Thirty-Seven**

It was a busy night for Teppan. Like every other Friday night, customers came and went rapidly, ranging from only one person to large groups. And this week, it was not just that there were many people, but there were five groups of American Tourists and who knew how many more coming because of some international travelling group's arrival to Tokyo.

And not just that, but I'd been working an extra shift as it was. Now I was stuck here because I knew the most English.

Oishi waved me over as I gave orders to the cook and headed for another table.

"I've called Yuuko Matsumoto and she can come in in an hour." He said. Stress dug its hands out of my back. Relieved, I went on to serving the tourists.

I would be freer in an hour. Just an hour.

The door let in a stream of cold air. A man was hunched over and panting to catch his breath. He stood up straight and looked around.

I held in my displeasure at Kinnosuke being here.

When he spotted me, he promptly shouted, "Naoki Irie!" The whole restaurant glared at him.

"I'll only be a moment." I said to the customer I was serving and met Kinnosuke in the middle of the cafe.

"Why do you have to be so loud?" I said, completely disinterested at this point.

"You have to come with me." He heaved.

"Huh?" I said and narrowed my eyes at him.

"Your little brother is at Takao Hospital with Kotoko. There's something about a surgery needing to be done. They need you there."

My chest seized in a sort of panic. I rushed to the counter where Oishi stood working, "I have to leave now. I'm sorry."

"Yes, go. I'm sure we'll figure something out." He said.

Kinnosuke and I dashed out the cafe doors and I called for a taxi. We both shoved into the backseat. My mind ran in every direction.

"Takao Hospital." I said.

"Get us there as fast as you can!" Kinnosuke busted my left eardrum. The taxi sped down the street.

"What do you know about why he's there?" I said. My mind had conjured up many things in a couple of short minutes, from broken bones to falling down the stairs.

"Something about his stomach. It hurt so badly, he couldn't move." Kinnosuke said.

"You know, you need to tell people where to reach you. I ran around trying to find you at seven different cafes before I actually found you." Kinnosuke added.

As the time in the cab went by, I became more and more nervous. What if something happened before I could get there?

I drummed my fingers on my leg but nothing was going to calm me down right now. I stopped trying. Scared to death for Yuuki, we got to the hospital. I paid the taxi quickly and Kinnosuke and I found a nurse.

"Where is Yuuki Irie?" I asked urgently.

"He's just down the hall in room 308." I shot down there, Kinnosuke staying put in the waiting room.

I entered the room to find Yuuki pale and sweaty, cringing even in his sleep.

"Irie-kun!" Kotoko cried at me, "We were eating dinner and he just collapsed like this. The doctor can't do anything about it without a family member's consent." She was terrified, wrinkles on her forehead, her eyes wide.

"You're the older brother, I presume?" A doctor said as he came into the room.

"Yes." I nodded and he whisked me away into a separate room where I signed the documents for Yuuki to get the surgery he needed.

"For a thing like this," Dr. Kida said, "It's not usually fatal. But that's only if it's caught in time. An intussusception can turn deadly fast. That girl was very smart to call the hospital right away. If she'd left it overnight, it might've been dangerous."

I nodded, listening close.

"You're lucky she was around."

We headed back into Yuuki's hospital room where Kotoko was kneeled by his bed talking to him, a frown prominent.

"Am I going to die?" Yuuki asked me, his voice cracking and wobbly.

"No, it's a simple operation. It'll be quick." I assured him and squeezed his shoulder.

"Let's move him to the operation room." Dr. Kida moved in with a nurse and wheeled Yuuki out on a stretcher. Another nurse led Kotoko and I out of the room and to the waiting area.

"Wait here until the surgery is over." She said.

"Thank you very much." I said to her. Kotoko found Kinnosuke.

"He's going under now." She said.

"It'll be okay now, Kotoko. I have to be leaving. The restaurant is really busy." Kinnosuke ran his fingers through his hair.

"Thank you." Kotoko smiled at last.

"I'm glad everything's okay. See you later." He went for the door, but I had to say something… anything. This was my brother after all, and he'd run around town trying to find me.

"Ikezawa," I started, and as much as it pained me, I said, "thank you."

He turned on me, "Aren't you a little too selfish? I don't care if you want to live alone, but tell people where they can reach you! What would you have done if something happened to Yuuki?" I didn't want to know what could have happened if he didn't get that surgery because of me.

"There must be a good reason you want to be alone, but if something happens because of that, not only you, but the people around you will get hurt. It's too late if that happens." Even coming from such a stupid person, this spiel had some truth. It would've been my fault if Yuuki had ended up dying because I couldn't give my consent for surgery. I wouldn't have been able to live with that on my shoulders, and I couldn't imagine what it would have done to my parents.

"See you later, Kotoko." He said and left Kotoko and I in the waiting room.

I was silent, contemplating what he'd said. I'd have told people where I worked and lived if I'd known this would happen. But I didn't know.

"Irie-kun?" Kotoko said. I sat and rubbed my head, still saying nothing.

"Oh!" She whipped out her phone, "I forgot to call your mom… oh no, so many missed calls." She bit her lip.

"We're at a hospital, you know." I said.

"Right. I should make it outside." Kotoko tripped on the way to the door and fumbled with her phone.

It brought a half smile to my lips, but it didn't stick. My nerves were shot. I watched her through the glass doors. She was shaken to say the least. Certainly, it appeared her nerves were more shot than mine. She'd had the trouble of bringing him here and trying to find me after all. She'd done everything right, too. And I hadn't even thanked her yet.

I stood and went to the doors, thinking about what to do.

"You take care of yourselves, too. We'll be waiting here for you when you get back." Kotoko said and hung up the phone. She stood there, shivering in the wind and took a few deep breaths.

I pulled open the door and brought her to me in a hug from behind. She shivered again.

"Thank you, Kotoko." I said and hugged her tighter.

Not to my surprise, she began to cry.

"I was so scared." She whimpered. Kotoko spun around and squeezed me into a big hug, shaking and crying.

" _I was so scared, Irie-kun_!" She said into my shoulder and I wrapped my arms around her, trying my best to comfort her after I'd been the one to cause her all this distress.

"It's okay now." I rested my chin on the top of her head and she continued to cry into me. For the first time in what must've been many years, I felt truly awful. Guilt ate me from the inside out. I'd done this.

She calmed down and we waited inside for an hour, her eventually falling asleep in a waiting room chair.

Dr. Kida returned with good news and I stood, "The operation was a success, and Yuuki can move to the general ward tomorrow," He said, "You should go home for the night." I immediately had some protests. Yuuki had never actually spent a night alone.

"But…"

"You can't stay in the ICU and there's no place for you to sleep here. He is asleep right now anyway and probably will stay that way until morning. It's best if you just go and come back tomorrow."

"I understand. Thank you." I said. Kotoko woke and gazed around tiredly.

"Have a good night, you two." Dr. Kida smiled and was on his way. Kotoko got up and stretched with a yawn.

"How did it go?"

"The surgery went well and he can be moved to the general ward tomorrow. We should leave for the night now." I said. She furrowed her eyebrows at me.

"I'll stay with Yuuki-kun." She said, insistent as ever.

"You can't. You should just leave it up to the doctors now."

"No, really…" She tried again.

"No, really, you should get some rest. He's going to be okay here." From the look in her tired eyes, it seemed that that was all she really wanted right at the moment. Yet still she hesitated.

"Let's go. I'll take you home." She caved and followed me to the door.

Outside, snow littered the ground and swept by my face in a gust of freezing air. The streets were deserted other than the few remaining cars making their way around. No taxis.

"It's cold." Kotoko said and rubbed her hands together. I checked the time in high hopes we hadn't missed the last train. No chance. It had left an hour ago.

"We missed the last train," I said. I searched the streets for any sign of a taxi, one last time, "It doesn't look like we can get a cab either."

"What are we going to do?"

There was no other option unless I wanted to take an hour and a half to walk her home, then another to get back to my apartment. She could just spend the night with me.

"Do you want to sleep at my apartment? It's only about fifteen minutes from here." I said. She lit up. There was my answer. I began down the sidewalk and she tailed me.

"Wait, what about an umbrella?" She grappled with her bag and flung out an umbrella. It popped open, nearly hitting me in the face.

"Careful with that." I said. She held it over both our heads.

"Sorry." Kotoko giggled.

Snow blew harder through the trees and buildings. I shoved my hands deep into my pockets, wishing it to end.

Kotoko, on the other hand, smiled in the face of it, "It's so beautiful. I love snow."

"You would." I mumbled, as there must not have been _anything_ she found troublesome or annoying.

"Hm?"

"Nothing."

Kotoko rambled non-stop for the next five minutes and then the rest of the walk was quiet. I wondered what she was thinking now.

I buzzed us into my building and brought her to my apartment down the hall. I unlocked the door and stepped in, but Kotoko continued to stare in from the hallway. She pressed her lips together, nervous but elated.

"Come in." I said. She nodded and shuffled inside.

"Thanks." She said.

I took off my shoes. Kotoko went on staring at everything in the apartment in awe of it. But surely, there was nothing special about a bookshelf.

"Stop staring at things." I said.

She did not listen.

Realizing in a snap that I had out a certain picture, I discreetly slipped it into the desk drawer.

"Has Matsumoto been here?" Kotoko asked, suddenly becoming less elated.

"No. You are the first person I've brought here." She shone. Assuming she wanted to get some rest soon, I decided to put off my shower.

"Do you want to take a shower?" This proposition startled her and she waved it off.

"No, no, you go first."

"I can take one after you."

"This is your place. You can go first," she said, "Oh, right… I have to call your mom and tell her the operation was successful. You just go on ahead." She reached for her phone and started to dial. I couldn't fathom what the problem was. It was just a shower.

But I supposed I was going to have to go first. I got my things together and headed into the bathroom.

I took a quick shower and dressed. Outside, Kotoko sat stiffly in a chair around my dining table. I took to my dresser, digging out some clean clothes for her to wear to bed. She was so short, I wasn't even sure they'd fit her, but they would have to do well enough.

"Here," I handed her the clothes, "You can wear something of mine for tonight."

She rose from the chair, "Oh… thank you. See you in a little."

"Towels are in the bathroom closet." I said as I opened a book.

She shambled into the bathroom awkwardly and closed the door. I blocked out the sound of her talking to herself and read for the next half hour as she showered and got ready for bed.

When she came out of the bathroom, my clothes flooded around her feet and way past her hands.

"Thank you for the bath." She said.

"Sure," I set the book on the table, "I'm going to sleep."

Kotoko danced for the floor beside the bed, "Okay. I'll sleep here so you can have the bed." Her smile burned her cheeks bright red.

"That _is_ how it should be." I said and watched her scrunch her face up.

"You're supposed to say, 'No, I will sleep on the floor so you can use the bed'." She made a grand gesture with her arms. I repressed a laugh.

"I was kidding," I stole a blanket from the shelf beside my bed, "You sleep in the bed."

"Oh, but I would feel bad!"

"You started this. Whichever you want, just go to sleep." I finished making the bed on the floor and went for the light switch.

"But…"

"Goodnight." I took my place on the floor and she crawled in under the covers on the bed.

It hadn't been a solid minute before I heard, "...Hey." whispered to me from the bed.

"What is it?"

"Can you keep a nightlight on?" I watched the ceiling, becoming frustrated at all this fuss over showers and sleeping arrangements and now nightlights.

"I can't sleep unless it's dark." I said.

"But how will I be able to go to the bathroom without stepping on you?" It was a fair point, and it wouldn't have surprised me if she was afraid of the dark.

"Geez…" I got up to turn on the bedside lamp, the lowest form of lighting I had, "Is that good?"

"Yes. Thank you." I laid back down.

Again, less than a minute later, I heard another, "Hey."

"What is it now?" I asked.

"Aren't you cold down there?"

"Of course I'm cold. It's winter."

Kotoko sat up sloppily and climbed out of the covers, "I'll sleep on the floor instead."

"Just go to sleep already." This was becoming stupid.

"But I feel bad. It's cold…" I stopped her right there.

"Alright then. Enough. I'll sleep in the bed, too." I said and stepped out from under the blankets.

Kotoko's eyebrows raised, "What?" I climbed into the bed beside her.

"W-wait a second, I'll sleep on the floor."

"It's okay. You'll be quiet if it's like this." I pulled a pillow over to myself and closed my eyes, although I didn't get very far with the lamp in them, "Goodnight."

It took her a moment to decide to lay down, but I didn't feel her trying to sleep. She settled for adjusting herself. She laid still after another minute. This time it was me who disturbed the silence.

"Are you disappointed I'm not trying anything with you?" I said.

"No… I'm not." She said, but I heard it in her tone. She'd never been very convincing when lying.

"I don't want it to go according to my mother's plan." I explained, "If she were to find out you stayed the night and something had happened, it would be exactly what she would want. Then she'd control me forever. It was the reason I didn't tell her this address."

"I kind of understand." Kotoko said, and I just knew she was smiling.

"You know how she is. If I did, she'd invite herself over, make a spare key, make me dinner… then there would be no point to living alone. I didn't want to follow their path anymore, so I moved out to figure out what I wanted to do with my life. I won't just take over my father's company for the sake of doing it." I didn't know why I was spilling all of this now, but it felt kind of good.

"Speaking of which, I thought about this at the hospital today," She began, "Lives can depend on split-second decisions. Something really small can make something curable become incurable. I thought about how intense a doctor's job can be, and how smart they all have to be. And then I thought you could do all that. You could invent new medicines or learn how to cure a disease in a second. You have a lot of potential." She explained it with such excitement, her voice high. She made it sound fun.

 _A doctor?_ I thought. I hadn't considered it, but now that I thought about it, it seemed sort of thrilling… being able to save people's lives and cure illnesses and figure out solutions to problems people hadn't thought of yet.

"There are so many possibilities, but it means nothing if you don't know what you want to do. I was so bored at home, doing nothing about it. But now my life has become so busy, and I've started realizing little by little…" I wondered if I should say anything, "what's important to me, and what I'm interested in."

I thought about telling her how I felt about her, for a brisk moment… telling her that she was someone so important to me.

Kotoko was silent. I turned onto my other side to find her fast asleep. The idea left me. I would probably never tell her.

Her face was so peaceful and happy in sleep, as though there was nothing plaguing her. She left me awake so I could deal with my own plagues by myself, sort them out before I made the rash decision to tell her who she was to me.

"You're always like this at important times." I said to the sleeping Kotoko.

 _It's true, isn't it?_ I asked myself, like I didn't already know. _I love her, don't I?_

I was content in the answer, content with my feelings for her.

I knew I'd finally accepted it, fully.

…

I woke mid-morning alone in my apartment. I got out of bed to get ready to go to the hospital. I was slowed down by what I found on the table.

A pot of coffee, a mug, and a note.

I poured a cup of the coffee as I sat and read the note.

 _I'm going to the hospital now to check on Yuuki._

 _Please have some coffee if you want._

 _P.S. I liked the talk we had last night._

 _Kotoko_

I took a sip of the succulent coffee, one of the only things she knew how to do exceptionally well. Even in it being cold, it tasted great. I woke up through the cup and got dressed.

The walk to the hospital woke me up even more and I stopped by a flower shop on the way, picking up a bouquet of flowers at random.

I came to the hospital and went for the desk.

"Where is Yuuki Irie's room?" I asked.

"Room 257. I was getting ready to make a run down there in a minute. Why don't I show you the way?" A nurse said. She came out from behind the desk.

"That'd be great. Thanks." I said. She gestured for me to follow her and we walked to an elevator, where we took off for the second floor.

"Are you his older brother? He's been asking about when you're coming." The nurse asked.

"Yes, I am."

She smiled at me. "Your little brother is doing very well."

"That's good to hear."

"The young lady came early in the morning and took care of him. I think it helped to comfort him."

We arrived to room 257 and she slid the door open. She giggled.

"Oh, she must be so tired."

Inside the room, Kotoko sat in a chair, her head laid on Yuuki's bed, in a deep sleep. She didn't stir.

"Let's not wake her up." The nurse fiddled with Yuuki's IV and looked down to Kotoko, "Your girlfriend is cute," I'd never thought the day would come that I didn't object to that kind of mistake, "Enjoy your stay." She said and left us alone.

With Yuuki and Kotoko both asleep, there was almost no reason for me to be here. I sat down the flowers on the bed and examined the decorations Kotoko had made and put up around Yuuki's bed. On a small table, treats piled high. Above his bed read 'Get well, Yuuki!'. Origami animals cluttered the floor and the bed in front of her.

Kotoko had done all this without even being asked... so great. I'd reprimanded her for being stupid all this time, but I hadn't credited how caring she was and even to Yuuki who pestered her constantly. She was unconditionally sweet. Maybe I didn't deserve her.

I went around and sat on the bed next to Kotoko. Still, she didn't wake. So deep in sleep. She was amazing. My mind was overrun with only one thought that I couldn't drive away this time.

I leaned down over her and my lips touched hers for the second time. Enveloped in total bliss, it was hard to pull away. Part of me wished she would wake and catch me so I wouldn't have to wonder about if I would ever tell her.

Kotoko didn't wake up, but someone did. Bringing myself away from her, my eyes landed on Yuuki, sitting up partially. He gawked at me, maybe never having been in a bigger shock in his life. To not wake Kotoko, I put one finger to my lips, unable to contain my grin. I relayed to him my secret in that simple motion.

Yuuki stared me out the door of the hospital room.

It looked like this secret was out there whether I wanted it to be or not.


	38. Chapter 38

**Chapter Thirty-Eight**

I hung my apron on its rack and got my coat, done with my lunch shift at Teppan. I'd been taking on these shifts since dropping a class I thought useless. Kotoko had been coming occasionally for lunches here, though today I hadn't seen her. Matter of fact, I hadn't even seen her around the university today.

I braced myself against the harsh winter air on the ten minute walk back to school. The chill was worse than it was last year at around this time, and the wind was nothing less than jagged shards of glass cutting through my coat.

I finally got to the school grounds about five minutes until the time I'd allotted myself in the library before my last class in an hour. On the way there, I kept an eye out for Kotoko. On days she didn't come to bug me at Teppan, I liked to watch and make sure she was okay because sometimes she tended to overwork herself. I didn't see her anywhere around.

At the library, I found a table near the windows and set down my bag and coat. And I went right for a section I'd barely charted into in the past… the medical section.

I couldn't stop thinking about it since Kotoko brought it up. Perhaps I would be a good doctor or surgeon, and it would be something I actually enjoyed. The idea had been sticking with me since last week until I'd finally given in to it and now I found myself here, studying it.

I picked a few books and gathered myself at the table. These were introductory books, but with a subject as intricate as the medical field, they were heavy. The weight of them in my hands was invigorating, all of this new information to learn giving me a rush.

What was in these books was somewhat complicated, at least for the average student. But I understood them fine. The words were long, the pages filled with charts and illustrations, and the paragraphs packed into small print. I looked over all three, all of them being essentially the same thing. I read through the first one for the hour I had and brought the other two back to their shelves. I checked out the one that remained, all these new words and meanings swimming around in between my ears.

They settled at last as I began my walk across the university for my last class of the day. This time, my eyes landed right on her.

Kotoko was not alone, but she wasn't with her friends or Kinnosuke. Not even Sudo. This guy was unfamiliar, but with the way he spoke to Kotoko, he must've known her. And if she did know him, it confused me how I'd never heard of him or seen him before now. I walked right past them, watching as she laughed at something he said. Something about them together was off.

I sat in my desk in class, trying to reach around in my memory for any mention of him. Maybe put a name to a face. And I hoped they weren't how they seemed.

Unluckily for me, I had this class with Yuuko. It was not as though I didn't enjoy her company, but I didn't particularly want to talk right as she sat down beside me.

"You must be in a good mood." She said, although there can't have been anything that indicated such.

"Why?"

Yuuko pressed her lips shut in a sealing motion, "You don't know?"

The professor interrupted any questions I had.

Class went on, however this subject became duller every day. I'd been seriously considering a switch for at least four days now and every time I came to these classes I held no interest in, it became clearer. Then I would think of my parents and how they would react.

They would be furious I wasn't following their plan. Little did they know, they already had half of what they wanted… for me to feel something for Kotoko… but since they didn't know it, it meant nothing and it meant that I was going against them in every single way.

I took notes, but not as many as when I'd first started the year, and Yuuko left without me at the end of class. No way I'd be getting any answers from her now.

On the way out the door, my phone rang. Seeing that it was my mother, I contemplated answering, but accepted it anyway.

"Hello?"

"Onii-chan, I'm surprised you answered. You never answer my calls anymore!" She whined from the other end of the line and reminded me of why I didn't want to answer.

"Is there something you wanted?" I said, the wind slicing at my cheeks as soon as I stepped outside of the building.

"We barely see you anymore, so I thought I'd invite you to come over to dinner tonight." She would have gone on had I let her.

"Fine," I agreed. It would keep her off my case for now, "What time is it for?"

"Yay! _Papa, Naoki is coming over for dinner tonight!_ " She yelled to my father.

"Mom, what time?" I asked and she came back.

"Six o'clock. Can't wait to see you."

"Bye." I hung up and let my phone fall into my bag.

My legs were numb by the time I made it back to my apartment. I sat on my bed, warming up as I took out the medical book I'd checked out. For the hour and a half that I had to read it, I picked up where I left off. The more I read, the more interesting it seemed. The more I wanted out of the science and engineering department.

At five, I put it down and headed for a train station. It was too cold out to want to walk, so I would bear the overcrowded station.

I caught a train just in time and walked the rest of the way to my parents' house. My mother let me in the door and hustled right back to the kitchen where I heard Kotoko say, " _Oops!_ "

I chuckled.

She emerged with a plate of food, "The yakitori is done!" She brought it to the dining room table and went back for more.

"Naoki," My father called from the living room. I took off my shoes and joined him, "How've you been? We haven't seen much of you."

"Busy." I said and sat on the couch.

There was a doorbell. I hadn't been aware anyone else was coming.

My mother answered the door and paused, "Who are you?" She said.

"I'm here for Kotoko." It was the voice of a guy, but I didn't know him. At least it wasn't Kinnosuke.

"Oh, okay. Kotoko, you have a visitor!"

"Be right there!" There was a clank in the kitchen.

"This way." My mother led him forward. I took a quick glance at him and did a double-take. This was the guy from earlier.

"What's your name?" My mother asked him.

"Takendo Nakagawa."

I got to my feet and stood in the doorway, my back against the doorframe. Maybe I could finally understand what was going on.

Kotoko came out of the kitchen and stopped in her tracks, "Oh, it's you. What are you doing here?" She smiled at him.

"I have something for you. It's just something small." He held out a fancily-wrapped box for her to take.

"A present?" She took it and gazed at its wrappings and bow, "Thank you. It's so pretty, I won't want to open it," She rattled it a little as she led him away, "I bet I can guess what it is!"

My mother hurried to me, "Aren't you worried about that, Naoki?"

"What is there to be worried about? It's none of my business anyway." I tore my eyes away from them, now fully understanding. I clenched my teeth.

"So you're okay with Kotoko dating someone else? I don't believe that for one second." She whispered in my ear and frowned at me. My temper flared.

"I don't think 'dating' is the proper term. More like 'taking a fleeting interest until he realizes what she's really like'. Clumsy, stupid, pushy… there's no way it'll last very long." My mother hit my arm.

"Don't say such mean things."

I couldn't stop my eyes from wandering back over to them. All they were doing was talking, her smiling at him. But it bothered me to no end. I chewed at the inside of my cheek to distract from the fury shooting through me and the tension running rampant along my back and shoulders.

He touched her hand and I balled my fist. That was when I forced myself to sit back down and stop watching entirely. Whatever happened, happened.

A minute later, Takendo Nakagawa left through the front door and my mother called everyone to the table to eat.

I took the seat I always sat in and everyone filled their plates.

"Kotoko," Kotoko's father began, "Who was that just now? I don't think I know him."

"I met him at school today." She said, but my mother interrupted.

"He didn't ask you out, did he?" Panic made her eyes wide. I thought of leaving. I didn't want to hear.

Kotoko pressed her lips together awkwardly and said, "Yes, he did." She peered over to me, but I refused to look.

"You didn't agree, did you?"

"Well, no, but…"

"Oh, Kotoko is going to be taken from us!" My mother went on, ever the over dramatic, "Don't you care, Naoki?"

"Not at all. She can date whoever she wants." I threw a piece of food into my mouth. She turned to Kotoko.

"I'm so sorry. If only he was nicer, you wouldn't want to date someone else." My mother sighed.

"It's okay. There's nothing going on between us anyway, and Takendo is really nice."

My brain boiled and my gut twisted into little knots as I stabbed a piece of meat. No one noticed and the two of them went on.

"He's pretty cute too, huh?"

Kotoko giggled, "When he smiles, he looks like he could be a movie star."

"A catch like that would be hard to resist." My mother poked Kotoko. My appetite deteriorated little by little.

"It won't last long, though. Anyone would be crazy to like Kotoko," Yuuki said and then he caught sight of me and it was as though he'd remembered, "Maybe not _anyone_." He corrected.

"Ah, perhaps Yuuki has joined my side!" My mother said in triumph.

Of course he had. Yuuki strived to be like me, and now that he knew of how I felt about Kotoko, there was no doubt that he accepted it.

The conversations straightened themselves out into normal topics, but my mind had yet to do so. I finished the food I had on my plate, wanting nothing more than to leave. I stood and brought my plate to the kitchen.

"I should be going. There's some work I need to catch up on." I said.

"So soon? You just got here." Kotoko said. I narrowed my eyes at her and nodded.

"See you later." I layered on my coat and put on my shoes.

"Bye."

Outside, the air was more refreshing than it was a nuisance. Confusion hit me over the head. I didn't get it. Then I understood.

She didn't know I'd kissed her. So while so much had been going on in my head and I'd taken fifty steps closer to her, her feet remained intact on the same ground they'd been on for probably a year. And because of that, she was now taking a different route. I had no one to blame but myself for it.

A twisted part of my mind thought this was funny. How many times now had I upset her by going out with someone else or showing no interest? The tables had turned when I wasn't even looking.

This had to be karma.


	39. Chapter 39

**Chapter Thirty-Nine**

She sat alone at her regular table, sneaking glimpses at me over the menu. I stopped to think that maybe things were already over between her and Takendo Nakagawa. But something about it didn't seem very true. With that, what was she doing here? Kotoko liked to eat at Tonan for lunch most days.

I went to take her order and she stopped peeking out from behind the menu.

"What are you having?" I said.

"I'm not ordering yet," She checked the door, "Just so you know, I'm not here for you today."

My jaw clenched shut as Teppan's door swung open and in came Nakagawa. He waved and strutted to Kotoko's table. Shamelessly, he slid into the chair beside her and hung his arm around her shoulders. I almost rolled my eyes.

"Hey, don't do that…" Kotoko tried to shrug him off but he didn't budge. Instead, he bared his teeth in a wide grin. My teeth dug into each other. If she didn't want him touching her, he should have gotten his arm off of her.

"I'll be back in a few minutes so you can order." I said although it took a lot in me to not sound cross.

Kotoko's brows knitted together and familiar creases formed on her forehead. As I walked away, she was finally able to shrug his arm off of her and the creases smoothed.

I went into the employee bathroom and took a moment to cool off. This guy… he irked me. I didn't know exactly what it was about him. Maybe he was too confident, or bold… or touchy. I snapped myself out of it.

Back out in the dining area, Kotoko found me with a huge smile. She called me over. Her eyes followed me as I directed myself over to her and Nakagawa. Still, her expression was filled with the admiration she held for me since the day I met her.

"Do you know what you'll be having?" I asked.

"Yes," Kotoko said, "I'll have the zosui."

I looked to Nakagawa, "Unadon." He said.

I gave their orders to the kitchen and worked on my attitude for another brief moment. I cleaned the table of a customer who'd just left and brought someone their food. Then I brought Kotoko and Nakagawa their lunch, not paying attention to either of them.

My shift ended and I hung my apron up, leaving for Tonan.

I spent another hour in the library, studying the medical books as I had been every day since last week when I first went. The books carried on, and an unwanted subject crept its way into the crevices of my mind. I ignored it as I read, but for my last class of the day, it rang through me as loudly as a siren.

Kotoko was dating that guy. Actually _dating_ him. That had to have meant she liked him in some way, but what was that? For a full two years, she'd been chasing after me and claiming to love me. But how could that be if she was interested in someone else?

My fingernails clawed at my palm. I didn't understand.

"Are you okay?" Yuuko mouthed at me as the professor explained some concept.

And although I was sure I didn't look it, I mouthed back, "Yes."

At the end of the day, I decided to go to tennis practice for exercise and to maybe clear away my negative thoughts. And maybe I'd get to see Kotoko without that pest buzzing around her like some loyal pet wagging its tail on end.

When I got to practice, Yuuko waved me right over and we started a match. I kept an eye out for Kotoko, who I still hadn't seen since I got to Tonan after my lunch shift.

She came in late, sneaking through the gates as usual.

"Aihara!" Sudo bit her head off, "What are you doing late? There are balls that need to be picked up!"

"Yes!" She got cracking on it, wheeling the little basket around when someone else came in through the gates. Anger stiffened me and I gripped my racket tighter, almost missing one of Yuuko's balls.

He strutted right over to Kotoko and helped her pick up balls. They spoke in hushed tones. And then Sudo noticed them.

"Who are you? You aren't part of the tennis club." He asked. I strongly hoped Sudo would make him leave. Nakagawa shouldn't have been here in the first place.

This time, I did miss one of Yuuko's balls.

"Woah," She said, "You always get my underhands. Are you sure you're okay? You really are acting strange today."

I had no answer for her and tossed the ball back her way as I continued to eye Sudo, Nakagawa, and Kotoko across the court.

I didn't hear the rest of what was said, but Sudo left them and Nakagawa stayed.

 _Why is he still here?_

I really didn't understand it. Sudo had rules (one of them being that only club members came to practice), he was the club leader, and he wasn't abiding by his own regulations? Agitation popped at my shoulders and sizzled through the back of my head. Having him around was frustrating.

Yuuko missed and the ball came over to me. Anger surging, I served the ball and hard. It whipped past Yuuko's face. She seemed shocked.

I served again and she hit it this time, matching me in strength. I caught it straight on.

Across the way, Kotoko and Nakagawa continued to pick up balls. He said something and she laughed and said something back. He touched her hand.

I swung my racket through the air and pummeled the ball over to Yuuko who returned the favor. The match became harder and quicker, helping me to get out my frustration. And Yuuko was the best opponent for that, too.

Nakagawa wiped a piece of hair away from Kotoko's eyes. I lost it. My vexation reached soaring heights, and my whole body sizzled with boiling blood.

I dove for Yuuko's return, but was slammed in the jaw with the ball. I fell to my knees from the jolt of it and held my hand to my face.

"Irie-kun!" Yuuko called. I moved my jaw around to be sure it wasn't injured. And it wasn't, but there was going to be a bruise.

"I'm so sorry!" She rushed to my side of the net, but I didn't need the help getting up. I was finally able to catch my breath from that intense match.

"Are you okay?" Yuuko gazed at me worriedly.

"Yeah," I said as I began to taste blood in my mouth from where I'd bitten my tongue, "but I think I'm done for today."

Kotoko noticed something was up at last and looked to me questioningly. I ignored her and went for the locker rooms where I sat on the bench calming down.

I closed my eyes and held my forehead. The silence was better than being out there, seeing those two. I hated it so much.


	40. Chapter 40

**A/N: I promise I'm getting back on track with posting chapters. x'D**

 **Chapter Forty**

The slight taint of purple left on my jaw from a bruise now departing reminded me every time I looked in a mirror that things were out of my control. I couldn't believe I'd become so overwhelmed I'd let myself get hit in the jaw, and I couldn't believe how angry I was afterward. Not just with myself, but with Kotoko and Nakagawa too.

For a week I'd been purposely avoiding her and I wondered if she knew why or even knew I was avoiding her. I didn't go back to practice and I worked most days after class, also spending a lot of time reading medical books either in the library or at my apartment.

This time, I was at the library. Naturally, the books were becoming more difficult and touched on more complicated subjects, but it presented me with a challenge and I enjoyed that.

With classes ended, I headed for Teppan to tackle my next shift. Medical procedures ran through my head on the walk and it was just enough to keep my thoughts pleasant.

I hadn't seen Kotoko in the cafe since she last brought Nakagawa here, and for that I was relieved but also unhappy. Things must've been going well with that moronic simpleton. A small part of me believed that Kotoko had been dating him and brought him to Teppan simply to show me up, or to make me angry. But since she hadn't come back for a week, it didn't seem very true.

I hung the apron around my neck and tied it in the back. Yuuko gave more orders to the cooks and I hopped right to my job.

"Careful of that table over there." Yuuko gestured discreetly toward a table in the center of this busy night, "The kid likes to throw his food." I spotted this kid and he smiled devilishly. Thankfully, it wasn't my table. All I had to do was watch out for spare morsels being flung my way.

My shift went smoothly and I was hit with no food. Day transitioned into night and my time was coming to a close.

I'd almost completely forgotten about Kotoko… and then she shuffled in through the door, battling the harsh wind, her scarf flapping against her face. She seated herself in my section, as always, and shedded her coat. She glanced over the menu.

"Isn't she dating someone?" Yuuko said, pursing her lips, "She really _doesn't_ back down, does she?"

I brought myself over to her table, already guessing what was up, "Are you ordering now or later?"

"Hm?" She tore her eyes away from the menu, "Oh, I'm ordering later." She flashed me that brilliant smile, but I was perturbed. Of all places, why did she like to choose here for her dates? To show off that she was over me or something?

"Waiting for Nakagawa?" I said under my breath.

"What?"

"Nothing. I'll be back when you're ready." I wandered over to stand with Yuuko as we awaited more customers and the night was slowing down.

"Geez, she really is shameless, isn't she?" Yuuko said, though that was her last comment.

Kotoko headed for the bathrooms in the back. Less than a minute later, in strode Nakagawa with an irritatingly pleasant look on his face, scanning the room for her. I decided I didn't care anymore and took it upon myself to show him to the table.

"She's in the bathroom. You can wait here." I said. Nakagawa threw his coat over the back of the chair but didn't sit.

"Where are the bathrooms?" He asked. I pointed them out and off he went. What he was up to, I wouldn't have known.

He stood over there, waiting outside the girls' bathroom for a good few minutes before Kotoko emerged. I watched them over secretly. They spoke in low whispers, and then Nakagawa leaned in close to Kotoko. Ice shot through my veins. I was as still as a statue. Breaking out of that, I'd almost taken a step toward them when another person flew through the door. Yet another person I wasn't fond of. Kinnosuke crazily searched the dining area and his eyes landed on both Kotoko and Nakagawa in the bathroom entrance.

"Hey!" He screeched and raced forward, tearing the two apart, "What do you think you're doing?" He shoved Nakagawa away from Kotoko. Surprisingly, I was grateful to him then. He did exactly what I'd wanted to do.

"Kin-chan!"

"What are you doing? Don't take advantage of Kotoko like that!" Kinnosuke continued, utterly enraged. He went after Nakagawa again, but this time Nakagawa fought back. Kinnosuke stumbled from a hit to the face, but he was resilient.

"No! Stop that!" Kotoko wailed at them. She tried to pull them apart but had nil effect, her arms as strong as toothpicks.

The two went at each other like wild. Kinnosuke wrapped his hands around Nakagawa's neck.

"I knew you were going to make a move on her!"

"What are you talking about, Kin-chan? Stop it _now_!" Again, Kotoko tried to pry them apart.

Fists flew. Before anyone knew it, they were out in the dining area, throwing each other on the ground, bloody noses and cracked lips prominent.

Yuuko emerged from the kitchen, finally noticing all the noise, "What's- why are those idiots fighting?" She gave them a disgusted look as a couple of servers tore them apart from each other. But that hadn't stopped customers from leaving.

Having already been separated, they went for each other again. In one final straw, I stepped in. Pushing them both in the opposite directions, I said, "Haven't you two had enough? We're running a business here and you're scaring away customers," I stepped away from them, "Could it be…" I took a glance at a guilt-trodden, embarrassed-looking Kotoko, "You were fighting over her?" Kinnosuke rubbed his hand. He then appeared offended, "You don't even know the half of it. Just stay out of it." He wiped his nose.

In chimed Nakagawa, "I've heard all about you, and you don't even like Kotoko, so it's none of your business." I narrowed my eyes at him.

"What I find funny is that you think fighting over it is going to make her like either of you. I would stay out of it, but it seems you don't know that Kotoko loves _me_." Kotoko's expression lightened.

I looked to the clock and slipped out of my apron, "My shift is over anyway. Let's leave, Kotoko." She was stunned into silence as I took her by the arm, grabbed her coat, and led her out of the place.

Since her house was far away compared to my apartment, I opted for the train. We caught one just in time for its departure. There weren't so many people surrounding us, but Kotoko was speechless.

It was only after we'd gotten off at our stop that she opened her mouth.

"I have something to say," She said. I listened, "I'm sorry. I caused all this." Had she, now? Just with that, she almost didn't have to say anything more. I knew where this was going.

"I was just… trying to make you jealous." She looked to her feet as we walked.

"You think I didn't know that this whole time?" I asked, "You're too obvious. I'm not stupid."

"Oh… well…"

"I would never be jealous of Nakagawa." Her guilty eyes bored into me and it lifted into relief.

"You're not mad?" I didn't even have to answer her and she cracked that famous smile at me, the one that broke my resolve every time.

Every. Single. Time.


	41. Chapter 41

**Chapter Forty-One**

She snuck glances at me while reading through the menu. I caught her and she looked away quickly, as though she was stealthy at all. But the reason she was here was obvious, so it was of no use.

"Are you going to order yet?" I said to her.

"Say, Irie-kun…" She held her chin in the palm of her hand, "Are you coming home on Christmas Eve?"

"I'm working," Her face fell. Christmas Eve was one of the busiest nights for restaurants. It was funny she didn't know that although her father was the owner of one, "You're not going to order anything?"

"Coffee."

"Sitting here all day and ordering nothing but coffee is going to make you sick." I said, pointing out that this was her third cup. She had nothing to say for herself. I refilled her and was on my way.

This time, she left after she finished and confronted the raging wind and snow storm outside. One week from Christmas, this kind of weather was frequent. The snow stuck and ice slickened the sidewalks. The sun couldn't have been seen for many days.

I, myself, didn't enjoy this weather. Kotoko, on the other hand, was mad for it. Outside the door, she stood, ready with her umbrella, and tilted her head back to catch snowflakes on her tongue. I shook my head at how jovial she was about this dark, cold winter. I failed to see the fun in it.

What I did find fun, however, was watching her get so caught up in it.

Soon, Kotoko was gone from sight and I pushed through the last hours of work. A snowy day wore into a slightly less snowy night.

The last customer left and me and another employee, Amano, swept up, cleaning tables as we went. Going to lock up, someone appeared in the door. It was rare to see my father here, so he must've wanted something from me. I postponed locking up. I told Amano it was okay to keep cleaning and led my father to the counter where he seated himself on a stool.

"What are you doing here so late?" I asked. He took off his coat and draped it over his arm.

"I was just on my way home and I had something I needed to ask you, and your mother wants to know too," I sat beside him, "I'm sure you already know about Pandai's Christmas Eve party, right?" I could've told him before he asked that I wasn't interested in attending, but I let him continue for the sake of his visit.

"That's right. I do." Amano looked over to me, mouthing that she was finished cleaning. The only thing left to do was lock the doors.

" _You can leave now. I'll do it._ " I mouthed back. She nodded and left through the kitchen door.

"Well, I would like for you to attend. Please." He said. I sighed.

"I know why you want me there. You want to introduce me as your successor, but I don't know that I want to take over your company." I felt a little bad to be lying to him, since I already knew for a fact that I didn't want to lead Pandai in the future.

"I know that," He said, certainly more agreeable than my mother, "But just this once, please attend the party. Right now, that is all I ask of you. Just show up."

"I'll see if I can, but I have to work Christmas Eve." I stood and he followed suit, running his arms back through the sleeves of his coat. I brought him to the door.

"Thank you, Naoki. Hopefully, I will see you there."

I was finally able to lock up the door and switch the sign from open to closed. In back, I hung my apron and put on my coat. I left through the kitchen door and locked it after me.

The snow was coming to a temporary end. Because of this, I decided I could make a stop at the bookstore before going home.

The bookstore around the corner from Teppan was all but deserted except for myself and one elderly man browsing the cook books. I directed myself to the medical books section. It was about time I bought my own and stopped renting from the library.

Here, I found a wider variety of books to choose from. I picked two titles out from the books I hadn't yet read and bought them, the sooner to be home and out of the cold.

Once in my apartment, I placed the books on my bookshelf, not delving in right away with the idea of sleep in mind.

I fell directly into my pillow.

In a sweep of reluctance to do so, I took step into my parents' house. The first thing I could see my mother doing was asking about the party. While I had asked my boss for the day off and he had agreed, once I told my mother, she would assume that I was indeed going to take over Pandai. But it was just my luck that I'd left my only suit here when I left.

But at least there would be one person there who already knew I had no intention of doing that.

"Is dad home early?" I heard Yuuki say in the living room.

I took off my shoes in the entrance and came around the corner to find the living room adorned with the many Christmas decorations my mother dragged out and dusted off at around this time every year. She and Kotoko stood hanging ornaments all over the tree in the corner of the room.

"Irie-kun, why are you here?" Kotoko said, dropping a red bulb on the floor.

"Is there something wrong with me coming home for a visit?" I sat in the chair beside Yuuki's.

"It's just been so long since you were last here. What are you here for?"

"Just a visit." I said.

"You never tell much," My mother said, "Your father stopped by last night and asked you about the Christmas party, right?" Straight to the point, she was. I didn't answer her. Kotoko started anyway.

"I'm so excited for Christmas Eve! This year, Satomi and Jinko and I are going to have a party. They said that they're going to bring cake and fried chicken." She said.

"That does sound fun. I remember when me and my friends used to do things like that around the holidays! Just beware, because girlfriends like to ditch last second for their boyfriends." My mother squinted her eyes at me, "If only Naoki was going to the party, you could ditch yourself and come to Pandai's party." This was so like her. I wanted to tell her even less, if that was possible.

"Oh, no, I can't do that. We made a promise."

"Anyway… what _are_ you here for, Naoki?" My mother asked, her eyes wide with expectation.

"Dad asked me last night if I would go to the party and I told him I would think about it. I've decided to go, so now I'm here for my suit." I said plainly. My mother crossed her arms and smiled.

"Oh, are you now?"

"I'm only showing my face. This doesn't mean I'm taking over the company."

Yuuki howled with excitement, "Yay!"

"Your father is going to be so happy."

 _I bet he will be…_

"Kotoko, it's too bad you can't get out of that party with your friends." My mother said, to which Kotoko bit her lip. As much better as the party would have been, she did have plans and was excited about them.

"Um… well, I _could_." She said.

"But I thought you couldn't cancel with your friends." I said.

"Right."

I thought about whether or not I should say it, then I threw the fact that my mother was in the room out the metaphorical window, "It's too bad. It would be so much fun with you there." I glanced away from her and my mother to ignore any looks I might've gotten.

"Oh, Naoki! You should convince her to come." There my mother was, at it again. Only, now that I'd said that, I supposed she thought she had a reason.

"She's made plans already. There's nothing I can do about it," I started toward the stairs, "The suit is still in my old bedroom, right?"

"Yes, it is."

I got the suit and came down the stairs to hear Kotoko humming as she decorated the tree. I popped back in.

"I should be going now. See you later."

" _See you!_ " Kotoko singsonged.

I put my shoes on at the door, laughing lightly at how elated she was simply to be putting up Christmas decorations. It really was too bad she wasn't going. Maybe I wouldn't have been dreading it so wholly if she was. And it was too bad she didn't actually know that.


	42. Chapter 42

**Chapter Forty-Two**

I arrived at the party a little past seven. The place was bursting at the seams with well-dressed people and businessmen. My father found me and got right down to business.

"Naoki, good thing you're here. There was someone I wanted you to meet." I hid my displeasure at not having been here a minute before being introduced to someone.

Still, my father led me across the grand hall and into a conversation with a man he worked with.

"This is my son, Naoki. Naoki, this is Iwasaki Shigeki. He is the second in command at Pandai." I shook hands with the man.

"Very nice to meet you, young man. You know, I have a daughter about your age." He smirked.

And then there was that. Another reason I'd been so hesitant to come to this party. Being that I was supposed to be the successor of Pandai, I was going to have people on my case about their daughters. I wouldn't have been chummy with the idea even if I wasn't interested in someone already.

I went for a drink, even if only to get away from this topic of conversation. I could see it going something like _"You two should meet sometime"_ or _"I think you would get along"_. But if my father knew anything about me, he knew that I wasn't about to let anyone decide _that_ for me.

My father returned to me.

"What are you thinking of the party so far?" He asked. Supposing he already knew the answer, he went on, "I have someone else I'd like for you to meet."

Again, I let him tote me along to meet someone I would probably never meet again since _I was not going to be running this company_.

"Fukui, this is my son, Naoki."

"Hello, I'm Fukui Nanami. I have heard a lot about you." She said, holding out her hand. I shook it and nodded along with the rest of the mind-numbing conversation. I took another sip of my drink and tried to find something less dull about this whole party.

I failed in doing so.

Every person in this place, no matter where I looked, it seemed they were dragging on about Pandai or the weather or how someone in the family was getting married next Saturday. The conversations were about as stale as the champagne they drank.

For what felt like hours, my father showed me around and had me greet many people. It was when he left me for the bathroom that I checked my watch. Only seven forty-five.

My resolve came to a screeching halt and I firmly decided I couldn't do this for two more hours. I made my way to the exit without a doubt in my mind about it. If my father was mad, so be it. He'd only been putting me on display like a show pony as it was.

For once, I was happy to be greeted by the cold, offensive wind. It woke me up as I started down the sidewalk to the train station.

There were carolers I passed on the way, but one in particular caught my attention. He was not a caroler, singing rather about love. It was not him that was anything special, but the girl accompanying him. She was annoyingly familiar as she praised his singing voice and clapped along. It was one of Kotoko's Class F friends… Jinko. I took an extra moment to make sure it was her before I made the assumption that Kotoko's friends had ditched her.

No, it was just this one friend. There was no way she'd been ditched by the both of them. What my mother said sprang to the very front of my mind. "You can't trust girlfriends" she'd said. And rightfully so, as I could see.

If Kotoko had been cancelled on, that meant she was home, devoted to the plans she'd made with her friends but alone. Then there was the food they were supposed to bring with them, which meant that not only was Kotoko spending Christmas Eve alone, but she didn't have anything to eat either.

 _What faithful friends._

I thought about what I could do and one idea stuck out. I could get some food and go to the house with it. If her other friend was there, then good. If she wasn't, then at least there was something for Kotoko to eat.

I took the train, figuring to buy fried chicken and a cake when I was closer to home. That it was not snowing helped in many ways as I made my way around, getting the food. A bucket of chicken from the grocery store. With them out of cakes, I made a second trip to a convenience store a block down. They had the smallest of cakes, but it would do just fine.

I placed the food in a plastic bag and lugged it back to the house from there, which wasn't far at this point.

At the front door, I listened for talking and found nothing but silence. So, her other friend had ditched her too. I shook my head and dug around in my bag for my keys.

I found them and shoved the key into the lock. I tried turning but something was wrong. I jiggled the doorknob to free my key and tried again.

I understood after a moment. I was so used to using my apartment key that I'd forgotten. I slid the correct key forward and successfully unlocked the door. I stepped into a dark entrance. There was no sign that even one person was home.

I set the bag of food down on the end table in the entrance and went to the living room to look around. No one was here. The walls were decorated with streamers and such to accommodate the party she was supposed to be having with her friends.

I was knocked in the head unexpectedly. A hard object clipped my forehead.

" _Thief!_ " Kotoko wailed on me with her tennis racket, " _Thief!_ " She hit me in the head again. This time, the metal of the racket more than clipped me.

"Ouch! What are you doing?" I held the racket back. She finally got a good look at me through the dark and her mouth fell open.

"Irie-kun! Sorry… are you okay?" She gazed at me for a moment, and then she started to laugh.

"What is it now?"

"You're dressed in a suit, but I thought you were a thief and hit you on the head," she laughed harder, " _and_ it's in your own home!"

"You're the one that hit me!" I said. She was engulfed in a hard laughter.

"I'm sorry." She continued on her little rampage of giggles.

Such a silly, simple girl.

I took off my coat and we went from the entrance hallway to the living room. I sat opposite her. Her laughter blew over.

"I'm sorry. I heard the doorknob rattling and thought you were a thief." She said.

"I was trying to use my apartment key."

"Oh…"

"Jeez, you hit me pretty hard." There was going to be a bruise. It would be hidden under my hair, but there was definitely going to be one.

"Oh, by the way, what about your father's party? You didn't go?"

"I did, but I left early. I was only getting introduced to people. It was so boring. My father has to be furious now," I said, "What about your party? I thought your friends were supposed to be coming over."

"Well," She giggled nervously, "Jinko and Satomi both had plans with their boyfriends out of nowhere."

"I see. Your friendships are pretty firm, huh?" I sat back, crossing my arms.

"Oh, don't say it like that." She frowned at the floor and then looked over to me, "Do you smell something?"

I got up and took the bucket of chicken out of the bag, "You mean this?" I brought it to the living room and sat it on the coffee table.

"Fried chicken!" Her face lit up with a smile.

"It was a buffet party, but I wasn't able to eat much. So I picked this up." I said. She eyed it longingly.

"I only ate a bowl of instant noodles, myself."

I slid the bucket closer to her, "Just have some."

"Really?" She reached to open it, "Thank you!" She dove right into it. Kotoko ate without speaking for a solid ten minutes. Then she stopped.

"Oh," she said, "I almost forgot." She hopped over to the lightswitch and dimmed them before turning on the Christmas tree lights.

"I prepared this for Jinko and Satomi," Kotoko said. So much effort put in for her friends to not even have shown, "It's really almost Christmas now. I think it's the first time since I can remember that I'm actually spending Christmas Eve with someone." I listened without interruption.

"My mom passed away when I was small, and my dad always works on Christmas Eve." It had to have been one of the saddest things I'd heard her say. But she didn't seem very unhappy. In fact, she looked at peace.

She stood suddenly, "I am going to go get a cake. This is such a good Christmas, there should be cake. I think I can get one at a convenience store."

"Wait, hold on," I said. She held, "There's a cake."

"There is?"

I led her back into the entrance hall where the cake still stood in place on the end table.

"Really? But why?" She gave me an amazed look, like I was some kind of genie, "Is it from Santa?"

"Don't be ridiculous."

"Then is it from you?" She gave one of those completely deluded expressions (although, this time, maybe she wasn't so deluded), and said, "Is it possible you knew I was home alone and bought this for me?"

Almost caught, I said, "Of course not. How would I have known that? My coworker couldn't get off work until she sold the last one, so I took it."

She brought it into the living room and sat it up on the coffee table.

"Wait a minute, I know what we need." Kotoko said and bolted to the kitchen. A couple of minutes later, she returned with two candles and a lighter. She shoved the candles into the top of the cake and lit them. I sat beside her.

"There. Now, make a wish." She said.

"That's only for birthday cakes." I pointed out.

"Huh? Really?" Kotoko admired the cake, "Thank you, Irie-kun."

Again with that…

"It wasn't for you." I insisted.

"But the cake is the size for two people." She said, questioning me. I hoped she wasn't starting to catch on now.

"Coincidence." I looked away from her, refusing to be caught at all.

"Hey, you should make a wish anyway. It's not like it'll hurt anything." She smiled up at me and I softened at the very sight of it.

"Why don't you make one?" She smiled wider.

"Can I?" I nodded and she closed her eyes. I studied her wishful, happy face and couldn't help but know what she was wishing for.

Kotoko opened her eyes and blew out the candles. What she didn't know was that at that exact moment, I made a wish too.


	43. Chapter 43

**Chapter Forty-Three**

Winter ended early after the new year came. With my second year of college approaching, I was faced with a decision to make… whether or not I was switching to the medical department. For me, the choice was clear. The only problem presented to me was telling my parents and getting them to approve. My father would be disappointed I wasn't going to take over his company, but I was sure he'd allow for the switch. My mother, on the other hand…

I continued on my way, studying the medical books in the library and being undisturbed. That was until I was found.

"Irie-kun," Yuuko said, wandering up to where I sat, my studies fully exposed, "I never expected to see you studying." She ran her eyes over the open books, "Are you preparing for a second language class or something?" Then it struck her, "This is a medical textbook!" She looked to me for answers.

I nodded my head.

"But why?" She was scandalized.

"I've just been thinking about a change." I said, keeping my voice low for the sake of everyone else studying.

"But to the medical field? What brought that on? I mean, that's not bad, but it's so drastic."

"I don't know." I said. She stared at me. Clearly, there was a reason I wasn't telling her, but she let it slide and moved on. I was left to study.

Although, soon after, I closed the book and left the library to focus on one thing at a time. Because today, I was moving back home.

Everything had already been set up. I'd notified my landlord that I was moving out, I'd had my stuff packed and sent to the house, and I'd allowed my mother the privilege of rearranging the bedrooms. Now all that had to be brought there was me.

When I got to the house, it seemed like I'd never left. Kotoko grinned at me upon my arrival. I slipped my shoes off. She leaned against the living room door frame, saying nothing, just watching. I glanced at her and then away. She shrunk away into the living room when I went upstairs.

The rooms were back in order, but my suitcases and boxes had yet to be unpacked. I got working on those, concealing a few questionable things in my inventory.

First, the medical books no one knew I was studying from. Well, except for Yuuko now. Second, there were pictures I would have rathered people didn't know I had and a certain handmade charm. I kept looking over my shoulder to be sure I was alone as I stashed these in a desk drawer. Though Yuuki already knew about Kotoko, it was strange.

I piled my clothes into my dresser and closet and the rest of my books back onto the shelves of their origin. When finished, I piled the boxes off to the side and came downstairs for supper.

Since Kotoko had officially passed the first year of college and would be able to enter the second, there was a sort of feast. The table was littered with many different plates of food, some of it appearing to have been cooked by her father. On the wall hung a congratulatory sign.

Everyone sat down to eat. I took the seat beside Kotoko, Yuuki giving me a look over this.

My mother broke out some champaign and filled five glasses, Yuuki only getting apple juice.

"Kotoko, Naoki," My father said, "Congratulations on passing your first year of college."

"Thanks." I said and took a sip.

Kotoko brightened at the mention, "Thank you so much!"

"It's no problem," he went on, filling his plate, "And not only you two, but Yuuki is going into junior high after next year. The studying to get in there will be rigorous."

"I'm going to go to Tonan and be the top student there just like onii-chan." I was sure he would be, too. The kid was smart. Very much so.

"No doubt." I said.

"Mama, these sushi balls are delicious, as always."

"Thanks, honey."

Kotoko studied the plates, "The shapes of the daikon radishes are so pretty."

My mother peered over, "Naoki, you should eat more." She reached over and piled more food onto my plate.

I stopped her, "I can't eat that much."

"Oh, but I'm worried about if you got enough vitamins when you were living alone." She backed off rather easily. Maybe it wouldn't be as hard to live with her as it had been.

Kotoko leaned in close and said, "I think she's just happy you're home." To be honest, I was too… but for a different reason.

It was peaceful as we ate, save for my mother wanting to shove food down my throat, and I relaxed when I was done. This was normal. It felt nice to be back.

Kotoko leaned back when she finished up. She sighed, "It was so good. I'm stuffed."

"You're going to get fat if you eat like that." Yuuki said. If it hadn't been months since last seeing this, I wouldn't have laughed.

"Hey, you were eating a lot, too." She said.

"I'm okay, because I'm growing. It's not like your breasts will get bigger or something." Kotoko's mouth fell open, and then she snorted a laugh.

"You little…" She threw an air punch at him and he dodged it, suiting up, himself. The two had a fake fight. Yuuki seemed to enjoy himself. I started to wonder what was making him be so much nicer to her. Although he still threw insults, it must have been habit, since he looked much… more willing to be around her.

 _Oh_. I thought.

Yuuki followed my every move. Of course he was alright with her _now_.

I chuckled at their fake fight. Then my mother moved on to a more sensitive conversation topic for me.

"It's so nice when family gets along," She said, "You know, I still have hope for Naoki and Kotoko one day." She grinned wickedly. She couldn't wait one night to get started back on one of the reasons I'd moved out in the first place. It wiped the smile from my face.

"One day, I hope they can get married and then we'll all be a real family."

"Have you had too much to drink?" I asked, though knowing that wasn't the case.

"No, that's not it."

"The food was great. I'm going upstairs now." I stood, deciding to leave before I could become any more piqued.

"Wait, Naoki," My father said, "There's something I'd like to talk to you about." He also left his chair. Leading me toward his study, he called for my mother to come along as well. This couldn't have been a nice conversation we were about to have.

Finally, we sat alone in my father's study.

"What is it?" I said.

"Naoki, I would like to know what your thoughts are on the future. Tell me what you are really thinking." My father said. Oh, so it was that talk, was it? He had to have known by now that I wasn't interested in Pandai. And I didn't think right now was the time to break the news about a change to the medical department. That would be a talk I wanted to have with my father alone first.

"You must already know this, but I am thinking about announcing you as Pandai's official successor. I want you to start working at the company after graduating."

I was absolutely still, silent. There was no budge in my mindset for wanting to switch to the medical department. But having them both here, I felt outnumbered, and I couldn't say a word.

"I am in favor of that idea." My mother said. My jaw clenched and I shot her a perturbed eye.

 _You would be in favor of that idea._

"It's better to learn about the work early, so you can get a handle on it. Using long holidays, like summer vacation, I'm thinking you could learn more about how Pandai functions." My father went on, "And I want to hear your opinion about the management there. What do you think, Naoki?"

I unclenched my jaw and tried to back out of the corner I was in. My father eagerly awaited my acceptance.

"I don't know whether or not I want to take over Pandai right now. I need some time to think about it." I said, although still feeling heavily cornered.

"You've had enough time to think about it," My mother cut in, but she was the last person I wanted to be hearing this from right now, "... About your father's company, and about Kotoko." I balled my fists. So, this was going there, too? Not only could they let me choose a career, but who to love. What angered me even more about the mention was that I essentially already had made up my mind about it… and I'd agreed with my mother whether she knew it or not.

My fingernails cut into my palm.

"Let's not talk about Kotoko right now, okay?" My father said.

"But this is also important for his future," She argued, "I didn't choose her randomly. The two would be perfect together."

I fought the urge to leave without saying a word more.

"If you take over Pandai, I think Kotoko would be your ideal wife."

My father pressed forward, not commenting, thankfully, "It certainly takes a great amount of work to run a company…" and then I was proven wrong, "You'll need someone who will love and support you. Maybe it's not just about marrying someone you love. In that sense, I think Kotoko would be ideal, as well."

The nerve of them to let this conversation take this kind of turn. I was furious. What, so even if I _didn't_ love Kotoko, they would want to force me to marry her? I couldn't only be unhappy with my job, but also with my wife.

"But what is most important is your feelings about it."

 _You're contradicting what you just said._

"Tell us what you are thinking."

I would have, but it would have given my mother too much satisfaction and too little at the same time. That I already loved Kotoko, but that she made me not want to, and that I did not, in any way, shape, or form, need to think about whether or not to take Pandai out of my father's hands. I already knew I didn't want to.

Even if they knew my deepest secrets, however, I also knew that it wouldn't be enough for the pair of them. They didn't want to hear what I was thinking. They wanted to hear me agree with them. That had to have been the reason my father let my mother in on this conversation. She had to be there for me to not object immediately, for me to tell him what he desired to hear.

"What do I think? I think you're both forcing everything to go the way you want it to. I don't think you want to hear what I have to say at all." I snapped. I was through with this. Tonight was going to be the last night I was doing this with them.

"You're making it look like I have a choice, when in actuality, I don't. It has already been decided for me, hasn't it?" I let it spill… everything I'd been longing to say for some time now, "You're playing dirty."

"How could you say such an awful thing to your father?!" My mother was shocked, outraged, "Your father cares about you…"

"No, he is only worried about his company." I said, getting louder.

"That's not…"

"You too! Just because you like Kotoko, you try to force us together, completely ignoring my feelings about it." I spat. My head was spinning. I had never disrespected my parents in such a way.

"I explained that to you! There are reasons I think you make a good couple!" She held her heart, like it might give way.

"That's enough! I can't choose my job _or_ who I love," I went to the door before my head popped, "This was why I left this house. I can't stand staying here where I get tied down." My pulse raced, anger overcoming me.

My mother threw her hands down. She stood in double the speed and slapped me across the face so hard you'd have thought I'd told her I hated her guts.

My father took hold of her, "Calm down!"

I blew out the door, almost running into a petrified Kotoko who stood just outside of it with a tray of tea. I stopped.

"I-I'm sorry," she stuttered, "I was just…" I burrowed past her, down the stairs, and out the front door so fast, it was a blur.

It was cold outside, but with my blood boiling, it felt alright. I took off to take a walk. Maybe I should have picked a different day to come home.

"Irie-kun!" I heard Kotoko shout, "You forgot your coat!" She ran it out to me, concern taking a hit at her expression.

"Thanks." I took it from her and didn't slow.

"Wait, where are you going?"

"For a walk."

She took off after me, "I'll come with."

"You don't have to do that. Just go back inside. You don't even have your coat." I said, my thoughts still jumbled.

"No, I want to make sure you're okay." I had no argument to offer her, as it had all been left with my parents.

For about ten minutes, she walked at my side, completely silent. I cooled down and the wind started nipping at me, so I finally put on my coat (though feeling bad she didn't have hers).

In this quiet, I wondered if she'd misinterpreted anything I'd said in there or heard anything I wished she hadn't. I wondered if she still thought I didn't like her company, and it was confirmed through the things I'd said.

"I'm sorry you had to hear that." I said, "Our fight. It was ugly."

"It's alright. I feel like I was eavesdropping," she said, "I think your mother just lost her temper. You don't usually say much. That you did shocked her. But your parents care about you a lot, you know." She rubbed her hands together.

"But I know how you feel about it, too. You only have one life. You should be able to do what you want with it."

 _That's right_ , I thought, _And I shouldn't have to feel like I want to change my mind about you just because of them._

"You told me once that you go to college to find out what you want to do." I said.

Kotoko nodded, "Right, I did."

"Have you figured it out yet?"

"Sadly, no. Jinko, Satomi, Kin-chan… they've all got it figured out. I'm way behind them."

We kept walking, and she kept talking, "Kin-chan told me that when I find something I want to do, I'll know it without thinking. He said it's like falling in love with someone. But I'm so nervous about finding what I want to do."

"That's right," I said, understanding that sudden realization of knowing what you want, "That's why I think you're amazing."

We came to a park.

"If my father told me to take over his restaurant, I would listen to him. But you didn't listen to your father… and I don't think you should listen to them. You should be able to choose your job, and who you love." She sounded sad when she said that last part. So, maybe she had heard some things I would have preferred her not to.

"You shouldn't be with someone just because everyone tells you to. I hope you can find someone and be happy."

I cursed at myself internally. Assumptions… it was all assumptions.

"I…" I stopped myself, replacing it with something else, "I want to become a doctor."

Kotoko's eyes rounded, "What?"

"I was thinking about making the switch next semester. I'm not sure if it's right or not, but I've been studying it for a bit now. It's the first job that has interested me in my life."

"Why didn't you tell that to your father?"

"Until a little while ago, I wasn't sure about it. Plus, my mother was there and she's always had influence on my father." I said.

"A little while ago? When did you decide it then?" She asked, but that was something I couldn't answer.

"While we were taking this walk." I said, since what she'd said had convinced me even more so.

We crossed a deserted road.

"I don't want to tell this to my parents. Not yet, anyway."

"Why? It would get them straight off your case since you've decided."

"I want to prepare and take concrete action first. So, don't tell anyone. Okay, Kotoko?" I said. She hadn't been known to keep secrets in the past, but I didn't think this one would slip.

"Okay."

We found other people on the sidewalk, making our way toward town.

"Why did you tell me something so important, though?" I, myself, had been thinking about this. Why did I keep telling her everything? Things I didn't tell to anyone else? I'd never been like that before.

"I don't even know."

She shivered for the hundredth time. I stopped walking and turned to her.

"You're cold. Listen, just go back home. I'll be there in a while." I said.

"But are you sure you're okay? You don't need to talk more?" I shook my head.

"No, I don't. Get home safe." She fell behind and turned around. I continued my walk without her.

Everything was tranquil until I got the call.


	44. Chapter 44

**Chapter Forty-Four**

My mother and I came out of the room to greet my brother, Kotoko, and her father. I was stunned. I couldn't believe my father had kept this kind of secret.

Heart problems.

Overworking and stress had been taking a larger toll on him than he'd let anyone know. Stress over running a company that was slowly sinking and trying to get me in on it when I was unwilling. And last night, when I'd left, he'd had an attack and it was because of me. I knew I'd said some harsh things, but I never would have if I'd known it would result in this.

In the time of rushing to the hospital and learning this news from the doctor and seeing my father being wheeled away, I wondered if it was brought on by me insistently saying that I didn't want to go to college over a year ago. Of course, it wouldn't have been the only reason, but it would have been one of them, and a major one at that. I was the cause of his problems.

For that, I owed him.

Kotoko stopped pacing and her father stood, "How is he?" He asked.

"He's had a heart problem for some time now without telling anyone. I think he's been pushing himself too hard up until now." My mother said. Worry had worked its way across her wrinkled brow.

"He's on bed rest for a while to heal." I said.

"He'll be okay if he's on bed rest, right?" Kotoko's father asked.

"Yes, that's what they say," My mother answered, "He was suffering so much. He didn't have to go through that alone. I don't know what made him think he had to." She had turned to choking up. My mother's voice was strained through holding back tears.

"It's okay, Mrs. Irie, this wasn't a life-threatening situation. I'm sure he'll heal right up." Mr. Aihara said. I, on the other hand, wasn't so sure he would heal completely unless I was burdened with Pandai. I hated the thought of running that company, couldn't find any enjoyment in it. But I would do what I had to for my father, and especially since I'd caused his attack. I would take absolute responsibility for it.

"What about dad's company?" Yuuki said, "What is going to happen if he takes so many days off?"

This was the part where I stopped rebelling against my parents and doing what I wanted. Now I had no choice, "I'll do it."

Kotoko let out a small gasp. What she must've been thinking, I didn't want to know. I only hoped she wouldn't try to talk me out of this choice, for that would have made it even harder to choose Pandai. This was something I couldn't back down from for the sake of my father's health.

"But Naoki…" My mother, of all people, said, "You said you weren't sure if you wanted to take it over."

"I think he was trying to make me his successor quickly because of this heart problem. I might have caused a lot of his stress. Because of that, I'll save Pandai."

My mother gave a slight smile, "Thank you, Naoki. Thank you."

Kotoko gave me the opposite of that. She was fit with a sad look, one that said she knew I didn't want this for myself.

Hours more was spent at the hospital. Everyone stayed until my father came to. Limited to two visitors at a time for now, my mother and I went in and everyone else went home, Mr. Aihara going for his restaurant.

The room was dim and the sun was starting to set. I wasn't going to stay long, but I had to know he was okay and let him know that he didn't have to worry about Pandai anymore.

My mother scooted her chair up close to his bed and took hold of his hand, frowning at him.

"You didn't have to keep it a secret," She said, "We would have helped you."

"Oh, honey," My father breathed, "You didn't need to have it worrying you. Or, you, Naoki. I wanted you to take the company because _you_ wanted to, not because I'm a little sick."

" _A little!_ "

"Calm down, Noriko."

"You are in the hospital with heart problems. That is not "a little sick"." Her frown deepened.

"I'm sorry I made you worry." My father squeezed her hand back.

He looked to me, "Now, Naoki, we have something to discuss…"

"I'll take over Pandai. I'll be taking leave from college to work there, at least until you get better." I tacked on that last part to make him feel less guilty. In fact, there was nothing for him to feel guilty over. But I knew for a fact that I would continue to work at Pandai even after his recovery. If I started working there now, it was a black hole of no escape. There was no getting out of it after this, as I was so fully aware.

"Thank you. You don't know how much that means." He smiled weakly.

"I should go now. If I'm taking leave, I have to get up tomorrow and go to Tonan." I put on my coat and my father nodded.

"Naoki," My mother started, "I'll be spending a lot of time here with your father until he's released, so you three kids should split chores. Kotoko has cooking duties, but everything else is up to you."

If I hadn't felt numb, I'd have smiled. This must've been Kotoko's dream. Cooking and pretending to be a wife. I could imagine her being happy over such a silly thing even through this awful mess with my father.

I slipped through the door and headed back home.

…

Smoke did not billow through the house this time around. She had improved, but the food was still not very well off.

The food was unrecognizable to me. As we sat down at the table, Yuuki glowered at the food and I prayed for both of our souls.

"Please have some," Kotoko grinned despite the troubles last night brought, "I made stewed taro roots, teriyaki yellowtail, miso soup, kidney beans, and…" She cocked her head at the last dish, which I recognized from almost two years ago, "I guess you can call it fried tofu."

Again, the "fried tofu" was soggy and hanging around in even more liquid. It was mush. I held out hope that the other dishes wouldn't be so bad, but I knew better than that.

Yuuki dug in, sparing me the trouble of trying it first. One spoon of miso soup later and his tongue hung out of his mouth.

" _It's hot,_ " He said through gasps, " _Too hot!_ "

"Oh no… but it can't be. I didn't think I'd put that pepper much in." Kotoko took a bite and her eyes just about popped out of her skull. Her feet drummed against the floor.

" _Eee!_ " She gulped down water.

I sighed and my mouth forming a tight line. I picked up my chopsticks, no longer caring about taste.

"Onii-chan, don't eat it," Yuuki said with watery eyes, "it really is too hot."

Kotoko took another bite, forced it down, and fanned her face. With that, I opted to try a different dish first.

This one was not so hot as it was undercooked, but I would live. I chewed on a largely undercooked piece of taro root. The noise sounded through the room.

"What was that sound?" Yuuki said.

I went on chewing, "The taro root." I said calmly.

"Taro roots aren't supposed to make that sound."

"Oh no! It's undercooked!" Kotoko was horrified.

"Onii-chan, you should spit it out…"

I forcefully swallowed it and took a drink of water. Yuuki's eyebrows raised at me, "You should stop complaining and just eat your food, Yuuki."

Kotoko gaped at me for a long second. It was, after all, the first time I'd eaten her food and not complained. But she'd taken her time to make it and tried her best so I figured we should at least eat it.

And that was exactly what we did. Yuuki complained because he was a kid. But I ate without a word. I let the spices fry my tongue, chewed the taro roots, and choked down the fried tofu. For this, I could tell that she was grateful… and as far as I was concerned, she better have been, because that food was the stuff of nightmares. I would have to brush my teeth four times to lose the taste of it.

Yuuki migrated to his bedroom when it was over, his eyes still watering over the miso soup and breathing through his mouth.

Kotoko brought the dishes to the kitchen to clean. I took a moment before joining her there, then I found her at the sink with suds all on the counter.

"Oh, hi Irie-kun." She showed me her teeth, her eyes sparkling. Seeing that one little gesture smoothed some of my frayed nerves. She stopped washing dishes.

"Do you want me to make you some coffee?"

With no reason to object, I nodded, "Sure." But I wasn't here for coffee. I was here to see what she had to say about this switch when I'd told her only last night about wanting to change to the medical department. At the hospital, she hadn't had the time or space from the others to talk to me about it. Now she did.

I leaned against the counter as she placed a kettle on the stove.

"Um…" She began, "Are you really going to take over your father's company? It's just that you said you wanted to be a doctor."

"Yes. I can't hide from it and I don't want to," She waited, listening, "It's all really sudden with my father collapsing, but I won't run away from this," I said. Kotoko half smiled, but still she seemed worried, "When he recovers, I can go back to school. It wouldn't be too late. But I think I should get into his company now."

"Ah," She pepped up, "If there is anything I can do, please let me know."

I managed a weak smile in response.

"Oh, right, the coffee!" She snapped right to it and started fixing it. Meanwhile, I couldn't tear my eyes away from her, watching her every move as she fretted about making the coffee.

As I brought my cup of coffee back to my bedroom, I wondered about her offer… if there was anything she could do. No, she probably couldn't do anything more than what was already given. Coffee, talks, and an unwavering smile. That was all I was going to need from her in these coming weeks.


	45. Chapter 45

**Chapter Forty-Five**

Flogged with files to go through and documents to read, I felt backed into a corner. Sure, it was easy for me to learn all of this information about Pandai, but that didn't make it any more interesting. However, with the obligation weighing heavily upon me, I was urged to carry on with it. For right now, all I needed to do was make sure a merger went through. Hokueisha was a successful company and had more than enough money to accommodate for the debt Pandai was in. I hadn't known until now that my father's company was in as much trouble as it was. It was no wonder his health was declining.

In the last week of my taking leave from college and learning everything I could about Pandai, I'd studied thoroughly this company we wanted to merge with. By the looks of it, they would be tough. This company didn't merge with just anybody from what I'd read.

I pulled together some files to go through at home and stuffed them into my bag. But I couldn't look forward to going home just yet since I still had to visit my father in the hospital. I'd been visiting him as often as I could squeeze in. My mother spent much more time than that with him, there at the hospital from the moment visiting hours began until they ended.

With that, practically everything was left up to Kotoko. Since I had to spend a lot of my time at Pandai, she was stuck with cleaning and cooking, though I had yet to see her seem displeased about it. In fact, she was more than willing to be doing these chores.

At the door on the way out of my father's office, Iwasaki Shigeki waited.

"On the way out, Irie?" He said. He'd had quite the trouble figuring out what to address me as, and had eventually just settled on my family name. I appreciated that those who worked with my father weren't rushing into using a formal name, accepting me as their official successor, though I knew already that the title would be mine. It was only a matter of time.

"Yes, I am. Have a nice night." I said.

"And you as well." Iwasaki nodded.

I headed off for the hospital as the sky began to darken. I wouldn't have much time to spend with my father before I should be going home to eat something less than palatable. Then I would be studying files for the rest of the night.

It was luckily still light out as I arrived. From what I could hear from outside my father's hospital room, he was not alone. And it was not my mother's voice I was hearing, but a man's.

My father went on speaking in mumbles with this man, then laughed. Judging by his suit, this man worked with my father, and that was the last thing he needed, to be talking about work.

"Dad, you should be resting." Was the first thing I said. I wasn't taking on the company just for him to keep his health on the fast track downhill.

"Naoki," he said, "This is Chairman Oizumi, the head of Hokueisha."

"I was nearby, so I decided to visit," Chairman Oizumi said, holding his hand out to me, "Pleased to meet you."

I took his hand and shook it, "Sorry for not introducing myself sooner. I am Naoki Irie."

"Irie?"

"Yes, this is my son. He's training at Pandai while I'm here." My father said.

"If that is the case, and everyone is here…" The Chairman looked me over from behind his glasses, "I should like to discuss something with you, President Irie. About the merger."

"Of course. Naoki, could you hand me those papers?" My father asked as the Chairman retrieved some documents from his briefcase.

"I don't mean to be rude, but my father needs to be resting. He's not in the condition to be working. On behalf of him, I would like to discuss the investment plan with you instead." I offered, more than capable of having this discussion with my non-stop training.

"You don't have to do that." My father argued. The Chairman eyed me, thinking about it.

"I am acting as President now. If you'd like to have this conversation, we can have it, just not in here." I said. He shoved the documents back into the briefcase.

"Excuse us," The Chairman said to my father, "I wish you a speedy recovery."

"Thank you for taking time out of your day to come here." The Chairman nodded out of the room and I followed him.

Down the hall and rounding a corner, we found an empty waiting area. He sat first and gestured to the seat beside him.

"Thank you for this opportunity." I said.

We got right down to it, discussing the financial situation Pandai was in, but how beneficial both of the companies could be to each other. I weighed in on the positive parts of Pandai and how his company could profit from ours quite considerably. He listened intently.

When I'd finished, he stared me down. He seemed to enjoy doing such.

"For merely a college student, you seem to know a rather lot about management. It was a well put-together presentation. Your teacher has done well." He said, glancing over some documents.

"Excuse me, but I'm in the science and engineering department. I taught myself management." I clarified. I doubted he knew yet just how quick of a learner I was.

"But aren't you planning on becoming Pandai's successor? Why the science and engineering department?" He looked genuinely confused. Many students who were going to take over a company went directly into management courses.

"I want to have a diverse range of knowledge. It's my belief that people with a narrow mind cannot survive in this society." I evened out some papers and slid them back into my bag.

"So, you are planning to run the company?"

I hesitated, not because I didn't know, but because I didn't like the answer, "Yes, I am." I said. And I would refuse to take back my word. I would do this for my father. I'd caused him nothing but worry up until this point, and I would do what I could to stop it. If that meant taking over the company, so be it.

Chairman Oizumi sat back in his chair, "If that is so, I would like to bring up a personal matter."

I wondered what kind of personal matter he would have to discuss with me, "Go on."

"I have a granddaughter around your age. Would you be opposed to having an arranged marriage meeting?"

I was confounded, silent. No way I would agree to that…

"She's beautiful, smart, polite, and she holds herself well. I think you two would get along." He added. Still, I was at a loss for what I should say. Of course, the answer was no. I loved someone else. But there was something tugging at the back of my mind, a harsh reality.

Marrying the Chairman's granddaughter would all but seal the deal for a merger.

It would save Pandai.

I'd already decided to keep my word, take all of this stress away from my father, and save the company, but what if the only way to do that was to have this meeting? If I turned it down, I would run the risk of possibly offending the Chairman and that was the last thing Pandai needed. As I sat without an answer, I wondered what the Chairman was thinking.

What would happen to Kotoko? I didn't want to hurt her.

Before I could go any deeper into those particular thoughts, I gave the answer I knew was best for Pandai and my father who I'd been letting down thus far.

"Absolutely," I said, my voice a little low, "I'd love to meet her." Uttering this lie caused my heart to sink. Trapped inside my head, I reminded myself of every advantage having this meeting would come with.

"Great," The Chairman grinned and scribbled something down on a piece of paper, "Call me if you have any questions. I'll be in contact to set a date once I know she's alright with it."

I took the paper and shoved it deep into my pocket. This paper, though, was as heavy as the doubt I now felt.

We stood and shook hands, and then he departed. I stood there for a short moment after he'd gone. I wasn't ready to go back to my father and probably my mother as well until I'd stomached what I'd just done.

I could sense Kotoko being hurt over this even though she didn't know yet. A marriage? Was I prepared to spend the rest of my life beside someone I didn't know, and all for monetary relief of Pandai?

It all came down to one question: My father or Kotoko? It was a question I couldn't answer. I took another moment for myself and sat down. There, I held my face in my hands and just thought.

And then a realization struck me.

 _Well_ , I thought, _She doesn't know in the first place. What harm could come of me doing what she thinks will happen eventually anyway?_

In a way, I guessed this resolved another issue. I'd wondered before if I would ever tell Kotoko how I felt, and now I wouldn't have to. I tried my hardest to convince myself that this was okay as I made it back to my father's room. But for the rest of the visit, I was not entirely there.

…

On the way home, my mind was a no-man's land of both guilt and relief. It couldn't decide if it wanted to dwell in the fact that the company would be saved, or in gut-wrenching disappointment. It would go back and forth, and sometimes a slip of hesitation would consider that I couldn't do this. I would have weighed my options except that there were none if I wanted to be positive about a merger with Hokueisha.

At the door, Kotoko rushed to my side and I was made aware of that hesitation again. How could I do that to her? I sat down to take off my shoes, my dark thoughts rearing its ugly head.

"Welcome home," She grinned at me, "You look tired. Are you okay?"

Silence.

"Irie-kun?" She sounded worried now.

"Yeah. I was just thinking about some things."

"Oh," She said, "I just finished making supper. We're having leeks. You know, leeks are supposed to make you smarter."

And then I did something that I hadn't done in a long time and that I had no control over.

"Then you should eat some." I said. Her smile disappeared and she said nothing more as she walked away. This made me even less happy.

Why did I say that? I'd thought I was past making remarks. Perhaps it was only because I was so stressed.

I felt awful, and then I had a thought. Maybe if she hated me, this would be easier. If she hated me, maybe I could hate her too.

Only, I couldn't really see that happening as the lone thing I hated was the thought of an arrangement with another girl.


	46. Chapter 46

**Chapter Forty-Six**

No one could have been as hopelessly distracted as I was when I left Pandai after another long day. Chairman Oizumi had been in contact and a date had been set. Now to tell my parents… and Kotoko. Though it wasn't likely she'd say much, telling her was going to be worse than telling my mother, who was going to have a fit of massive proportions. But I'd already decided not to let this bother me.

Outside the front entrance, I discovered that someone had been waiting for me. In light of recent events, my taking leave from college and resigning from Teppan to work full-time at Pandai, I'd scarcely seen Yuuko.

She wandered right up to me, looking plagued, "Irie-kun," she hesitated, "If you're not busy right now, there was something I wanted to talk to you about."

 _Uh-oh_.

"I don't have anywhere to be. We can talk." I said. I waited for her to begin.

"Not here. Let's go for a walk." She said and started on ahead of me. I casted my uneasiness to the side and followed her.

She didn't utter a word and seemed to be thinking pretty hard. I wondered about what she wanted. I hoped she wouldn't say what I was guessing she would.

We walked until we arrived at an empty parking lot. She slowed and turned to face me, but she didn't take her eyes off the ground for a solid ten seconds.

"I know I am being selfish." Yuuko began, her eyes baring directly into mine now, "You're going through difficult times, and you work a lot. You must be under a lot of stress. But…" She trailed off, getting lost in thought yet again.

"But what?" I said. I knew exactly where this was going. She almost didn't need to say anything more.

"I love you, Irie-kun," Yuuko took a breath and smoothed out her hair, "There, I've said it to you straight. Since I can say it straight, I want you to do the same for me. How do you feel about me? Do you feel the same way, or am I going to feel like an idiot in a moment?"

I strung together words in my head, trying to form a way for it to sound not so blunt, but still get the message across. This was going to get messy now. Rejecting her would hurt her pride, and in turn we wouldn't be as easy friends as before. There would always be that sting.

I read disappointment on her face in the time I took to think.

"Sorry," I said, "I've never thought of you as more than a friend."

Yuuko threw her arms around me, "I _really_ do love you," She sniffed, "I've never felt like this before. I can't just give up."

She hugged me for a moment longer, and then, with her face already inches from mine, she leaned toward me.

I pulled away. She was hurt and insulted.

"Sorry, but I can't kiss you." I said. Yuuko stepped back.

"Why?" She asked, "Who would you kiss, then?"

The question caught me off guard. How had this suddenly turned back onto me? I decided to do something careless.

"I've kissed Kotoko." I said. Yuuko's jaw dropped slightly. She gaped at me, clearly unsure about whether or not she should believe it.

A sharp, cold laugh escaped her, "I can't believe this. I feel so humiliated," Another of the same kind of laugh bounced off the walls of the surrounding buildings, "I hope your father recovers well, and soon." She held herself together and strode off, leaving me alone in the parking lot.

Or so I thought.

A bush rustled from the sidewalk. I held my breath, wishing it to be an animal. I walked back to the sidewalk to find a certain someone in a pink sweater crouched down on the ground, shuffling around so I wouldn't see her.

 _You better not have heard any of that…_

"Kotoko," I brought her to attention, "You can stop pretending you don't exist now… eavesdropping on me."

She stood and brushed herself off, "Sorry. You were late, so I came to look for you." She didn't seem too incredibly excited. I relaxed with the thought that maybe she'd been too far away to hear.

Before now, had she found out anything by accident, it might've been okay. But now she could never know or it might just do enough to convince me to cancel the arrangement.

I walked on, Kotoko catching up as I found a bench and sat. Maybe now would be a good time to tell her about the arranged marriage meeting.

But maybe not… No, I couldn't bring myself to do it with her looking at me like that. I wasn't ready for all that admiration to sink into a pit of despondency. I'd seen her like that before when she thought I moved in with Yuuko and it was something I wasn't looking forward to seeing again. The news would break her spirit.

"My father isn't actually doing very well," I said, "I went with my mother yesterday to listen to what the doctor had to say. He's stable right now, sure, but he is susceptible to attacks under pressure. He has a heart disease."

"He's going to be okay though, isn't he?" Kotoko asked gently.

"He should be, but he won't be going back to work for quite a while."

"Oh. I see."

"The disease is caused by stress and anxiety. Because of this depression, Pandai's performance worsened. That was why he wanted a successor right away," I found a way to start slipping it in, "Pandai is trying to prepare for a merger now. If it happens, all of the company's problems will be solved. If I take over as President, it'll solve my father's problem, too."

"But I thought your dream was to become a doctor." Kotoko gazed at me like I was fragile, her voice so soft.

I nodded, "It hasn't been very long since I've had that dream anyway." I wished she would stop looking at me with such a sad expression. It made my head swim with everything I was losing, including her.

"So, you're giving up?" Kotoko asked. The way it was phrased, it was as though she was reading my mind. And the answer to it was yes. I was giving up being a doctor, and also a second thing she didn't know about. It left me without any words. I felt myself go numb.

When I didn't answer, Kotoko swung around and hugged me from behind. She didn't ask any more questions. I let her arms cling to me. I thought about that second kiss she hadn't been awake for. It would be the last one and she didn't even know it existed.

This was it… the last of anything between us. This last hug. As I thought it, part of me hardened, diminishing, refusing to feel anything.

Her arms left me.

I had to let go now.


	47. Chapter 47

**Chapter Forty-Seven**

My mind was still, my heart steady, already having had the time to feel the choice I'd made. I let out a breath. My parents were pleasant for the moment, but that wouldn't last much longer.

Oblivious to what was going on, my mother spoke with vigor, "This Sunday, we should all have lunch here," She told my father, "I'll make your favorites and bring it in a lunch box."

"I wouldn't be able to make it." I said. I focused my attention on the hospital room window rather than my parents.

"And why not?" My mother wore a quizzical, bemused expression.

I swallowed, hesitating and taking in these last moments before it was made final, "I have a date on Sunday."

My mother gasped. She held her hand to her heart as though it might burst, "What? With who?"

"Chairman Oizumi's granddaughter."

There was more confusion from my mother, but my father had picked up on things. He stared me down, quite unhappy.

"An arranged marriage meeting?" He said, his voice betraying his disapproval, "Naoki, you don't need to do that. Pandai will fare just fine without it."

That was a lie, and my father had to have known so as well or else he was fooling himself at how bad the situation really was. Pandai needed this merger. To secure it, I needed to marry this girl I'd never even met.

My mother's face turned to utter outrage, "What's the meaning of this?" Her voice high, she stood to protest my decision.

"Wait, calm down, honey," My father said and my mother sat back down, "Naoki, if you're doing this for financial support, then I'll tell you to cancel it right now. Don't you underestimate us. We don't want you sacrificing everything you want for the sake of my company."

"That's right!" My mother put in, "Marriage? I won't allow it!"

I stayed quiet. It was too late for that, and I wasn't seeking approval.

"You should marry for love." My father said. But the date was set, and love held no meaning in the reasons I was going through with this.

To make my parents feel better, I came up with a lie, "I like her. The Chairman told me about her and she seems like my type. I'm not doing this just for Pandai." I said, but even to me, my voice sounded tired, overworked, bland.

The door flew open and chills raked up my spine, chills of regret.

"You can't be serious!" Yuuki protested, "You can't be getting married. I thought you…"

I turned in my chair, fixing Yuuki with a warning glance, relaying to him that he wasn't to say a word. And in turning, I found that two other people also stood in the doorway. Mr. Aihara and Kotoko.

She looked at me with a glazed-over expression, her face blank, but her eyes sad. This wasn't the way I'd wanted to tell her, but I supposed that it didn't matter how I broke the news because she would still be crestfallen no matter the way I phrased it.

For a moment, you could have heard a pin drop in the room.

"Irie-kun…" At the sound of her saying my name, my breath hitched in my throat, "Are you really having an arranged marriage meeting?" Her tone was almost that of a whisper, but only just broke the barrier to be heard.

I hesitated again, hating the words that would come from my mouth next, "Yes. This coming Sunday."

Kotoko stared into outer space blankly. It was this expression that pained me, this hopelessness I was sure she felt. I didn't want to be around for the reaction and, shoving away any sorrow I felt for doing this to her, I stood to leave.

"Mom, I'll need you to come with me this Sunday." I didn't wait for an answer, escaping the confines of Kotoko's upset and my mother's scrutiny.

As I walked by her through the door, I noticed her watery eyes. Tears didn't spill, but they were present. If we were alone, I might've said "sorry" for all the torment I'd put her through until now and all of which she would have to endure as I married someone else. With all eyes on me, I was without the option and I left behind me a silent room.

The not-so-silent streets outside the hospital helped to distract from the emptiness I felt. Never in my life had I stared into the face of such sheer quiet in my head. My thoughts were still, my brain weary from all of the stress that had been handed down to me, forcing me to give up only the things that mattered to me.

So instead, my brain filled with the sounds of the cars and people riding their bikes and talking, to make up for that absolute stillness.

On the walk home, there was a lacking of any emotion to feel, as I refused to give in to the weight of my decisions. My father may have claimed that I had the choice. I could marry for love. But the truth was, in order to make it up to him, there _was_ no choice.

I found no solace in the hush of my empty home. In my bedroom, I took to studying charts to fill my head. I already knew these charts by memory, but going over them again was better than being alone in my desolate brain where I might find the thoughts that had wandered away from me in the last day.

I finished looking at the charts in no time and, after that, I had nothing to do. Unfortunately, those thoughts that had wandered away _did_ find their way back. Even if only for a moment, I felt that true, lingering dread of what was coming. I had but a shred of hope that the Chairman's granddaughter would change her mind, but it was foundationless.

My mind was vacant again when that second escaped me.


	48. Chapter 48

**Chapter Forty-Eight**

Over the course of the next five days as Sunday approached, I was faced with my mother's objections. These objections ranged from not speaking to me at all, to being overbearingly outright with her thoughts. My blank mind had remained intact. Kotoko was scarcely seen and even she hadn't been saying much to me.

And although my mother was totally against it, she stood alongside me in the elevator of a fancy garden reserve building, on the way to meet a girl who was "my type".

On the fourth floor, a man waited outside the elevator doors to escort us to the room.

"Naoki Irie?" He asked.

"Yes."

"This way please." He walked on ahead of us in the lead.

"Of course." My mother said. The impish grin spread across her face was befitting of her and I could imagine she had something up her sleeve.

We came to a spacious room with large windows and a single table with four chairs surrounding it. The man that had led us here left and Chairman Oizumi stood from the chair he occupied.

"Naoki, Mrs. Irie… I've been waiting for you." He said.

"Sorry for making you wait." My mother said, the grin never leaving.

"Please sit. My granddaughter should be here in a moment," The Chairman said as my mother and I both took places at the table, "Sorry for doing this with President Irie still in the hospital. We shall do a formal meeting with the parents when he is better."

Not even with the mention of this did my mother's eerie grin falter, "Oh, but I wonder if that day will ever come." She said with a slight giggle. I could see what she was doing now. She wanted to seem like a nightmare so the Chairman didn't want his granddaughter involved with us.

"Mom…" I warned in a low whisper. She answered with a quick glance my way and a look that said 'try to stop me'. She couldn't just make this easy, could she? She had to make this harder on me.

I felt a sharp chill in the back of my mind for a mere second, reminding me of everything I was giving up, just as it had been doing every so often for the last week. And just as I had, every time this happened in the last week, I pretended I hadn't felt it.

"I'm sure my father will look forward to it." I said. My mother shot me another glance, this one more piqued than the last.

The door opened and I turned my attention to an attractive girl in a pink kimono.

"Sorry I'm late." She said in a soft voice. Right away I could tell that she was polar opposites with Kotoko.

"There you are," The Chairman said, "Come sit." He gestured to the chair beside his own, "This is my granddaughter, Sohoko."

"Nice to meet you." Sahoko bowed and sat beside Chairman Oizumi.

"This is Naoki Irie and his mother." The Chairman introduced.

Although everything seemed generally friendly, my mother's eyes had narrowed to slits, obviously threatened. Sahoko didn't appear to have picked up on this, though.

Before my mother could rail on this girl, I began, "So, Sahoko-san, what are your hobbies?"

"Nothing special. Just cooking, sewing, and crafting," She said quietly, "Very boring, ordinary things."

My mother took her opportunity, "Indeed they are. Boring." She pursed her lips and looked through Sahoko. I grinded my teeth.

"If you couldn't already tell, Sahoko is quiet. A perfect lady, like a modern version of an old traditional Japanese woman." The Chairman boasted. Sahoko's cheeks reddened.

"I like quiet women." I said before my mind could think to oppose it.

"An old Japanese woman! I was wondering what you reminded me of," My mother went on, "No wonder you seem like you're wasting your youth away." She sniggered.

The room silenced, as no one had anything to say to that remark. Awkwardly, Sahoko restarted conversation, "Um… what do _you_ like to do, Naoki-san?"

"I play tennis and read books." I answered.

"That's right," The Chairman said, "I heard you've won many tennis competitions."

"That's amazing!" Sahoko maintained a dull smile.

"I can teach you sometime if you'd like." I offered, attempting to try to be interested in her. But the truth was exactly as my mother had spoken it. Sahoko was boring. Or maybe not _boring_ , but certainly not very lively either.

Briefly, a voice called out in my head to leave this meeting without another word. Quit it and find another way to secure the merger. I hushed it.

"I'd love to. But I've never played before, so I'm probably really bad at it. You'd get fed up with me." Sahoko said. Of all things to choose to say, my mother would have the best time with this one.

"Of course he would..." My mother said in a gossipy way, her brows lifted wickedly.

" _Mom_ …"

"Naoki is very mean, actually. He looks down on people who can't get something right after teaching it to them the first time."

Memories flooded in, and I held them at bay. But while my mother was partially right, I was hardly as bad about it now as I had been before Kotoko.

My mother smirked.

Chairman Oizumi went onto a different subject, one that was possibly worse than the one before it, "Naoki, you excel in academics and sports and you're quite a good looking young man. Surely you are popular with women?"

 _Mom, please don't…_

"Not really." I lied again. This was something I'd found myself doing so often lately that lies could just slide off my tongue without thinking about it anymore.

"Oh, Naoki is popular. But no need to worry about it. He's not very fond of relationships. He even rejected a love letter once. It took all her courage and he turned her down in front of everyone." My mother tittered.

 _You know what?_ I thought, _Do your worst._ Whatever reluctant thoughts I'd been avoiding resurfaced. Maybe just this once, my mother could actually do me a favor, and get me out of this. Then at least I could say I'd tried.

I wasn't prepared for Sahoko's response.

"But that's better than a man who pretends to be nice. I think cold men are a little more attractive." Sahoko said, and I could tell she was sincere. I drowned out my reluctance once more.

The Chairman laughed, "And it means you'd never have to worry about cheating."

"But that doesn't mean he never has girls around," My mother made sure to add, "He's lived in the same house with a girl his age for three years now."

"That's enough." I snapped at her.

"And I can't guarantee that nothing has happened between them." My mother's manic laugh was enough to send me through the door. But not alone. I was content with trying to like Sahoko. I owed my father as much.

"Sahoko-san, would you like to come outside with me? It might be easier to talk if we're alone." I said, already on my feet.

"Right. We'll let you two be alone." The Chairman said. My mother reluctantly backed down and Sahoko and I were left to our own devices. We used the elevator to the first floor and found the sliding glass doors to the massive garden outside.

I gave her the benefit of the doubt, that perhaps she was so shy because she was around so many people, and began with, "I'm sorry my mother was so rude to you." We came to the winding garden path.

"It's okay. I can tell your mother likes her… the woman who lives with you."

I fell downcast, but only for the short half-second in between her response and mine, "She's the daughter of my father's best friend. Our families are just good friends. My mother wishes it was more than that, but that's just her." Another lie fell out of my mouth at the speed of light, so quickly it almost scared me how easy it was for me to say.

"I hope your mother can come to like me as well. But before that, I hope you like me, Naoki-san." Sahoko said.

"Does that mean you like me?" I asked.

"Well…" Sahoko fidgeted, "yes."

"Good thing. It's the same for me." I was at a loss for explanation of how awful I felt in the utterance of that statement.

And then I could've sworn on everything that I heard a familiar voice cry, " _No!_ " But it was very faint. I must've imagined it.

"Oh my." Sahoko said, a genuine smile taking shape.

Continuing down the path, we came to an open grass field and there I spotted two gardeners. I couldn't see their faces, what with the scarves they wore over their heads, but their voices were not to be mistaken for anyone else.

Since when had Kotoko become friends with Yuuko? More importantly, what were they doing here? It was good to know Kotoko was back to her old self at spying on my dates, but she shouldn't have been here. It was hard enough trying to forget about her when she _wasn't_ there.

I watched them from the distance as they fiddled with something and Sahoko and I travelled past the field and into the more extensive gardens.

"I've heard the oldest Bonsai tree here is over five hundred years old." I said, feigning interest in this conversation.

"I know. I've studied the gardens here in Tokyo a lot. I've always loved observing nature." Sahoko admired a patch of flowers just off the path.

"That's a nice hobby to have."

Behind us, the sprinklers went off, drenching the two gardeners whose high shrieks could have been heard through sound proof walls.

Sahoko turned back, "What's going on over there, do you suppose?"

Oh, I knew what was going on… Kotoko and Yuuko stupidly trying to set the sprinklers on Sahoko and I to ruin the walk. But I couldn't exactly say that.

"Must be just a sprinkler malfunction."

Kotoko let out another good screech and fell backward. At this, I chuckled, unable to hold it in.

The smile was wiped right from my face as I remembered what I was doing here. Ice swept through my veins. I'd given up, I had to remember. There was no more her.

Sahoko and I continued our colorless smalltalk.

Near the end of the walk, a caterpillar was thrown out onto the path in front of us. Another tactic by Kotoko and Yuuko.

" _Oh!_ " Sahoko screamed. She cowered from it.

I bent over and threw the caterpillar back where it had come from. Not a moment later, more screams came from behind the bushes, and then a splash as those two fell into the garden's pond.

"Oh dear, it seems someone's fallen into the pond." Sahoko said, stopping to observe.

"They must just be cleaning the pond. Come on. Let's go back now." I said with a face of stone. She nodded.

We found ourselves back at the glass doors and my mother and the Chairman waiting beyond them.

"I had fun talking to you. I hope we can see each other again soon." Sahoko said.

"Me too. I look forward to seeing you again."

Past the glass doors, my mother and I said our goodbyes to the Chairman and we were on our way.

…

Kotoko didn't get home until later. With her hair and clothes still wet, I supposed she'd gotten what she deserved for trying to interfere.

My mother ran her up a warm bath and I swapped out my suit for more comfortable clothes.

Kotoko had just sneezed and shivered for the umpteenth time when the phone rang. I answered without hesitation, awaiting a call from Chairman Oizumi about his thoughts on how the meeting went and an answer from Sohoko.

"Naoki Irie?" The Chairman said from the other line.

"Yes. I am so sorry for the way my mother acted today." I said.

"It's quite alright. Listen… the meeting went well, I think. Sahoko likes you and she'd like to make another date. Is that alright with you?"

"That's fine with me."

"Great!" Chairman Oizumi approved, "It's alright if I give her your number so she can call you herself, then?"

"Yes, please." I agreed.

"Alright. Expect a call from her sometime soon. Have a nice night." He said and the call ended.

That was when I found two spies at my door listening in. My mother busted in.

"Did they refuse to let you marry that girl?" She said, waiting for things to go her way since they always seemed to. Kotoko listened patiently behind her.

"No. The Chairman said Sahoko-san likes me and wants to move forward." I set the phone down.

"What?" My mother was shocked. Kotoko was speechless, her disappointment prominent.

"And I agreed."

"But Naoki!" My mother argued, but I wasn't about to be putting up with all this.

"I like her, what do you want me to do about it?" That shut them both up, "So, don't either of you try those stunts again." I glared Kotoko down in particular.

"What?" She tried to pretend.

"Did you think I wouldn't realize it was you?" I asked.

"I'm…" Kotoko mumbled, "I'm sorry." She left my doorway and my mother went after her.

I tried to feel relieved that the meeting had been a success, feel better maybe. But such attempts were a waste when the only voice in my head had to be silent to keep me from being unhappy about this, because I was drowning it out. Or rather 'her', to be exact.


	49. Chapter 49

**Chapter Forty-Nine**

With the ring of the phone came a twist of my gut. There was no other person this could be.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Naoki-san?" She said, her voice quiet and clear, "This is Sahoko Oizumi."

"Of course. I've been expecting a call from you." I said. I heard the front door open.

"I hope I didn't leave you waiting too long." She said. Actually, I'd been thankful for the two days it had taken her to call. I'd had a little peace.

"No, you haven't."

"Good. I'm calling to ask you if you'd like to have dinner with me tonight at Taiyo." Sahoko said. Her timidness made me fidgety. It was fair to say I wasn't comfortable talking with someone so shy anymore, having adapted to someone so loud that she did almost all the talking between us.

"I'd love to."

Kotoko entered the living room. I refused to look at her, to see her stricken face as she realized who I was talking to.

"Is it alright with you if we meet at seven?" The slightest alteration in her voice showed her excitement but it was so small, I wasn't sure I counted it.

"That's fine." I said, eager to hang up.

"Great. I can't wait to see you."

"Me either," I lied, my mood finding a new low-point, "I'll see you at seven."

"Bye." She said.

"Bye." While I was grateful to have ended this phone call, I stopped a second before hanging up. And then I had no choice but to face her. Kotoko was sullen, her eyes on the floor and her heart probably lower.

"I'm home." She said, her tone a ghost of what used to be enthusiasm.

"Welcome back." I tried to escape by her without any further communication. It proved an unavailing tactic.

"So, you're going on a date with Sahoko-san tonight?" She asked, her eyes unusually empty. She waved off her question, sparing me of answering it, "I'm sorry, it's not my business."

I faced her, knowing full well she wanted the answer, "We're going to dinner at Taiyo."

"Oh." She ran her gaze over me and then it landed on the floor in front of her again. I wished she would stop looking at me like that.

"But maybe I've said too much. I might have you following me there. What will it be this time? Cleaning toilets?" I said. I detested the way I sounded saying it.

Kotoko smiled loosely, but it looked like it wanted to break. While I wasn't actually _trying_ to hurt her, it was so easy to take my frustrations out on her.

I made my way out of the living room and upstairs. It was still so silent in the house. Kotoko may have been around, but she was abnormally still in the wake of my arranged marriage. I'd been trying not to let this drastic change get to me.

Upstairs, I dressed for the date with Sahoko and slipped out the front door in a hush so Kotoko wouldn't hear me.

I walked into town and hailed for a taxi. With Taiyo not far out, the drive wasn't long, but in the time that it took, my mind had burned itself out of being pessimistic.

 _She'll be more lively,_ I'd convinced myself.

 _Eventually._

Maybe I just hadn't been giving her enough of a chance. Maybe I had yet to warm up to her. _Just maybe_ , I would like her one day.

 _Yeah,_ I agreed, _I'll like her one day._

But for now, I strived for a simple interest in her, anything that made her likeable to me. This was what I was starting with.

I met Sahoko at Taiyo's doors a little after seven. Out of her kimono and in a regular dress, she looked more like a normal girl, though she still stood out from the crowd in terms of elegance.

"I hope you haven't been waiting here too long." I put on a false smile that, by now, felt close to natural.

"Only a few minutes." She squeaked, "Have you ever been here before?"

"I haven't." I said, holding the door open for her.

"Me either, but I hear its food is exquisite. This is one of my grandfather's favorite places to eat in Japan." Sahoko tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.

"A restaurant recommended by the Chairman must be a great place to eat."

"I think so, too."

The inside of the restaurant was dimly lit, the walls tall and made of brick and the tables lavishly adorned with bouquets of flowers. Above hung chandeliers.

From the front desk, we were guided to our reserved table. It was in a far off corner near a window placed strategically to face a pond out back.

"How beautiful." Sahoko said, in awe of the pond outside as the lowering sun hit it in all the right places.

A waiter brought our menus and we ordered our dishes without saying much to each other. She began when the waiter left with our orders.

"If we're going to go anywhere with this, there's something I want to know." Sahoko said, shy of sounding demanding.

"Of course." I said.

"About the girl that lives in your house… what's her name?" She asked. She couldn't have taken to any other topic?

I paused, "Kotoko."

"I see. It's just that your mother said some things last time and I thought I might've picked up on something." Sahoko said.

"Don't worry about anything my mother said. She was just trying to scare you away." I revealed an inviting smile.

"Then you didn't reject a girl's love letter?" She asked.

I didn't jump to answering, "I did, in high school."

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but it was the girl you live with who gave you the letter, wasn't it?" I would like to have known how she came to that conclusion, but she was smart for sure. I made sure my mind remained blank when answering these questions, otherwise this peaceful date might've taken a turn.

"Yes, it was."

The waiter brought our orders, hindering the conversation for until he was gone yet again.

"So, she likes you. But, you don't like her, right?" Sahoko seemed genuinely worried about this.

"Right. Like I've said before, it was always just my mother trying to pair us up. You have nothing to worry about." I reassured.

Sahoko lost any hint of the discontent she seemed to have been feeling and the date progressed onto easier topics. Our favorite places to eat, what books I read, how she got so invested in flowers and nature, and many other things. The conversation was light and easygoing, but still I was bothered by that undisrupted, quiet tone she used. She showed no emotion, lacking the excitement I'd grown accustomed to seeing.

I put an end to these kinds of thoughts as soon as they appeared. It was the only way I felt better about being here with her.


	50. Chapter 50

**Chapter Fifty**

It took three days until Sahoko called again, allowing my mind another short rest. And as I took off for the date, I filled my head with blank space to meet her at the art gallery we'd planned on going to.

Not to my surprise, I found her in another dress. Once again, she had arrived before me. That was a quality I liked: being on time.

"You look very beautiful in that dress, Sahoko-san." I met her with a smile that spelled truth and concealed any false feelings I held.

"Thank you so much. As do you look handsome in your suit. I like a well-dressed man." At least I could say that _her_ smile was sincere as she beamed at me in the dullest way possible.

We entered the double glass doors into a clean, bare building. With its white walls and glass floors, it reminded me of a hospital. But as we came farther down the hall and turned, it changed from bare walls to spattered with paintings.

Sahoko stopped to admire one of a cherry blossom tree.

"I wonder what the artist was thinking when they painted this. It's so peaceful. It's like every stroke of color flows into the next." She took a look below the frame and examined the name of the artist, "She sure is a very talented painter."

We wandered ahead, toward small groups of people scattered around the gallery, each examining a different painting or clay structure.

Another piece caught Sahoko's eye and we stopped.

"I feel like this artist must've been going through a hard time when he painted this. What do you think, Naoki-san?" She said.

I gazed at the painting. Splattered with black rain as the background lingered in shades of black and white, it held a familiar meaning to me.

"Yes, I agree with that. You have a good eye." I turned the attention back to her, dropping the thought of the painting off somewhere else far away from me and managing a meek smile.

"My grandfather used to bring me to these kinds of galleries a lot as a kid. I guess I just learned how to judge the emotions each work holds." She wrung her hands together modestly.

"Not everyone can do that. You're very intelligent."

This girl had nothing wrong with her, I reminded myself. She was the perfect kind of girl anyone would want. I would be lucky to marry her.

Sahoko came up to a twisty, billowy clay sculpture and looped around to examine it from all angles. She commented that its twists made it seem confused yet defined.

For only one swift moment, I could see Kotoko in here… running around, pretending to understand the meanings behind the works, and almost knocking over that twisty sculpture we'd just left behind.

The image fizzled out before it could have any effect on me.

Sahoko brought me to another painting and pursed her lips as she eyeballed it, "I'm not so sure about this one."

This painting was full of reds and oranges. It made me think that perhaps the creator was angry or frustrated when they made it.

We moved on and on through the whole gallery, Sahoko with insightful comments on each piece of artwork here. I was relieved when we came back to the doors to exit.

"I've had a great time. I hope we can go out again soon." Sahoko said.

I nodded in agreement, "Absolutely. I'll be in touch with you soon and we can arrange another date then." I wore another empty smile.

"I can't wait. Goodnight, Naoki-san." She waved me goodbye and departed.

I took straight off for home. It was dark out by now, so luckily it wasn't too far of a walk.

On the way back, I had the overwhelming feeling of lifelessness. This seemed to happen after every date with Sohoko. The conversations so bland and meaningless, they left my mind in a sort of void for the time being.

Halfway home, I heard a voice, the blank slate my mind had once been, disturbed.

"Hey… Mr. Handsome Man, in the suit." Kinnosuke said, sounding rather angry. He emerged from the darkness beyond a streetlight. I didn't stop for him. He was the last person I needed on my case. I just wanted to be left alone.

"On your way home from a date with that rich girl?" He taunted, trying to get a rise out of me. Needless to say, my mind was still a blank slate.

"Hey! Wait up!" He called and caught up to me. I stopped and faced him. There was no point in avoiding him.

"Just _how_ do you feel about Kotoko?" Such a blunt question, and one I wasn't going to answer for him.

I glared at him, "That's none of your business."

"Of course it's my business!" The way he was looking at me, you'd have thought I was a murderer, "You've been leading her on for a very long time now, making her think she has a chance when she doesn't and never did. I'm the one who has to hear about all of the things you do and see her not being herself because of you, unhappy."

Kinnosuke took a breath and so did I. I wondered about how hurtful some of what she'd told him was. It must've been pretty awful, considering how indignant he was with me at the moment. What was worse was that it was true. I'd been hurting her more than I wanted to, and especially in the last few weeks.

"Kotoko is such a special person to me. You're hurting my special person so badly and you expect me to keep my mouth shut? I can't anymore." Kinnosuke seemed to be warning me, but his threats were never more than meager.

"Then what are you going to do about it?" I questioned, truly curious about what was going on in his idiot head.

His nostrils flared and his eyes wanted to burn out of their sockets, "I'm going to take Kotoko away from you. If it takes everything in me to do it, I will get her over someone as cold as you. I'm through seeing her hurt, so now I'm protecting her from you."

My blood ran cold. I could see his determination. With the way he hated me, I must've been hurting Kotoko more than I'd known.

 _Maybe,_ I thought, _it would be better for her to be with him._

Kinnosuke and her were alike on many levels. He could understand her in a way that I couldn't. Me and her weren't a good match from the start. If he could do this, maybe I should just let him. I could let her be happy for once, because if she was with me, she was never going to be.

Kinnosuke continued, "So, continue on your way and don't bother her. I'm sure you understand since there's a girl you want to marry…"

 _No, I don't want to marry her._

"And if she's as precious to you as Kotoko is to me, then I hope you can just let us be. I really can't stand seeing her suffer so much anymore."

I had nothing else to say, letting his words sink in. My breaths shallow, my heart stilled, it was fair to say that it was quite painful. The thought of losing her was cutting, even if I'd already decided to let her go.

The air between us was silent. It seemed he wanted an answer out of me, but I had nothing left to offer.

"What do you say to that, Naoki Irie?"

I pulled my voice out of where it had been stuck in my throat, "Do whatever you want." I muttered as I made my way by him and home.

Inside the door, I ignored my mother and mechanically climbed the stairs to go to my bedroom. My mind loitered in between utterly blank and utterly sad. With this confusion, I felt sick to my stomach. My head pounded.

I laid my bag down on the desk chair and sat on the edge of my bed, wondering what I was doing. I sat back and rubbed my eyes, ready for today to be over, but not sure I was ready for tomorrow to begin either.

Like a slow leak in a dam, images of her began to creep into my mind with no purpose other than to make me miserable. What was once comfort was now becoming the death of me.

 _No._ I refused, wiping the slate clean again. Better to have no thoughts at all than to have that.

There was a knock at the door and Yuuki slipped in without waiting for an answer. I straightened up. He didn't need to see me like this.

"Are you really going to marry the girl you had the meeting with?" He inquired. I decided to pretend there was no reason for the doubt in his eyes.

"What's this, all of a sudden?" I said, bringing myself to sit up.  
"Are you?" He insisted.

"It'll probably happen, yes." My voice sounded gruff as I said it. My mouth wanted to reject forming the words.

Yuuki asked another, more prying question that he must've already known the answer to, "Do you really love her?" He knelt beside my bed.

"What is with this, Yuuki?"

"Tell me, please…" He bored into me, knowing my secrets, "Because you love Kotoko, don't you?"

My heart dropped and I stared at the wall. I opted out of talking about her, "I'll introduce you to Sahoko-san sometime soon. She's beautiful and I hear she's a good cook. I'm sure you'll like her." I smoothed out Yuuki's hair, "She's a good match for me." I crossed my arms, "I'm sure everything will work out."

Yuuki gazed at me. Being so smart, he had to have known that I wasn't happy with this, but he finally left me.

No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't convince myself into believing that Sahoko and I would be good for each other. And the harder I tried, it seemed, the more it was rejected.


	51. Chapter 51

**Chapter Fifty-One**

I woke slowly the next morning. The result of not having slept well, my mind was cloudy but still it had found a way to etch Kinnosuke's words into my brain. I'd been having some troublesome nights lately, but this one so far had been the worst.

Downstairs, I found the kitchen surprisingly quiet of the usual chatter between my mother and Kotoko. For once in the last two weeks, my mother was home for breakfast and not at the hospital doting on my father. It seemed likely that he would be returning home soon. Everything would return to normal. Well, maybe not everything.

One lone person sat at the table eating pancakes. My little brother ate in silence as my mother came into the dining room and sat a cup of coffee on the table in front of me.

"Morning." I peered around for Kotoko, but she was nowhere in sight and not to be heard.

"Morning." Yuuki said with his mouth full.

My mother gave me a sad look, "Kotoko is out on a date." My mother sat beside Yuuki, her head propped up on her arm and pouty as ever.

I was quick to remember those words I'd scribed so carefully into my head, "A date?" I said, my face having drained. It was becoming real.

Yuuki took me in and nodded, "She got dressed up all nice and left not long ago."

I froze for what felt like minutes, words unable to form. I guessed Kinnosuke was keeping his word. My gut twisted into a knot.

I regained the ability to move and took a sip of coffee, "I guess there's someone out there with weird taste." With the sip of the coffee came a bitter taste.

"Is this _really_ okay with you?" My mother searched and searched my face for anything that hinted at what she wanted to hear. But I had long since forced those feelings to evacuate.

Unwilling to answer this question, I myself evacuated the room.

"Don't you think you should eat something?" My mother asked. Somehow I wasn't hungry, so I shook my head.

"You'll have to excuse me." I brought the cup of coffee to my room where I sat at my desk with some files I'd brought home from Pandai.

Short of getting around to reading them, my phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Naoki," Iwasaki Shigeki answered, "I would just like to inform you that Chairman Oizumi came by just now and he wants to set up a meeting with the parents to have dinner and talk about future plans. He plans to call you soon, since he heard your father is being released next week."

"Thank you for telling me." I said. I hardened up and again my mind blanked. I couldn't have counted the numerous times it did that every day just so I could be alright with the arranged marriage.

"The Chairman has promised a significant amount of financial support. Our company is safe now that the merger is confirmed." He went on. Iwasaki must've thought this was good news, but all it brought was more dread.

"Alright, I'll be awaiting his call. Bye." I said.

"Bye."

I sat in my desk chair quietly for a moment, not working or even thinking. I needed this stillness while I could have it. When that stillness ended, one thought sounded through my emptiness that said: _This is the best option. Pandai is saved, my father can retire, Kotoko can still be with someone who loves her…_

I agreed with this and got to work reading the files in front of me.

Looking down on the papers, I saw the words, but I couldn't seem to get to reading them. They stayed put and stared back at me, beckoning me to fill my mind with anything other than this awful white space, but I wasn't so sure I wanted to think. After so many years burdened with numbers, words, and facts, it was nice to not be able to think for once.

I'd have liked to have stayed that way longer, staring at files but finding no meaning in them. I was disrupted when I received another phone call.

Seeing the number flash across the screen, I wondered what would happen if I didn't answer to her once. If I left just one call unattended. And although I took my time, I answered.

"Hi, Naoki-san," Sahoko started right away, "I was wondering if you were busy tonight." There might've been some excitement in her voice, but it was still more formal than anything else.

"I'm not." I said slowly.

"Then perhaps you'd like to come to a piano recital with me. One of my favorite musicians is in Tokyo tonight." She said.

I took a small moment. For once, I thought about turning her down. Then I decided that there was no way out, "Of course, I'd love to come. Where do I meet you?"

"Oshiko Theatre at eight o'clock. The recital starts at eight-thirty, but we'll need to find our seats."

"Great," I said mutedly, "I'll see you there." I didn't hesitate before disconnecting. I had to remind myself that everything was okay… better than okay. Pandai was saved. I could relax.

…

Like always, we met at the doors. Inside, a line shortened by the minute as people bought tickets.

"So, who is this musician we're seeing?" I said to start our usual bland conversations. I opened the door for her.

"His name is Takei Renjiro. I've seen him perform three times before now and I've bought almost all of his albums." Sahoko got into line next to me and more people appeared to gather behind us.

"I've heard a few of his pieces. He is quite a talented pianist." We moved up in the line.

"Yes, he is."

Within ten minutes, we had our tickets and were heading into the concert hall. Our seats were in the middle section of the auditorium and more toward the back, but Sahoko didn't seem to mind much.

"These seats aren't bad. The last time I saw him in concert," She said as we squeezed through those already in their seats, "I got much worse tickets. I'd been running late, so I had to sit way back in the corner."

"I hope you still enjoyed yourself." I found our seats and guided her to hers before sitting, myself.

"Of course. When I come to these, I can just lose myself in the music pieces. It doesn't matter how near or far I am from the stage." Sahoko wove her hands together and peered up the stage, anxiously awaiting the start of the performance.

And as we sat there not saying a word to each other, I couldn't help but wonder about Kotoko. Whether she'd come home yet or what she was doing if she hadn't. She'd been out all day at this point. She must've been having quite an enjoyable time to be gone this long.

"Look, here he comes." Sahoko pointed out as the well-dressed pianist traipsed out onto the stage, "He's so calm and composed. I wonder how he stays that way through the whole concert."

 _The same way you do._

Renjiro took his place on the bench. His fingers hovered over the keys for a moment and then he started out on a slow piece.

"The way he plays," Sahoko whispered, "so concentrated but peaceful. He knows everything he's doing and I can tell he's happy doing it. It makes me want to learn piano one day."

"I bet you would be a great player." I whispered back. With that look in her eye, she looked so motivated. There was only one person who had ever inspired me as greatly as that.

After that, Sahoko kept her eyes trained on the stage, her mind seemingly wandering. She wasn't the only one with her eyes trained on something, however, as the man sitting in front of us had his on the back of his eyelids. He hadn't been awake for long after the concert began and now, after the pianist had only covered two pieces, his head lolled to the side with a slight snore.

There was someone I knew who would've been doing the same exact thing if she were here.

After an intermission and multiple more pieces, the concert came to an end. Sahoko snapped out of her music-induced trance and we headed out with the crowd.

"Wasn't that a beautiful performance? I could really feel all of the emotion he put into it." Sahoko said as we rounded out into the hall where others stood reading their programs or chatting.

"Yes, it was. He even played one of my favorite compositions by Stravinsky." I said, putting on my obligatory smile.

"That's so like you. Because so many of his works were different, it earned him the name 'Chameleon'. You seem to share some of that mysterious quality. That's why I find you so attractive," She seemed embarrassed after she said this and went on, "I love how each of tonight's pieces were different, yet they all seemed to fit so well together. Don't you think?"

"Definitely."

"But it seems _some_ people don't appreciate such great talent. That guy in front of us made me so mad… falling asleep as soon as the performance started…" I stopped paying attention to what she was saying, as I could just picture it.

Kotoko falling asleep as soon as the concert started, happily nodding in and out of it, being a complete misfit in a concert hall full of socialites but still having the time of her life.

This image, though it lasted a mere second, made me laugh. Genuinely, for the first time while on a date with Sahoko, an _actual_ smile appeared.

"What is it, Naoki-san?" Sahoko appeared to be confused. The smile was dragged off of my face as I realized she was still here.

"Oh, it's nothing."

We stopped at the exit. She kissed my cheek and left me to find my way home.

…

I stopped before turning the doorknob, bracing myself for the whirlwind of questions and comments by my mother.

"I'm home." I called as I came through the door.

My mother bustled right in as if on command, "You're late." She said. Sure enough, my watch read that it was just past ten o'clock.

"I told you I would be late." I said, bored of these routine conversations and wanting to get to my bedroom so I could sleep (or try to sleep, rather).

"But why must you spend so long just listening to music?" She carried on with her hands on her hips.

"Mom…"

"You're not doing anything naughty with her, are you?" My mother suited a frown.

"'Naughty'? I'm not in middle school, you don't have to talk in code," She was quiet, "We're seeing each other with the idea of getting married. I'll leave the rest to your imagination." I said, although my mother would be imagining much worse than that simple peck on the cheek I'd received at the end of the date.

I made for the stairs while I had the chance. She tailed me there.

"But I haven't given you my approval yet!" She bellyached, her eyes wide.

"Dad already said that I get to choose who I marry. You agreed with him then."

"Yes, but only because I thought you meant Kotoko." I fell silent and looked away. Maybe I had, maybe I hadn't. Either way, it held no meaning now.

"That doesn't matter. I still get to decide who I marry in any case." I hardly made it up two steps before the front door opened.

"I'm back!" Kotoko said and then spotted us on the stairs. I was a little shocked. I'd have thought she was home by now, but she had to have been out for at least twelve hours today. And judging by that pleased, calm smile spread across her mouth, she'd been having a great day.

I went rigid, irked.

"Kotoko, you're home so late!" My mother turned her attention to Kotoko, "You were on a date, too, weren't you?"

"'Too'?" Kotoko took a glance my way, "Did Irie-kun have a date, too?" She questioned me with her eyes.

I planted myself on the step, clearly not going anywhere right now, "We went to a concert."

"Oh." Kotoko said, "And no, Mrs. Irie, I wasn't on a date. Actually, I was helping out at my dad's restaurant today."

"Does that mean you want to become a chef?" My mother said. I really couldn't see that working out, even with her determination which was a force to be reckoned with.

"No, no, that's beyond my abilities."

 _She finally knows her limits._

"That's good. You'd run your father out of business by getting people sick." I said before I could control it, my annoyance getting the better of me.

" _Aside from that_ ," Kotoko said, "I thought I could help with the service. Kin-chan was there all day, too, so he helped me a lot." And there it was. The single mention of his name sent needles to dance up my back.

"It might as well have been a date." I mumbled.

"Well, unlike _someone_ ," She faced me with a glare, offended, "I don't mix my personal life with business."

"There is such a person who does." I longed to simply climb the stairs and be done with this.

"What is that supposed to mean? You better apologize to Kin-chan!" She was angered by the insinuation. So much so that I could've guessed she was defending someone who was more than a friend.

"See? It was like a date." I said.

"Even if it was, it's none of your business!"

"Whatever. I have no interest in your love life anyway."

"You two, stop fighting," My mother intervened, and then she shone, "You're arguing like a married couple."

"No, we're not." We both said.

"Goodnight." I finally uprooted my feet to climb the rest of the stairs.

"Wait, Naoki! Are you going on another date tomorrow?" My mother called, not giving up the conversation.

"None of your concern. _Goodnight_."

I disappeared into my room. On the way, I noted the changes in Kotoko. She didn't seem as hurt anymore, maybe actually getting over it. The way she defended Kinnosuke stuck with me. Again, sleep didn't visit me that night.


	52. Chapter 52

**Chapter Fifty-Two**

We waited at the door for my mother to arrive with my father at hand, the congratulatory dishes prepared for his return set up in the living room. After all that he'd been through in the last few weeks, he was well-deserving of something better than hospital food.

As they pulled up the drive, Kotoko stood on the tips of her toes looking out the window. The car doors opened and closed and she rushed from the window.

"Here they come!" Kotoko handed Yuuki a party popper.

"I'm home!" My father called as he came through the door, my mother carrying his bag and fretting about him.

Kotoko and Yuuki set off the poppers and shouted their congratulations.

My father clutched his heart. His eyes squeezed shut and he stumbled. My heart stilled and dropped into my stomach. It seemed everything I was doing was in vain.

My mother panicked. Before I could rush to call an ambulance, my father straightened up. He lit up with a joking smile. I was more relieved than anything. His joking meant he felt better and that was all I asked in return for everything else.

"Just kidding! I'm as well as can be." He boomed with satisfaction.

"Don't tease us like that!" My mother scolded and crossed her arms, displeased.

"Sorry, honey."

"That's good," Mr. Aihara said, "It just means that he's back to being himself. Alright… let's celebrate!"

We headed to the living room where dishes littered the coffee table, one space left strategically empty. No one took notice of this space, however, as I hadn't told them anyone else would be joining us.

My father took his seat first and his mouth must've watered at the sight of such good food he hadn't seen in weeks, "It all looks so delicious. Thank you very much." He said.

"It's all your favorites. Eat as much as you like." Mr. Aihara said.

"Oh, you can't imagine how bland hospital food is. It's great to be back."

"Just don't overdo it." I told him on the assumption that he wanted to eat more delicacies than he should. And I'd read up on his illness before having to put down the medical books, so I could tell him very well what he needed to avoid, "You shouldn't drink alcohol right now, or eat anything too fatty or sweet."

"But I just got home, and I want to enjoy myself and relax." He admired the food as though it were suddenly in a place he couldn't reach.

"He's right, papa. Everything in moderation." My mother agreed.

"Right," My father nodded, "On that note, let's start eating!"

"First, a toast," My mother raised her glass and my father followed, "A few words?"

"My hospitalization caused a lot of worry and hardship…" he eyed me in a particularly remorseful way, "and forced some hard decisions to be made quickly. For that, I am so sorry. But with the help of everyone in this room, I was able to make a full recovery and come home safely. Thank you all so much for your support." He choked up, almost crying, "Cheers." We clinked our glasses.

"Now, let's eat," My mother said, "It's so nice to have the whole family together again."

I didn't have the drive to spoil her good mood while she had it, but any minute now, this tranquility would be disturbed.

The ring of the doorbell turned Kotoko around to peek the door, "Huh? Someone's here."

"That's weird. I didn't invite anyone else." My mother started to get up.

I allowed myself one last free breath before destroying the calm atmosphere and forced a smile onto my face for as long as she was here.

"That's because _I_ invited them." I broke away, avoiding her questions since they would be answered in a mere moment.

At the door, I found Chairman Oizumi standing with his hands behind his back, Sahoko following him and baring a bento.

"Good evening, Naoki." The Chairman said.

"Good evening," I said, "Welcome, come on in."

"You have a beautiful home, Naoki-san." Sahoko's eyes wandered around, observing the small paintings that dressed the hall in the way that she observed every piece of art.

I handed out my blank smile, "Thank you. The living room is this way."

"Chairman Oizumi!" My father said. My mother's jaw dropped and she looked furious. I wouldn't allow myself to look at Kotoko.

"Mr. Irie, we were informed you were discharged. Congratulations. Naoki invited us to celebrate with you today." He crossed the room. My father stood and bowed.

"Thank you for coming all the way here." He said.

"I'm glad you're happy."

My mother rushed across the room and dragged me into the hall.

"Didn't I say I wanted this to be a _family_ celebration?" She said in hushed tones.

"That's why I invited them. Whether you accept it or not, they're going to be your family soon." I rejoined the awkwardly still group in the living room.

"Dad, this is Oizumi Sahoko." I introduced them. She'd been talking about meeting my father, so I'd figured today would be a perfect day for that to happen, since he was well again.

"Nice to meet you." She stepped forward.

"Please sit down."

Kotoko moved so the Chairman, Sahoko, and I could occupy the couch. My father went around introducing everyone else.

"This is Naoki's younger brother Yuuki," He gestured at Yuuki who took her in apprehensively, "And this is Shigeo Aihara and his daughter Kotoko. They're good friends of ours."

"So, this is the young lady living with you? I've heard Mrs. Irie is quite fond of you, so I was curious." He wouldn't look away from her, to which she responded with a dazzling smile.

"Grandfather, you shouldn't stare like that." Sahoko said.

"My apologies, I was simply overcome by how cute you are." He finally tore his eyes away from her.

The words echoed within me. They saddened me.

Kotoko smiled wider, if that was even possible, "That's very kind of you!" Her cheeks burned.

From there, I didn't listen to the conversations much. Sahoko's hand-made bento was opened and placed in the empty space I'd left on the table.

"Oh my! You made all this yourself?" My father said.

"Yes, I did."

He took a roll and tasted it, "It's delicious. So savory and refreshing."

I, too, tried some of what she made. But I couldn't taste anything. Nothing I ate these days seemed to have a taste.

"Remarkable…" Mr. Aihara said after his taste, "You made this with sweet sake instead of sugar, didn't you?"

"Yes. I heard about President Irie's heart problem, so I didn't use sugar or fat in anything."

"You truly are good at cuisine for your age…"

Across the room, Kotoko sat unusually silent and as downcast as ever. It killed me. I hoped no one could pick up on it.

I didn't listen to the rest of the conversations, nor did I say much. The meal went by quickly and my father sat back patting his stomach.

"That was a great meal." He said.

I peered over to Kotoko to see how she was doing and Sahoko caught it. She paused and then she said, "Kotoko-san, can we speak outside for a few minutes?"

This took not only Kotoko by surprise, but me. It beat me what she might want to speak with her about.

"Sure." Kotoko stood and led Sahoko out of the room. The look Sahoko gave me before she left confused me. For some reason, I thought she might want to talk to Kotoko about me.

"Anyway, Mr. Irie, we'll be getting going soon. But I did want to talk about maybe having a formal meeting with the parents now that you're out of the hospital." Chairman Oizumi said. I'd had a sneaking suspicion he would fit this conversation in somewhere tonight.

"Of course," My father said, "We should plan that out soon."

My mother left the room. Soon followed Yuuki.

"How does next weekend sound?" The Chairman offered.

My father scratched his head, "Hmm… how about Sunday?"

"Sounds like a plan to me. I'll have to confirm with her parents, but I'm positive they'll be available that day."

They carried on discussing next Sunday and I had no input. When Kotoko and Sahoko returned after a few minutes, all seemed friendly. I guessed I had nothing to worry about.

After that, the Chairman stood and my father saw him and Sahoko to the door.

"I've had a great time tonight getting to know you all." The Chairman said.

"I have as well." My father said. Sahoko stuck by me instead of joining her grandfather at his car.

"Don't overtax yourself, and get better soon. Let's go, Sahoko." He hopped into the driver's side.

"I would like to take a walk with Naoki-san before going home." She said, but I got the feeling it was more than a suggestion.

"Is that so?"

"I'll make sure she gets home safe." I assured.

"Alright then. Bye." He took off down the driveway and out of sight. My father went back inside, and like that, the two of us were alone. We got going on the route to take to her house.

It took a few blocks before she spoke.

"Kotoko is a really nice girl." The statement caught me off guard. I didn't have a reply for it, "She told me she wishes us good luck."

Even just coming from Sahoko, it stung. I swept the sensation under my mental rug. Now wasn't the time for this. It was never the time for this. I was marrying Sahoko.

Sahoko went on since I still hadn't said anything, "I have another question or two for you, Naoki-san, if you'll answer them."

"Of course. What is it?" I said, although, whatever questions she had, I probably wouldn't want to answer.

"You seemed rather melancholy tonight, and you didn't speak much. Why is that?"

My insides screamed to tell the truth or risk implosion. Still, the corners of my mouth lifted into a plastic smile.

"I'm just tired. It's nothing to worry about." It was partially truthful, since sleep continued to slip from my grasp at night.

"Oh, that's good. Why are you tired?"

"Studying company files and such." Again, only a half-truth.

"If you're tired, maybe you should go home now and go to bed. I'm sure I can get home safely by myself. My grandfather can just be over-protective at times." She caught a wisp of her hair and tucked it behind her ear.

"Are you sure about that?" I asked.

"Yes, I am. Make sure to get a lot of rest. Goodnight." She walked ahead without me.

Once back at the house, I walked in to find a dark house, vacant of the life it had held before. I took off my shoes.

Kotoko emerged from the kitchen, "That took a while." She said quietly.

"Where are my parents? Sleeping?" We met at the bottom of the stairs.

"Yeah." Between us passed a silence that I saw as my punishment for subjecting Kotoko to all of this tonight.

"I see," I said and started to climb the stairs, "Well, goodnight."

"Wait…" Kotoko said and I faced her, "Sahoko-san really is a wonderful person, isn't she?"

"Yes, she is… pretty and a good cook." I said flatly.

"When I was talking with her, I could tell that she really loves you." Kotoko smiled, but this wasn't a true smile. The rest of her was forlorn, her spirit broken, "With someone like that loving you, it's no wonder you fell for her." She turned her back to me now, presumably unable to hide her despair any longer.

I paused, staring at the back of her head and hoping she wouldn't cry, "You should find yourself a good guy, too."

On the way to my room, I felt I'd destroyed her. Well underway was my own self-destruction as, piece by piece, parts of me withered away.


	53. Chapter 53

**Chapter Fifty-Three**

I hadn't been looking forward to this day much. That my father had made my mother promise not to raise too much hell in the wake of her disapproval made it better, but I was far from as happy as I should have been for someone marrying another.

On the drive to the same garden reserve the first meeting had been held in, my mother hid behind her sunglasses, silently disapproving of this whole thing. She straightened out her kimono.

"Are you absolutely sure about this, Naoki? You want to marry this girl? Because after this ceremony, it would be very hard to go back." My father said all that I already knew. Yuinos were a strong lock into an engagement.

"I'm sure." I said, sure that I needed to marry Sahoko. Even now, going back was not an option. Too many plans had already been made, promises arranged. Only now it would be made official with the exchanging of gifts and rings.

"Just as long as you're happy with it."

"I am." I said almost automatically. It was routine to give these answers without a thought.

"Alright." He said as though he didn't believe me. My mother cut in.

" _I don't see how you could be, with her being such a boring girl._ " She said.

At the garden reserve, we took the same elevator, but to a different floor. This time, we wound up in a much fancier room with high ceilings and formal seating.

It appeared we were the first to arrive.

"Oh, honey, stop looking so down." My father rubbed my mother's shoulder.

"How can I? This is the worst thing that could've happened." She took no heed to his advice and furthered her pouting. She set the gifts we'd brought with us on a table near the seating arrangements.

"I don't mean to upset you more, but there will still be a wedding ceremony after this."

She let out a defeated sigh, "Oh, I feel like crying."

"Mom, enough of that. Everyone else will be here soon."

We set up the wine and glasses and the door opened again. The Chairman first in line, he led Sahoko's parents and then Sahoko through. Her and her mother both wore red kimonos.

"Konya, Okita, this is Noriko and Shigeki Irie," Sahoko's parents bowed, and so did my own, "And this is Naoki, their son." This time, I bowed.

"It is a pleasure to meet you today." I said.

"As it is for us to meet all of you." Sahoko's mother said. She was a slight woman, though she seemed harsher than Sahoko.

"Then," Chairman Oizumi conducted, "We shall toast."

All seven of us bowed again before our seating cushions and took our positions on them. The Chairman poured the wine into the glasses. We rose them for the toast.

"Let us begin," He rose his as well, "To Naoki and Sahoko's future together." Each of us took a drink. Not fond of alcohol, I didn't take much. We got down to business.

My father passed my mother our gifts, each holding its own form of symbolism to how happy Sahoko and I were going to be together.

My mother somberly presented Sahoko with these gifts, bowing once more.

It was Sahoko's father who presented me with the same round of symbolic gifts. When that was done, the rings were brought forth.

I knelt parallel to Sahoko then, feeling every drop of my life drain out of me in an instant, any hesitation wiped away with it.

Robotically, I slid the sealing ring onto Sahoko's finger and she slid her's onto mine.

"Please take him onto yourself forever." The Chairman said.

"I humbly receive him," Sahoko said, "I take him onto myself forever."

"And I humbly receive her. I take her onto myself forever." I said. With the word 'forever', it felt more like a prison than a marriage. These simple statements had me locked in. There was no way out now.

"I am pleased to announce that Sahoko Oizumi and Naoki Irie are now formally engaged."

"I accept it with great pleasure." I said, but this ring weighed more than it should've.

…

Before leaving, Sahoko dressed down from her kimono and into a dress. After the Yuino, we'd planned to go somewhere together for another date. I chose to bring her to a place with a view I always appreciated. The river bend. After that would be a place more her style.

Approaching the bend, I had a few memories flood me. As usual, of course I saw an overall calmness about Sahoko, but she didn't enjoy the view quite so much as someone else had.

"My parents used to bring me here a lot as a child, especially during spring when the cherry blossoms bloomed." Sahoko said.

"The cherry blossoms _are_ very beautiful around here." I said.

" _So pretty!_ "

I heard the voice from far away, as though I'd hallucinated it.

" _I just love this view._ "

Near the very center of the bend, I spotted her. I was happy to see her for the moment before I noticed the person settled against the rail right beside her.

"Hey, isn't that Kotoko-san?" Sahoko went directly for the pair, "Kotoko-san?"

"Oh, hey, Sahoko-san! It was nice talking to you the other day." She batted her eyes and flashed her famous smile, but it faltered when it landed on me.

"What a coincidence meeting you here. You're on a date, too?" Sahoko said.

"Yes, we are." Kinnosuke threw his arm over her shoulder and fixed me with a victorious glance. Knots formed in my shoulders.

"How do you do?" Sahoko said with her best manners, "I'm Sahoko Oizumi, Naoki-san's fiancee."  
"Hi, I'm Kinnosuke Ikezawa. I'm a chef at Kotoko's father's restaurant." He presented himself clumsily.

"So, you're the successor of his restaurant?"  
"No, no, I'm just an apprentice."

"So," Kotoko shifted her gaze to Sahoko, "What made you come here today?"

"We're going to see an art exhibition in Ginza soon, and Naoki-san suggested we come here first. He said it was a great spot." Sahoko smiled over at me.

"She said she wanted to feel a sense of openness. This is just the place." I tried a hand at faking my best grin. Kotoko's face fell.

"Anyway," Sahoko said, "You could join us if you'd like. It's of Francis Bacon's early works."

"What?" Kinnosuke was befuddled, "Bacon?" Kotoko's brows knitted together, thinking hard.

"We… we prefer sausages over bacon. Don't we, Kotoko?" She nodded along. The two of them were so alike, it angered me.

I smirked, "You shouldn't force them to go, Sahoko-san. It's too much of a pain for them to go anywhere like that," Sahoko's eyes widened and her jaw fell slightly, "They should stay at their level."

And then she was exasperated, the most emotion I'd ever seen displayed on her face, "Oh my."

"Our level? What is that supposed to mean?" Kinnosuke took defensive stance.

"You're calling us stupid?" Kotoko said.

"That's not true?" I said.

Sahoko gaped at me, seeing me for the first time, "Naoki-san?" She asked. She had no idea how much of a stranger I actually was to her.

"Let's go, Kin-chan," Kotoko grabbed his arm and dragged him away, "Let's do something that suits our level!"

"Kotoko-san…" Sahoko appeared to almost go after them.

"Have fun with your bacon. We're going to eat sausages until we're full. Bye." She called as she and Kinnosuke marched away at a quick pace.

A feeling of absolute dread came upon me so fast that there was no time to stop it, "Kotoko," She hindered, "You two are perfect together."

Kotoko shone her teeth at me one last time, "Why, thank you."

Watching them disappear from the bend, I nearly forgot that Sahoko stood beside me and must've been shocked to her core.

"What's wrong?" She asked me, her expression a mix between concern and suspicion, "Why would you say such a mean thing? It's not like you."

"It's not like me? Don't worry, though. I'd never talk to you like that." This didn't make better the situation. Instead, it might've even vexed her.

She took a short few seconds before saying anything more, "You're a great businessman, and you're incredibly smart. You seem to know everything. But you don't know your own feelings, do you, Naoki-san?" She gave me a disappointed look, "I'm going home for today."

After she left, I hung around the bend with my thoughts as a few tourists poured in to take pictures.

I was tormented.

Tormented by the things she'd said, the things I'd said, and by wondering if Sahoko had suspicions over me and Kotoko. She was a smart girl after all, keen to sensing emotions. Who was to say she couldn't figure it out on her own?

I stayed there for I don't know how long, anguishing over too many things at once. When I finally did make it home, it was dark out and I was ready to go to bed.

"You're late again." My mother said, though she didn't sound very concerned. Perhaps she had given up at last, "Kotoko's late, too." It ripped through me, the sentence baring its nasty teeth along with all the possibilities of what they were doing.

"I see." I said.

"She's been coming home so late, but this is the latest I've seen so far. I wonder if she'll come home at all tonight." My mother wobbled and I could see that she'd been drinking.

"Goodnight." I said as bleakness rang its bell.

"They're moving out, you know," I hadn't even thought about this part of the ordeal and it bit me, "Are you sure you're okay with that?"

For once, I didn't confirm nor deny. I just couldn't seem to utter the answer.


	54. Chapter 54

**Chapter Fifty-Four**

Tonan felt like a graveyard. As I dug around in my locker and shoved books into my bag, it was as though I'd already dropped out. I couldn't say that that thought hadn't crossed my mind but that wasn't my reason for coming here today.

I had to gather a few things, enlighten my professors on this situation, and lengthen my absence from one month to two. After that, I would be meeting Sahoko at a coffee house about a mile from here.

After having completed all three of my objectives, I started down the hall. Ahead, a group of students chatted.

"Oh, hey, Irie!" One of them said. I recognized him as Hoshi, who I'd worked with on a thesis last fall, "You're getting married, right?"

If I had a nickel for every time I was congratulated today, Pandai wouldn't need a merger.

"Yes, I am."

"Congratulations." He said.

"Thank you."

On the way out, I thought to stop by the tennis practice underway and catch a glimpse of Kotoko as she clambered about to pick up balls and dodge out of the way of the ones that flew her direction. It wouldn't be long before even this small thing would be taken from me.

I searched for her through the few remaining ball collectors. Not a single one wore her signature highlighter pink.

Sudo caught me as I watched from the entrance.

"Aihara isn't at practice today, in case you were wondering." He said.

"I see," I said, but I continued to let my eyes search, "Well, I have things to do. Bye."

"Oh, Irie… I heard you were getting married. Congratulations." Sudo said with genuine happiness for me.

"Thank you," I repeated, "By the way, I've extended my absence another month, so it's not likely I'll be able to compete in next week's tournament."

"That's alright. You just focus on what's more important. See you later." Sudo sped back to the court and picked up his racket to destroy a few lives with.

Before I could manage to make it out of the court, Yuuko jogged over, the first time seeing each other since the night she confessed.

"Long time, no see!" She said.

She didn't look as at ease as she sounded, "How are you?" I asked, hoping she didn't think I was avoiding her as a friend. I just hadn't had the time.

"You rejected me," She half-smiled, "But I'm okay," Her confidence was blemished, but it was present, "Are you quitting school?"

I'd come close to dropping out today when I came here, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. Once I dropped out of college, it meant I was taking over Pandai. It would mean the end of making my own decisions.

"Probably." I said

Yuuko gave me a different look then, one of disappointment, "I don't like her. It's boring that I can't say anything against her." She joked. It was good to know that she was still herself.

"That's so like you." I gave a tired, worn smile.

The joke faded, "I hope you stay the way you are even when you're married. Can you at least promise me that?"

I wasn't so sure I _would_ stay the same. A lot of things were going to change, but it wouldn't start with the marriage. It was going to start with my dropping out. And then Kotoko and her father would move out and I'd never see her unless by chance. As Kotoko was going to be phased out, Sahoko would be phased in as her replacement, although I couldn't quite say she would do much justice in being such.

Still, I gave her a nod and she rushed back off to practice.

Heading back through Tonan's traffic, I thought once again of just quitting today while I was here. It would save me the trip, but I was held back. While it was something I would be doing soon, I had the ache that I would regret it throughout my life.

I passed some old classmates from the engineering department who turned their heads so quick one would've thought they'd seen a ghost. Alas, I was a ghost in a different sense.

I turned off the main walkway and onto the one that would lead me out of here.

"Naoki Irie!" A girl shouted and pointed at me. It would be my luck to have to run into Kotoko's two idiot friends before I could make a clean break.

"What are you doing at school?" The tall one, Satomi, went on in an obnoxiously loud voice.

"Is there something wrong with that? I'm still enrolled, no matter being absent." Her nonsensical shock agitated me.

She and the other looked to each other with some sort of mischievous expression, telepathically communicating something.

" _I see_ …" The other, Jinko, drew out, "But, you know, Kotoko already left for today. Too bad..."

By the time she could finish what she was saying, I'd already decided I didn't want to play these games with them.

"I didn't ask." I said as I continued past them. They glued themselves to my hip and followed closely.

"She went to the restaurant already." Jinko said despite my desire to discontinue this conversation. Furthermore, it had to be a lie. Kotoko's father's restaurant wasn't open today.

"How? It's closed today." I increased my step to be away with them. They were unrelenting.

"Oh, you know very well, don't you?" Satomi taunted me with a knowing smirk, "But she didn't go there to work today. She's actually gone to be with Kin-chan and practice her cooking."

I slowed a little. I hated hearing about this every time it came up. And now it sent an unnerving feeling up my spine.

"Practice cooking?" My skin crawled with images of those two, of Kinnosuke finally achieving his goal to be with Kotoko.

"Actually, it's just an excuse," Jinko said as though she were sharing a juicy secret, "She's gone to give him an answer to his proposal."

My blood ran cold.

"Proposal?"  
"Oh, something the genius doesn't know! Kin-chan proposed marriage to Kotoko." She eyed me, hungry for a reaction… a reaction I was too stunted to give. Marry Kinnosuke? But she loved me, didn't she? This far, I'd been thinking her dates with Kinnosuke were remedial somehow, since I was supposed to marry Sahoko.  
But I guessed they weren't. It threw a wrench into my gut.

"Jinko, you weren't supposed to do that!"

"Oh, who cares?"

"Somebody decided to have a marriage of convenience with a rich girl. Kotoko was so down, but she's realized her real love now."

Hearing all of this, I felt terrible. My mood dropped to an all-time low as my heart sank lower and lower. It was finally happening. She was being taken from me. For the longest time, I'd unrealistically thought she would always just be mine. I was being stripped bare of all that I held of importance.

"That's right," Satomi jumped in, "A love that doesn't get affected by money."

"Well, we just thought you should know. Excuse us."

Her friends left me, but their words clung.

On the walk to the coffee house, my feet dragged. Parading around with Sahoko and pretending to be happy was the last thing I was interested in doing. I was scaling a tightrope that was about to snap, but I urged myself forward into the inevitable, drawn back by the life I wanted to have versus the life I was going to have.

A drop of rain hit my cheek. A storm swept in quickly and without warning. Strong gusts of wind whistled through the trees, and the dark clouds let loose spurts of rain. All those around me took out their umbrellas, but I didn't reach for mine just yet. The rain poured over my head. I allowed for the cool rain and crisp air to nip me, so I could feel something other than this hollowness.

I was good and wet by the time I opened the umbrella, goose bumps having risen underneath my soaked sleeves.

When I reached the coffee house, Sahoko was already there. She sat properly in a booth by the window, dry as she could have been.

"Oh, Naoki-san," She said as I sat opposite her in the booth, "You got caught in the rain?"

"Yes." I nodded, not even attempting that fake smile that had been beaten to a pulp.

Sahoko analyzed me. With the way she did so, I wondered how much of my oppression she could sense, "Are you okay? You seem a little off."

"I'm alright." I didn't think the smile played out right since her expression worsened with it.

"It's too bad it's raining out. We could've gone to a park. Weather like this really does ruin plans." Sahoko held her gaze out the window. Weather, however, wasn't the only factor in the ruin.

"So it seems." I rested my chin in the palm of my hand. I didn't have it in me to search for longer answers.

"There's something I've been meaning to ask you," She said, "What kind of wedding do you want to have?"

 _One that I'm happy about._

"I don't know. What about you, Sahoko-san?"

"Me? I think I'd like a traditional wedding. My parents had one and I always loved the pictures and the way my mother told me about it. It all seems very magical to me. Except that I'd like mine to be smaller…"

I zoned out of it as she described to me her ideal wedding. Sahoko wanted such a simple wedding, one that you could mistake for any other girl's.

I could imagine Kotoko giving a much different answer.

She would tell me about what a long train she wanted her dress to have, how we'd both ride in on white horses, and doves would fly. Ridiculous things like that. It would've brought an actual smile to my face had I not realized that Kotoko wasn't here.

Sahoko was here instead, and I stared right through her as she spoke. It was right here in this diner, as Sahoko doled on and thunder plowed through the sky, that I woke up.

 _Wait._

A voice said, countering all that my future had been built around in the last month. I remembered that I _did_ have a choice. I could marry Sahoko or not. I could take over Pandai or not. And I was making the wrong choices.

Everything I'd been working to advance for my future was wrong. I didn't want this for myself, but for my father, and that was not a good enough reason to want it.

 _I still love Kotoko._

 _I can't marry Sahoko._

I'd tried to force it to change, but I hadn't succeeded. But she didn't know that and now she was off with another guy, possibly accepting a marriage proposal.

I was jolted into the harsh reality that I had to do something about this. It might not be too late right now, but if I waited any longer, it would become so.

I let Sahoko keep talking about her plans as I mapped out what I should do next. Realizations hit hard and fast, forcefully showing me all of my mistakes, all the ways I'd hurt Kotoko in the last month. It showed me how I was needlessly about to hurt Sahoko as well. All this time I'd been trying to help my father, and all it was resulting in was pain for everyone involved in it.

If she married Kinnosuke, and I to Sahoko, my life would transform from the colorful scape of smiles that it was, into a dull, lifeless gray. Because I would never love Sohoko. It would always be Kotoko.

And then she said something that brought me to attention.

"Naoki-san, you don't want to marry me, do you?" Her eyes pierced me with how intense they were in this very moment. I was left speechless. In my hesitation, she would have all the answers she needed.

"Okay, can you answer me one thing? I've been seeing this for a little while now and I can't dismiss it. You act completely different around Kotoko-san. Why is that?" She asked, although she looked like she already had the answer. And maybe she'd had that answer for a while.

Outside, it grew darker and rain pummelled the window. Thunder rolled ahead. Again, I had no answer that she didn't already know.

"You're in love with her, aren't you?" I brought my focus back sharply on her. She was sad and embarrassed. The least I could do was speak.

"Yes," I said, "I'm sorry."

Sahoko focused on the table.

"I guess this is where this ends, then," She slipped the ring off her finger and set it on the table in front of me, "I hope you can find happiness." I swallowed my words as she left. There was so much more I should have said, but my priorities had shifted.

I, too, made my way out of the coffee house as I shoved her ring into my pocket. Mine soon met it there and I braced myself for the storm.

 **A/N: I promise not to make you wait too long for the next chapter. Yes, I know these are short. Trust me, everything I write has short, tiny little chapters. Hope you're having a great weekend. ;D**


	55. Chapter 55

**Chapter Fifty-Five**

With as long a walk as it was to the restaurant, my clothes had dried. It was still raining, but night had closed in. Street lights lit up around me. Although there might've been a good chance Kotoko and Kinnosuke were already gone, I had to see for myself. If they were there, I still wasn't positive about what I was going to say. I just hoped I wasn't too late.

Not after having changed so much because of her, and learning to be a better person. She was all I needed to function the way I should. She motivated me in a way no one else was ever able to, and that was something I couldn't afford to lose.

But I could feel her letting go now. She was slipping through my fingers at a slow but steady rate. I was losing her if I hadn't already lost her entirely.

If she'd already agreed to Kinnosuke's proposal, I'd have ruined Pandai's chance for a merger for no reason. And if she'd accepted it, it meant she might have some feelings for him other than friendship. This thought quickened my pace, making it in-step with my panicked thoughts.

For someone who had been so wholeheartedly devoted to me to be resorting to this, I must've been messing up horribly. Lightning split the sky as I relied on the idea that I hadn't made the biggest mistake of my life.

I came to the street of the restaurant and sped up even more, eager to know what was going on inside.

I took a breath before I peered through the window, preparing for whatever it was I was going to see. I looked in and all I found was an empty restaurant shrouded in darkness. They had to have already left.

I stood underneath the overhang and lowered my umbrella, thinking about my next move. I hadn't found her. There was no telling what those two could be off doing. My case was more hopeless than ever, and I could imagine that if Kotoko had accepted the proposal, I may not ever tell her how I felt about her. That was for the chance she no longer loved me.

But it wasn't the time to give up just yet. She had to still love me. She _had_ to.

I rose my umbrella back over my head and started home.

The lightning left and the thunder rolled away for now, but the rain stayed. It lightened, though only by a touch. Doubt drove through me, a constant occurrence, as I thought this could be the end. I'd been too stubborn to find a different way to save Pandai and not end up engaged to the wrong girl. There might've been a way had I not gotten Sahoko involved, but the Chairman was going to despise me for doing this to her, for pretending.

The doubt that I would be able to find Kotoko and talk her out of this grew higher with every step that I took forward. Around every corner, I expected to see her, but instead I found only empty streets and puddles.

And then my feet stopped. A girl in a pink sweater crouched below a large tree, trying to keep dry of the rain and not succeeding. I came closer and searched her hand. No ring. I held my umbrella over her.

Kotoko finally looked up, "Hey." I said. The back of my shirt was dampened by the rain for the second time.

"Irie-kun… what are you doing here?" She asked.

"I was looking for you." I answered, no longer for the lies I'd been telling to myself and everyone else.

"Looking for me?"

I held out my hand to help her up and she studied it as though she'd manifested it. She took the offer and I helped her to her feet. We got onto the sidewalk to make for home. I couldn't remember the last time I was so, but I was nervous. I still hadn't pieced together what I was going to say to her.

I took a few moments to figure it out.

"Were you with him?" I said, not caring how it looked at this point in the game.

Her eyes held questions, "What?"

"Ikezawa."

"Oh," Kotoko nodded, "Yes, I was." She sounded proud, and locked her hands together behind her back. It almost seemed to me that she was presenting how over me she was. It did nothing to ease my suspicions.

"I heard he proposed." I was swiped by more rain as the doubt swelled in my chest.

Kotoko didn't answer me at first.

"That's right. I'm not completely unwanted." She refused to look at me. It made me feel just a little bit sick.

"What did you tell him?"

A string of thunder broke through the silence she offered me.

"What I told him doesn't concern you since you're marrying Sahoko-san." She snapped. It might've been the first time I'd heard any true anger from her. Still, somehow, I couldn't tell her that it had been broken off.

"Right." I said. There were another few moments of silence between us, during which the rain quickened. The hard drops against our only cover loud and the rain sweeping sideways, the umbrella was almost useless.

"My father and I are moving out." Kotoko said. It was reminiscent of when she'd told me the same thing last year, but now I hated it more, "We've decided it's better for us to be gone so you and Sahoko-san can feel more comfortable when you're married. We've been needing to move out for a while now, anyway," she went on, all the while I felt worse, "We'll move out and I'm going to marry Kin-chan. And we'll take over my father's restaurant."

 _She accepted it._

"You love him?" I stopped her.

"Of course," An overbearing chill took me over, "He has loved me since the very _first_ year of high school." She sounded too happy with the way she said it.

"Do you love him just because he tells you he loves you?" My own anger drew out. I stopped walking and forced Kotoko to face me.

"Oh, is that a problem?" She bored her eyes into me, disgusted with my questions, "I've loved someone who doesn't love me back for too long, and I'm tired of it! I want to love someone and not get hurt because of it. So, you should just concern yourself with your fiancee and leave me alone."

I grabbed her shoulders, losing the umbrella and getting drenched, "You love me!" I said, unable to accept what she was saying, "You'll never be able to love anyone but me."

Kotoko was startled, and then it morphed into perturbation, "You sure are confident…That's right! But what can I do when you don't love me at all? You don't-"

I kissed her, bringing her to me so fast that I couldn't control it. With all that she was saying, there was nothing else I wanted to do to counter it, and I couldn't have stood for her telling me I didn't love her a second time. I tingled the way I'd been aching to feel again since the day in the hospital. My heart jumped the way it never had for Sahoko.

When I pulled away from her warmth, she gawked at me, "Don't ever tell me that you love any man other than me."

She flushed with exuberance. And then I guessed she realized she hadn't imagined it. She spoke, but in a low tone, "That's the second time you've kissed me." Kotoko said.

"It's the third." I admitted.

"What? But it's clearly the second…"

"You don't have to count anymore." I touched my lips to hers again, and then to her forehead as I brought her into an embrace. I couldn't believe how late I'd almost been.

I don't know how long we stood there, minutes or seconds, but when it was done, my hand reached for hers, "Let's go home."

The umbrella forgotten, we continued to soak, but the cloud cover started to break. The rain lessened until it was nonexistent. Her hand squeezed mine like I might let go, and I couldn't imagine why I would.

All the way back, I could hardly believe what I'd just done. Somehow, I never thought the day would come that I put it all out there, that I let everyone else in on my secret. Yesterday, only I and my little brother had known. Today, everyone would know. And I wasn't ashamed in the slightest. With her hand in mine, the one thing I felt was content.

We didn't speak on the walk home. The sound of water running into drains and of the thunder growing farther away was relaxing. But two blocks from home, Kotoko interrupted the hush.

"Um… what are you going to do when we get home?"

"I don't know." I said, but I had a thought. I wasn't opposed to getting married, just opposed to marrying the _wrong girl_. It took an instant to confirm that this was what I wanted to do.

"What about Sahoko-san? Aren't you engaged?"

 _I will be soon._

"Not anymore."

Arriving at the gates of the house, Kotoko said, "Wow!" She pointed upward, "A shooting star." She closed her eyes to make a wish. I only caught half a glimpse of it before it was gone, but I had no wishes to make. When she was finished, we came up the driveway.

At the front door, I stopped to give myself a moment to breathe. This was all happening so fast.

"Are you ready?"

"Ready?" She asked.

I opened the front door to a flurry of conversations coming from the living room in hushed voices. My mother made a commotion about the two of us.

"Naoki, Kotoko! You're all wet. I'll go get some towels." She hurried off.

"No, wait," I called her back, "You should be here for this." My mother cocked her head, completely confused.

My eyes landed on Kotoko's father who sat on the couch, seeming distressed. I could imagine what they had been talking about before we came in.

"Mr. Aihara, I would like to speak with you." I said.

He got to his feet, "You should get into some dry clothes first, and then…" He began. Maybe I should have, but I was through with the waiting games.

"Please give me permission to marry your daughter."

He was taken aback. My mother gasped, Yuuki's jaw dropped, and my father was simply befuddled.

"Irie-kun…" Kotoko said. She stared at me like she'd hallucinated.

"Are you serious, Naoki?" My father said. Maybe he'd already begun to think of Pandai, but I wasn't going to worry about it for the time being.

"Yes, I am."

"What about Sahoko-san?" He asked.

"I can't go through with it. We broke it off because I finally realized it wasn't what I wanted." Mr. Aihara waited for a continuation, "Of course, it wouldn't be right away, and I would want Pandai back on its feet beforehand, but I can't think of anyone else that I want to be with but Kotoko." I peered at her and she turned red. She didn't appear to have any objections.

"Can we have your consent, Mr. Aihara?"

"Naoki, she can't do much correctly, you know?" He said, "She's not smart, and can't cook." He tested. But I'd come to terms with her flaws long before now.

"Yes, I know."

"She's clumsy and hasty. She makes mistakes all the time." I smiled at this.

"Yes, I know." Kotoko looked like she was being shot at.

Her father became emotional, "But she is cheerful and dedicated. She's a very lovable girl."

"She is." I said.

Mr. Aihara just about started to cry, "Naoki, please do take good care of her. You have my consent."

"I will." I said. A sense of relief washed in. I felt I could finally be myself again, "Is that alright with you, Kotoko?"

She bit her lip and nodded, "Yes."

My mother's shrill squeal killed my ears, "Kotoko-chan! I've been waiting for this day for _so long_!" She leapt for joy and zipped over to hug Kotoko.

Now it was time to have a word with my own father, "Dad, can I have a word with you in the hall?"

He stood, "Yes."

The living room erupted with cheers from my mother, so I doubted anyone could hear what was going on in the hall.

"I'm sorry for doing this," I started with, "I know this jeopardizes Chairman Oizumi's aid. It'll be a big loss for Pandai, but I can't put on a facade anymore."

"Naoki, I told you from the beginning that you didn't need to do that. I can handle Pandai for now." He crossed his arms over his chest.

"Are you sure about that?" I said.

"You underestimate me. I am the one that should be sorry. You went through all this for my welfare and I shouldn't have allowed it. You can go back to school and study what I know you want to do. I can take Pandai from here."

"'What you know I want to do'?" I asked.

"I received a call back a while ago from the university about the change in your studies. So, I am telling you… go study medicine. Leave this to me. I've been running it well all these years anyway." He patted me on the shoulder. I couldn't express how surprised I was at his acceptance.

"Dad…"

"I will talk to Chairman Oizumi and get this sorted out. For now, all I want is for you to follow your dreams." He smiled.

"Thank you very much."

My mother rushed the hallway, "You two need to get changed before we can celebrate anything. You're soaking wet." Kotoko shivered as she hurried up the stairs, "Go get towels and dry off before you get sick."

Even my father shooed me off. Upstairs, I dug a couple of towels out of the hallway closet and knocked on Kotoko's door.

"Come in." She called. When seeing it was me, her face reddened again, "Oh."

"You forgot to get a towel." I threw it over her head and she giggled. She gazed amazedly up at me with so much admiration, I knew I'd made the right choice. Her eyes fell onto the floor.

"I'm scared," She said, "I feel like you'll take back everything you said tomorrow when I wake up, and never admit to it."

I couldn't pass up the opportunity for the sake of teasing her, "Then should we sleep together?"

Her cheeks deepened in color, "That's not what I meant." She fretted.

I played with the towel on her head. The way she responded to everything and the way she looked at me now told me she was having a hard time believing in any of this.

"Are you sure I'm okay?" She asked.

"Yes." She beamed the brightest I'd seen her do so in about a month.

"I love you a lot, Irie-kun." That innocent grin still did a number on me.

"I know, more than enough."

"But I didn't know that you loved me." Kotoko said. To be fair, an average girl might've figured it out by now without having to be told, no matter how well-hidden it was.

"You won me over," I said and brought her close, wrapping my arms around her, "I love you."

And it was a wild weed. One that grew from nothing and couldn't stop after that. It never would, either.


	56. Chapter 56

**Chapter Fifty-Six**

"Kotoko, have you lost your mind?"

"Poor thing…"

"It's true!" Kotoko argued with her friends from across the walkway. Jinko and Satomi gaped at me like there was no stranger thing in the world.

That was when they got louder, unintentionally announcing the news to everyone within a thirty-foot radius. And I doubted it would stop there. If I knew them at all, they would repeat it to everything with a pulse.

Some were outraged, others in amazement, as I could tell from the looks I got on the way to class… The man who was engaged to one girl one day, and a different one the next. And for once, I didn't care about the rumors because my strifes were at their finish. I may have still been in the engineering department, but these would be my last weeks attending.

"Irie-kun!"

 _Here we go._

Yuuko caught me the moment I entered the classroom.

"Hey," She said and surveyed me, "I've been hearing some things today, and I just want to make sure it's true before I say anything."

"What have you been hearing?" I said, as it wasn't unlike rumors to become distorted in passing.

"Well, that you're engaged to Aihara now. Are you?" Yuuko went on considering me, searching me for the answer. I couldn't tell if she was intrigued or offended.

"Yes." I said.

She nodded, "I see… congratulations. But, if you don't mind me asking, what happened? You seemed so set on marrying Oizumi-san."

Since that had been the case yesterday, I supposed her questions were warranted, "I couldn't." I gave the simple answer.

Yuuko said, "At least I can say Aihara deserves it. The distance she went to get you was admirable, I will admit," she smiled now, "Anyway, I hope you're happy."

"Thank you."

The class began. Throughout it, some fancied catching glimpses of me, either out of confusion or to judge. Half of me wondered if I was still in high school, to be the focal point of the majority's gossip. The other half of me understood it. I had been absent for a solid month, ran a business, got engaged and re-engaged all in that time frame.

With my first class ended and an hour freed up from having dropped a class last semester, I went for the library to read my medical books.

It was different being in the library and reading. This time, it wasn't a secret and I knew for a fact that my transfer was in progress.

I read for a while and finished a textbook. Taking that as my queue to wrap up, I made again for the door. That was where I came across Kotoko.

"I was looking for you," She said, "And… um… I was wondering if you would come with me to help tell Kin-chan. He won't let me talk to him." She sucked up with a wide smile. This didn't come as a surprise, though. Kinnosuke was often difficult, but if he wasn't talking to Kotoko, he certainly wasn't talking to me as I'd stolen his dreams from him less than twenty four hours ago.

I sighed, already seeing it going down in my head, "Yeah. I'll come with."

"Thanks. Anytime I try to talk to him, he cuts me off and says he's busy. I feel so bad about doing this to him."

But, as bad as it sounded, Kinnosuke had known from the start the risk he was taking. Now he just wasn't facing up to the consequences of said risk. He was making this harder than it had to be.

Across campus, we approached the back of the cafeteria building where Kinnosuke was tending to the garbage.

"Wait here, I want to try one more time." Kotoko straightened herself out, took a breath, and made for him.

He footed it to the door the moment he saw her.

"Kin-chan…" She hurried to catch him in time.

"I'm very busy today. Sorry, I can't talk right now." He said and reached for the door handle. She claimed his arm.

"Wait, I need to talk to you about something. Please." Kotoko tugged him back. Kinnosuke took his hand off of the knob.

"I don't want to hear it."

"Stop a minute!" She said, becoming upset. He went to swing the door to the cafeteria open and I stepped into view. I may not have been a person he wanted anywhere near him, but it seemed to be the only thing that brought his refusal to a grinding stop.

"Ikezawa," there was an instant shift of emotions, disappointment into blind hatred, "Do you have a minute?"

He seethed and reclosed the door. Kinnosuke faced me dead-on and crossed his arms, " _Naoki Irie_ …" he said, "We have nothing to talk about."

"But we do." I joined Kotoko.

Kinnosuke was perfectly silent, but his eyes followed my every move, hating me more with every word I uttered.

"I'm marrying Kotoko. We just thought you should know."

Still silence, but now he was disgusted as well.

"Kin-chan, please say something." Kotoko said, pleading with her eyes for him to open his mouth. I, for one, hoped just the opposite.

And with all the malice he could conjure up, Kinnosuke said, "So, you're really going through with it, are you? I've been hearing this all day, thinking " _no way that's true, she wouldn't marry someone like him after all he put her through_ ". I don't understand how you could love him after all this," he turned to me now, "Do you realize how much you hurt her?"

Beside his rage and loathing, I could see his pain, and I actually felt for him. Despite being total opposites, I understood him a little better.

"I didn't want to." I said with full truth.

Kinnosuke offered a bitter breath of a laugh, one of someone shutting himself off, "I can't believe this… I don't have to be hearing this from you of all people. You're despicable. You feel nothing." Before her, that might've been true, and it was a huge reason I couldn't have let her go.

"To you, I am truly sorry. But I can't let you have Kotoko." I said. He stared at something in the distance.

"I have loved Kotoko for a long time. Tried my hardest to win her over for _years_ , and you traipse in and take her in one day," He locked eyes with me, "I don't need your pity. Just stay away from me." He lifted off through the door.

Kotoko watched it long after he had gone, her face twisted in grief, "I feel like such a bad person."

I hugged her around the shoulders. Kinnosuke may not understand now, but maybe later he would see that I was not the same person I had been. And for that, I could only hold one person accountable. He may have hated me for taking that person, but I hoped he would see why someday.

 **A/N: Yes, I know the chapter is short, but I thought I should let you know that, for the first part of the fic, there will be one more chapter after this. I will indeed be writing the second season, but it will probably be shorter and I may replace certain unimportant aspects of it with ones that were mostly cut out of that season. I will be continuing off of 'Coming Alive' for the second part, just to make things easier, but I will be taking a break before posting chapter 58. I hope you all have been having a nice weekend. I can't say the same for Kinnosuke, though, since I guess you could say he's** _ **down in the dumps**_ **. xD**


	57. Chapter 57

**Chapter Fifty-Seven**

Kotoko admired her ring across the dining room table during breakfast. It might've been weeks since I'd given it to her, but it was like she'd gotten it only a moment ago.

My mother sat in her chair next to Kotoko, eating her breakfast in peace but eyeing me.

"Yes?" I said. She folded her hands together.

"What are your plans for today?" She grinned.

"I was planning on going to the bookstore to get the next volume of my medical books." I said. My mother averted her gaze to Kotoko.

"And you, Kotoko?"

She stopped eating and bit her lip, thinking, "No, I don't think I have any plans."

"I have to work today." Mr. Aihara said.

"And I was planning on going down to Pandai and…" My father began but, with a disapproving look from my mother, stopped himself.

"Cancel it." She said. My father squinted his eyes at her.

"What?"

"Why?" I said.

"Everyone, cancel your plans. We're doing something today as a family." My mother said.

"Where is this coming from?" My father asked, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

"We have somewhere to be. All of us." She finished the sentence with a wicked smile and I wondered what she was up to.

"It's the first I've heard of it." I said. She pursed her lips.

"That's because it's supposed to be a surprise." She said, "So, cancel your plans. We're doing something. Trust me, you'll like it." My mother crossed her arms, not about to be hearing any rebuttals.

"If you say so, honey. I suppose I could put it off until tomorrow." My father caved, and so did I. No point in arguing since it was only a trip to the bookstore.

"Fine." I said. She turned to Mr. Aihara who took a minute before answering.

"The restaurant will fare fine without me today." He agreed.

My mother clapped her hands together, "That settles it!" She zipped from her chair to the kitchen with her plate, "Hurry and eat so we can leave in an hour. And make sure you look good. We're going somewhere nice!"

Kotoko looked to me as if to ask if I knew what was going on, but I shook my head. Knowing my mother, though, it seemed like this surprise was important to her. That was all I had to go on.

A short while later, my mother called Kotoko over, having filled the bath for her. After that, she went about helping Yuuki and my father get ready to leave. I did well enough on my own before she buzzed up the stairs to be sure I had.

When Kotoko came out of the bathroom fully bathed, she came right for me.

"What do you think she's going to have us doing?" She said and watched my mother bumble through the house from the top of the stairs.

"I don't know. She's really hard to predict." I watched from behind her.

"I guess we won't know until we get there." Kotoko scrunched her face up in a twinge of nerves.

"It can't be anything too bad," I assured her, "I wouldn't worry about it."

We descended the stairs to meet my mother's eager glances.

"Are you ready to go?" She said as she seemed to try to hold back on her excitement levels.

"Yes, we are." Kotoko smiled.

"Great!" My mother swung the front door open, "Let's go." She said in English and skipped out into the driveway like a child on the way to a festival. Kotoko and I followed suit, her father, my father, and Yuuki right behind us.

The six of us began a walk straight into town, my mother humming to herself. Kotoko stumbled over a crack in the sidewalk and I caught her by the shoulder. It happened again a few moments later. This time, I couldn't stifle a laugh.

"Careful. Keep tripping and you won't make it there alive."

She sighed.

It was around this time that Yuuki began to complain, since my mother had had yet to tell us where we were going and we'd been walking for almost half an hour.

He made his way to the front of the group, "Mom, are we there yet?"

"Soon." She said.

"Why so early on a Sunday morning?" My father said from the back.

"Will you at least tell us where we're going?" I asked in one final attempt. She faced me directly.

"To a wedding." The way she said it and the way she looked at me rubbed me the wrong way. I had a thought.

 _Oh, God._

Still, I said nothing and hoped that I was wrong. But there was something about all this, and it seemed like something my mother might do. I brushed it off and told myself I'd misinterpreted it.

My mother stopped dead in her tracks and pointed to a church across the street, "We're here!"

She led us to the entrance and blew the church doors open with a huge grin. I found myself facing Kotoko's two friends.

My mother danced over to where Kotoko stood admiring the inside of the church and took her by the hands, "This way," She brought her to her friends, "Now, go get ready. Everyone will be here soon."

"Wait, ready for what?" Kotoko said, as bewildered as she could have been. But, more than just bewildered, I was annoyed.

"Your wedding, of course." My mother started down the aisles, placing flowers and decorations.

" _My wedding?_ " Kotoko's eyes rounded like saucers and her friends proceeded to lead her away.

" _Mom…_ " I said, "How come we were never toldabout this?"

"Oh, don't be angry. It was supposed to be a nice surprise. I know how nervous I got the night before my wedding, and I couldn't help thinking it would be nice if you two didn't have to go through that," She stopped arranging, "You go get ready, too. I have a suit ready for you in one of the back rooms. Go on." She shooed me away. I took to the hall she directed me down and found a partially open door at the end of it. Sure enough, there hung a suit on the window. I took an irritated breath, feeling rushed and in the dark about this whole wedding.

I brought the suit down off the window and dressed in it. While I still wasn't very happy with this situation, my own nervousness distracted me. I was so unprepared for this.

I opened the window and sat on the couch at the far end of the room. There was a knock at the door, to which I said, "Come in."

My father entered and shut the door behind him.

"How are you doing?" He joined me on the couch, "Nervous?"

"No." I said.

"That's good. Your mother says she only invited a select group of close friends and family members." He rubbed his hands together.

"It's funny how the guests knew about it before the actual bride and groom." I said, careful to try to not work myself up.

"Your mother means no harm. I hope you know that." My father patted my shoulder with a firm grip.

"Yeah." Matter of fact, I _did_ know that. I could see that her reasoning for not telling anyone had us in mind, but it would've been nicer to have known, to be ready.

"Almost everyone is here now and the priest is waiting. You should get out there." He stood and opened the door for me.

"I'll be right there."

I gathered my thoughts alone for another minute, putting myself in a better frame of mind, and wandered back out into the main part of the church where twenty to thirty people sat waiting and a priest up at the altar. I glanced around at the faces on my way up, figuring out who was here.

To my total surprise, Kinnosuke sat perfectly still with his arms crossed beside Jinko. He could've looked happier, but that he was here meant he'd made progress and Kotoko could possibly stop feeling so badly.

Catching my look, he nodded his head once at me, his way of approval. A couple of seats ahead of him sat Watanabe who held a smirk that said he told me so.

When I arrived at my place before the altar, my mother with her camera in hand, a series of flashes blinded me and she beamed from behind the lens. It intensified my displeasure. Across the room, she motioned for me to smile.

The church doors opened to reveal Kotoko in her wedding gown, a veil over her face, and shrouded in morning light. She was beautiful. Everyone in their seats stood, and I myself stood taller. My previous vexation made itself seldom.

On her father's arm, they bowed at the entrance and came forward down the middle of the church. He gave her over to me with watery eyes. She clung to my arm as we made the rest of the way down the aisle.

"I can't believe we weren't told about this," I said as we were almost there, "But since you look so beautiful, I'll let it go."

Kotoko smiled at the floor.

At the altar, the priest cleared his throat, "Friends, we have joined here today with Naoki and Kotoko to share with them this most joyous moment. If any person can show just cause why they may not be joined together, let them speak now or forever hold their peace." He held for a moment, "Then we shall continue."

"You will respect, comfort, and help each other. You will remain faithful to your principals and be good to each other for better or for worse. Naoki, do you take this woman as your bride?"

"I do." I said. Kotoko's smile became wider.

"And Kotoko, do you take this man as your groom?"

"I do." She said and admired me through her veil.

The priest brought forward a pillow with two rings laid on it, "Now you may exchange rings, a declaration of your loyalty to each other."

We slipped the rings onto each other's fingers in the finality of this ceremony.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. Groom, you may now lift your bride's veil."

I lifted the veil over her head slowly and swept the train behind her shoulders. Kotoko giggled.

" _You loved me from a while ago, didn't you?_ " She whispered.

I almost felt my soul leave my body, "What?" She giggled again, "Are you getting carried away again?"

"I heard about the second time you kissed me. Yuuki told me." She said. This time I _actually_ felt my soul leave my body.

I turned to shoot a look at my younger brother, " _That Yuuki…_ "

When I turned back, she sprung herself forward and pressed her lips into mine, surprising me. I kissed back. When she pulled away and grinned up at me, I smiled back. Our lives would begin now.

 **A/N: And that's the end of part one. So commences my break, as I'm focusing on writing my book now. I don't know how long it'll be until I pick up for part two, but I hope you've enjoyed. ;D**


	58. UPDATE

Update: I realize it has been months since I last updated on this story, so I thought I'd let you know that I'm loading up and getting ready to start on the second part very soon. Expect it within the next week or two, and I'll link you all over to it. Also, if you have any suggestions on what I should name the second part, do tell, because I'm drawing a bit of a blank. Merry Christmas. :D


	59. Part 2 is here

Hi, everyone! It took longer than expected, but part 2 is finally here. You can read it here: s/12311163/1/Life-Begins-a-Naoki-POV-fanfic-part-2

I hope you enjoy. ;D


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